I’m in a grey area and confused

Yes...the old statistics question. If I walked past a shop advertising 3% off all handbags, I probably wouldn't even bother going in. However, that 3% in a different scenario, can suddenly seem quite large. Cancer statistics are derived from huge amounts of people...hundreds of thousands or even millions, and each point counts. According to the Australian Bureau of Statistics, in 2023 there were 307 687 children aged 4 and 310 777 children aged 5...total of 618 464 kiddies aged 4 and 5. If 3% of them drowned in one year, that would be 1 855.38...one thousand eight hundred and fifty five (point three eight) dead children. Suddenly, that 3% seems substantial. This is a decision each person has to make for themselves, but what made up my mind for me, was the question of if the cancer did return, after me declining the treatment, would I be wondering if I might have been one of those in the three percent? Unfortunately at that point, I wouldn't be able to press a "Stop" "Rewind" button. Good luck with your treatment.

Hello @jo_c
Our stories sound very similar. I was also diagnosed with early stage, hormone positive, HER2 negative breast cancer. However, I had 2 lumps in my right breast and one in my left, therefore multifocal and simultaneously bilateral (which really scared me, but surgeon said was not a bad thing). I also had a micromet in one node (discovered after surgery which my oncos said posed no threat at all, and I was still considered stage 1). The lumps were grades 1 and 2, which was a positive. I was told if I had a DMX, that I wouldn’t need chemo or radiation, so I agreed. After surgery, my first surgeon told me I was a good candidate for chemo, simply because I was ‘young’ (39 at the time). I was gutted because he knew my age before the surgery and still told me what he told me. They couldn’t give me a better reason for having it. So, then I saw a medical onco who told me it was a grey area, and ultimately was my decision also. He said I didn’t really need it because the surgery did the job, but chemo would just be an extra help. I felt like crying because it was a huge decision to make on my own, and not enough time to make it. Too much unwanted pressure. I actually didn’t want chemo because I know the damage chemo can do, and my reasoning was that I also want to live a long time being so young, yet chemo can cause issues with vital organs which would’ve meant more medication, more side effects etc, and that also scared me. Plus, the benefit was only an extra 2%. Finally, I asked the oncologist’s registrar, who was also a young woman, what she would do in my situation. She said (in short) that she’s risk averse and wouldn’t opt for it. She had also said at a previous appointment that too many women choose to throw ‘everything’ at it, which isn’t always a good thing as lots of times, the risks seriously outweigh the benefits, so we need to make choices based on ourselves (her words), and that the hormone therapy would be more effective in my case. I liked her answer because I actually agree with it, and finally chose not to do chemo. 

Hi @jo_c, this must be a very difficult position to be in. The choice was pretty much taken away from me as I had stage 2 grade 3 IDC cancer (although only 2cm) with 1 lymph node involved. My oncologist strongly recommend I have chemo, so I did. I may have thought more about it if it hadn't already spread, but my reasoning was if it had already spread to 1 lymph node it was possible it was elsewhere. My benefit was 7%. I'm towards the end of my chemo, and so far it hasn't been as bad as I though it would be (I was lucky and haven't suffered any sickness and nausea) but side effects vary from person to person, and I'll be very happy when this phase is over.

Like @Katie46, my oncologist recommended chemo (post mastectomy) - I had one malignant lymph node and the cancer type had shifted from the original tumour to the node (not metastasised but changed). Before seeing my oncologist, my surgeon said to remember that chemo might only improve my chances by a few points, but the few points could be really important. I did six months chemo. Chemo is no guarantee - nothing is really. You’ve had cancer once, there’s no
rule that says it can’t happen again. If I were to get cancer again, I may do chemo
again. I’m a bit addicted to living. I’d also want to know what other options are now available that weren’t nearly 12 years ago. I have a slightly irritating (no pain, little day to day impact) long term side effect from chemo, my organs are all fine. But as everyone says, this is hugely personal. The only one who needs to feel right about this is you. Best wishes whatever you decide.