Night Howls
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Eyesight blurry here too.1
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Shit Steph @Kiwi Angel reading your current story is like reading my own. Mate, we are going through the same thing on opposite sides of the continent.
Coooooeeeee!!! ......and fuck you Tamoxifen.1 -
@kmakm me too. They do list it as one of the side effects of tamoxifen- it’s on the box to not drive if u feel off.0
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@JJ70. Wish we were closer so we could whinge over coffee (or wine)1
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@Flaneuse seems like a lot of us have some vision problems.1
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I've started doing the foot stretch that I was told to do when pregnant before I get out of bed or out of the car (when I remember). It doesn't stop the hobbling completely but it does help. During pregnancy it stops cramping but it seems to work for mobility now, too. Bring your toes up firmly towards your knees (so that if you were standing, your heel would be pointing downwards) - release, then repeat a couple of times. For the pregnancy thing, I was told not to point toes as this would make cramping worse. I don't know if this would apply now as well but I don't do it, anyway.1
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Another crap night - headachy and queasy and have to work extra hours today as someone as sick. Also means I get to do the work of 2 people all day for 12 hours
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Do you ever call in sick @Kiwi Angel? I don't, but changed that last week when I had a worse night than usual and just knew that I wouldn't be able to function.0
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Me too @Kiwi Angel What is it about 2.30am? I’ve usually already been tossing and turning for at least an hour .... then finally look at the clock. Yep, 2.30am again! I pretended I was asleep til just after 3am, then read for about an hour ..... still couldn’t drop off.
Feeling totally stuffed now.
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Geeze it's quiet here tonight. Don't tell me everyone's actually sleeping...0
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No, not me at least not now. Had my regulation 90 mins on the couch passed out with the TV on, then woke up and came to bed now wide awake obsessing about recurrence after 18 months and what to do about a million things that must have decisions made about them and how to decide about anything when you feel totally unmotivated and couldn't care less really. Seeing counsellor tomorrow just as well he is the only brightness in my week. Hope things are better at your end ...0
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Not remotely @Annski. I have "about a million things that must have decisions made about them" and how do you "decide about anything when you feel totally unmotivated and couldn't care less really"?! Got it in one my friend.
I saw my counsellor today. Cried of course. I can't see that I won't ever not feel like this. I can't see anything improving. I want it to, so that's why I see the psych, but it's a long road and requires such a massive overhaul. I can't see that I'll ever be able to do it. I'm so tired.
Plus our boofus doggie is sick and in the hospital tonight for the first time ever.
I hope that your recurrence worries pass and that you make some headway with your counsellor tomorrow tomorrow. K xox0 -
Oh dear, good grief! In the same boat then. Sorry to hear doggie is not well. I lost my beloved Betty the Cat just after my initial mastectomy, she was almost 25, now although I ache from missing her I am glad she's not here to see me like this, she would be so distressed. I know exactly what you mean about feeling you will never get past this. Everyone says you will but I'm getting worse. Trying to cover it up of course. However I hardly ever cry at the counsellor, just so grateful to be with someone who seems to be actually there for me, I only cry when I have to leave.
Still one day follows another and we paste the smile on the dial. Hope you get a bit of zzzzz soon. xx A.0
