Breast friends are vital when you’re diagnosed with breast cancer
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Just saw (part of) the advert on Channel 9 for the first time!! Well done girls! You ROCK!!1
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I haven’t been on this forum for a very long time and read this post with interest. I joined a support group early last year an advanced breast cancer group after a rather weird interview process of three times before being told I was accepted despite having metastatic breast cancer. Lucky me .....I needed support and kind words of encouragement as I have a family that are non supportive not meaning to be they are kind of over it really and aren’t into it in the beginning or the novelty wore off. Ha not for me. So I saw this Advanced Breast Cancer group with weekly SUPPORT teleconferences and my ears pricked up finally some support others who just may get it and understand. oh wow how wrong I was. It totally did my head in and others expressed the same to me I finally made the move and left expressing the reasons and it didn’t go down very well but I told the truth. It was a group for gifting memory boxes and start packing them for the setting sun you were about to never see. One session I was asked how I was and after expressing I had been dizzy I was informed literally brain mets were common in my dire situation and to have a mri. I spent that entire night frozen with fear and my oncologist organised an immediate MRI I spent two whole weeks sick with fear and when my dear doctor rang burst into uncontrollable tears on her announcement my brain was perfectly fine.It turned out it was the antihistamines I had been taking for a skin reaction to a drug I was on. I knew then the depressing discussions about we had all had it and who had just bitten the bullet and had their last sunset was more detrimental to my health than support. Since one of the other members and I left the group we’ve both been a thousand times happier and healthier. It did our heads in. I would like some support but in a positive happy way because with the wonderful drugs we have these days and our ability to be healthy as we can to fight it we are all defying odds and living longer maybe even able to be that 1 lucky percent that beats stage four cancer in the world. I hope it’s me and each and everyone that has the same on here. And no one has the right to make you feel your doomed with this diagnosis. If we are told we are we may as well be. A support group should be just that. I know ladies encouragement and positivity is just what we need not people who are funded and believe they help us along to our fate and believe accepting it is supportive. Ahhhhhh not on in my opinion ......
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Sorry .... iserbrown you missed the plot here with my post totally. I am the most positive person in the world. The point of my post was to say not always are support groups supportive in the right way and the one I joined was the opposite. Seriously I put one post on and your negativity and missing the plot is exactly why I don’t look this online forum up any more. wow talk about read something into my post that wasn’t there 🙄
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@Sam09 I think @iserbrown was actually saying that the other support group you were In wasn’t positive but that you are and she is happy to support you.5
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Dear oh dear @Sam09
I know you are positive and thanks @Blossom1961 for backing up my intent!
We as the collective are here to support. The other group you spoke of, I too would've walked
Perhaps read my post again and why would I tell you to whistle your favourite tune? Something that I suggested long ago and you appreciated
Sorry you feel so shitty but do not take it out on us who have everyone's best interest at heart
Goodness me!3 -
@Sam09, I've got stage 4 as well, everyone reacts differently, my family were all oh no poor mum, then when I didnt fall off the perch in the next few months it was business as usual, which is actually mostly fine with me because I really didn't like the sad eyes I got from everyone at first. I'm not a join a group type of person, I've thought about it but I got the feeling it would be sort of like what you encountered, all doom and gloom and preparing for the worst, talking about wills and power of attorney blah blah, etc, so not into that so I started going to the local bingo, I get to hang out with people my age and talk about all sorts of things, we talk about the aches and pains and all the assorted crap associated with getting older but we're not focused on my cancer and dying but our kids and grandkids and just general every day stuff which works so much better for me. We are all different though and this forum is a great place to come to for reassurance and support for those of us that are struggling or don't have support at home or don't want to burden their families with their concerns because a lot of times our family and friends cope even worse than we do and everyone here gets that and has our backs.
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iserbrown
again I reiterate I’m not at all shitty ....
all good no worries.......😊
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All good!
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