All Alone
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Hello @ayrhaven
You are never really alone now that you have reached out to this network of very helpful ladies who know what you are going through on many levels.
As has been said, reach out and allow people to help you as you would do to help others.
My goodness, 3200 acres is huge - but what a nice area you live in.
Good that you were able to get hubby into care as that takes one load off your mind, you know he is safe. A friend needs her hubby in care but with the current virus situation no-one is taking people here.
On a personal level, reach out so others can be at the end of the phone for you. It is a difficult situation at the moment but you will get through it as you've shown your resilience in what you said above.
I will send you a private message. (Check the top right hand corner, the icon to the right of your user name).1 -
Hello @ayrhaven welcome to our online forum. I am sorry to hear that you have been diagnosed with breast cancer and that your husband has recently had a stroke. Such a stressful time for both of you. Dont hesitate to call our helpline on 1800 500 258 to speak with a cancer nurse for information and or support. We are open 7 days a week including over Easter. Wishing you all the best with your surgery on Wednesday.0
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Hi all
We have elderly neighbours who are really alone but we've worked out a way to chat 'face to face'. He is 90 and very immune-compromised so we had to think it through .......
We each make our own cuppas and take a chair to whichever house which has the best sitting spot for the day, sunny but not hot, and one sits inside their door whilst the visitor sits well outside the door.
We chat and laugh and it helps us all as we adhere to isolation rules.
@ayrhaven, perhaps your friends could do this with you ?1 -
That sound a good idea. I will have a bit of a problem with that. My next door neightbour is 3km one way and 6km the other. I might sit outside and talk to the bull which it behind the house or the get the bike and sit in the paddock watching the calves play. They are very good time waisters.
sue6 -
Hey @ayrhaven - you are not alone !
We are all here for you so come on and chat/yell/ask at any time.
All the best for tomorrow. Anne1 -
Hi All, As the time is ticking away and I am alone in the house the more frightened I am becoming. My husband is care now so the house is empty. Surgery tomorrow, I don't know what to expect, my mind is thinking the worst. I am afraid of the outcome and think of what will happened to my husband and my brand new $12,000 dollar embroidery machine, am I going to value for money out of it. I hate not knowing what is going to happen. My BC nurse has said we take one day at time but that is so hard when you are at home, crying and waiting for it to be over. I am open to idea on how other people coped. Over next 2 weeks at least I will have plenty of think time. I might even be motivated to do lots of craft but I will still be in the house by myself because of COVID-19.
Sue0 -
We all need think time. Unless we get a BC diagnose. Then think time is scary. What are you going to make with your new machine? Have you purchased the material, patterns, etc? Time to get creative and put that think time into something positive. In another week you will want to be doing something so get organised now. Also, get a few meals cooked so it is easier when you get back home. I had a mastectomy and I was fine until they took me into surgery prep. Then I hit panic stations. After surgery, I was ready to take on anything and rarin’ to go. Is there anything around the house that will take your full attention that you can concentrate on for now? Sending big hugs.0
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You BC nurse is correct - take one day at time. Get through tomorrow first. Try to calm the brain a bit and don't let it build up too much.
Your new embroidery machine will get lots of use !!! Now is the time to think of designs etc. Use this time to your advantage.
Are you into music ? Use that to stir you along as you sew or use it to help calm your nerves, whatever works.
Remember the computer (this site) plus your phone are the best supports at the minute. Keep in touch with people. With this virus many people feel the same as you do so SMSs and emails are great.
Use the helplines available if you need to talk. The BCNA helpline is there for times such as this.
Did the BC nurse give you details of any local support groups ? If so, use them as they have all "been there, done that" and will be happy to support you.
We are all thinking of you.
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Best wishes for your surgery - I am not sure what it will entail but my mastectomy (and axillary clearance) was really quite painless and my arm mobility was good. I was up and around pretty quickly. Drains can be a pain but best to leave them in place for however long your medicos decide. Many people find that starting treatment boosts morale - you can actively DO something, even if some of the side effects are unpleasant. Take care.1
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All the best for your surgery tomorrow - I hope that you are surprised when you find it isn't half as bad as you've thought it will be xx
Take care, stay safe, and make haste SLOWLY xx1 -
@ayrhaven Good luck tomorrow. Sending hugs ❤️🌸💕1
Thinking of you xx