Is that right? Did you really say that?
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I tell them it's really good makeup.3
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@kmakm That's interesting. Several close friends have said the same to me, and I accepted it because I've thought myself that the skin on my face has looked ok even when I feel like shite. I've always been told I have good natural colouring in my complexion (apart from the cancer bits I've had chopped out a few times!), and I do continue to look after my facial skin. The person who pissed me off with her comment just sounded so accusatory; odd how people can't offer a compliment or some encouragement without putting a negative edge on it. But as I say, super-sensitive at the moment.2
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@Flaneuse You are doing so well to keep slogging through this marathon Fran. Hang in there and soon it'll be receding in the rearview mirror and it will be au revoir to that. And I'm planning to come to Brisbane next year to drink some vin avec toi (I'm presuming the familiarity and not using vous!) and @onemargie so if nothing else you can look forward to that. Or dread it and dodge me with fury at that presumptuous Victorian! K xox0
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@kmakm How wonderful, Kate! I really look forward to that. On va prendre un verre (ou deux) ensemble, toi et moi ! And I'm sure @onemargie will be up for it too. Fran xox1
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Oh my God I'm so happy I found this post! I find I'm dealing more with the hurt of finding out people really don't give a crap about me, rather than the BC itself! I have family who are so self-centred and I only realised in the last few years after a different medical situation. From my Mum especially, who I've always been the emotional support for, for my entire life.
All the pamphlets say 'talk to family and friends about your fears'. Haha! Sorry who?? My opening line is a trigger for my parents to go on about themselves. After telling them I had BC, my mum apparently rang my sister and said "I don't know what's happening, why is all this bad luck happening to us". Us???
After I rang and told my mother-in-law, my sister in law then rang my husband to say we should all have dinner to catch up and then sat there with a smirk she couldn't cover up while my husband tried to tell everyone about my cancer without crying. I mistook her smirk for shock and tried comforting her. Imagine the feeling when I found out later they all already knew. They all live 2 minutes away!!
Everyone else who is supposed family? Maybe a messenger message, no visits or support.
Most support has come from my Softball team who I've only known a few months!
But you know what? They have all given me permission to worry only about me. They've given me permission to never worry about them. They've given me permission to not feel the guilt I usually do if I can't help someone. They've given me permission to not need their permission to live my own life. It's just pretty lonely, and yet there are people all around me!
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Mez Diaz. This is not only a medical condition, its a damn tough mental one today. Right now you only need to think about yourself. Bugger the ones who have proven not worthy of your time. At least now you know. When the time comes, start filling your life with new aquaintances. The most important person in your life right now is you. Your main objective is to get through this stress free with or without support. There will always be support from the breast care nurse, your oncology team etc. Try the support groups if you're up to it, as least they know what your going through. When it's the middle of the night there is always here, where you can voice your ups and downs. Take care of yourself.
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Hello @MezDiaz
The softball team sound fantastic, how great to know that you can be yourself with them. Many of the women that I have spoken to over the years have said that you realize who your real friends are, sometimes support comes from those that you least expect while there can be other friends or family that you feel let down by. Take care of yourself.
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Hahaha I had the chemo glow...I looked fantastic but felt like shit. People would say oh you look great and I’d say..opposed to what? And they would say well chemo makes you sick and usually look like your dying. I’d just shake my head and say I think you watch to many movies.4
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It's funny to read of this 'glow' as it obviously exists. The girl who was looking after my salon during treatment is also a beautician. On my good days when I appeared for work she would rave about my skin and how good it looked and that I didn't look sick. Must have been the 'chemo glow'.0
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I had the glow too and I think the Dex Tablets might of had something to do with it as well.0
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I don't know if I glowed (probably in the dark maybe) but I was very excited by the fact that my dermatitis seemed to disappear on chemo. I made this comment to my onc once and he laughed and said, "I wouldn't get too excited, it's because of all the steroids you're getting" DOH!0
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My skin improved immeasurably on chemo and I took hardly any steroids at all. The improvement lasted too! Still don't recommend bc as a form of skin care......6
