A bit naughty - but funny!!! Show us your 'naughty ones'! Please note some posts may offend.
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Finally some women have found a use for it !!!!!3 -
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Oh, that's a good one. LOL
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Lighten up everyone ... this thread IS for the more 'silly/funny/slightly offensive' jokes ..... so some leniency is expected ..... that is why 'some posts may offend' is added to the title!
And I am pretty sure that Charlie DID have his ears pinned way back in his late teens @June1952 .... Agreed, @FLClover - Andrew is totally creepy!
hehe, Personally tho, I thought it was hilarious - but, as we all know, I am well known to have a rather quirky sense of humour!! LOL
take care, peeps xx
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@June1952 I've just sent you a private message.0
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OMG, this is SO funny .... specially the lady on the right with the dangly bits ..... very clever, actually!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b722Zfby5Yo
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In the UK, the Opposition Health Minister was doing an annual visit to a hospital. As always, he was looking for something to beat the NHS with to show how badly run and 'loss making' things were there.He checked all the books and then did his tour. While on the tour he turned to the ward manager and said, "I notice you buy and use a lot of bandages. What do you do with the plastic middle out of the roll?"
"Good question", noted the ward manager, "we save them up and send them back to Johnson and Johnson and every once in a while, they send us a free bandage roll. We like to recycle whenever possible."
"Oh" he said somewhat disappointed that his unusual question had a practical answer. But on he went in his tour to the next ward.
"What about all these coloured casts you dispense. They seem to be rather a waste of money?""Ah, yes", replied the ward manager realising that he was trying to trap her, "We ask that any patient wishing a coloured cast donates £1, which is far in excess of the 10p the colouring actually costs".
The Opposition Health Minister was determined to fluster the ward manager. So on they went to the next ward.
"Well, what do you do with all the remains from the circumcision surgeries?" "Here too we do not like wasting", said the manager. "What we do, is save all the little foreskins, and send them to the government in London and about once a year, at this exact time, they send us a complete prick".8 -
Gosh - this gave me a laugh ......
I had an epiphany today during my BC radiation treatment. As I lay there with my mind wondering, I realised that radiation is just like being with one of my ex boyfriends.
I go in, exchange casual pleasantries, get undressed, lay down, let the machine do it’s thing. I don’t feel anything, intermittently hold my breath and close my eyes. It’s over before I even know it started.
Then I get up, get dressed, exchange good byes and say “See ya tomorrow” as I leave.
He probably lasted about six weeks too.
I guess that’s why he’s an ex and in 4 more weeks I also get to break up with radiation and move on with my life.
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Whilst in China , a man (who is very sexually promiscuous and does not use a condom all the time) is there, having the time of his life.A week after arriving back home in Sydney, he wakes one morning to find his penis covered withbright green and purple spots.Horrified, he immediately goes to see a doctor. The doctor, never having seen anything like this before,orders some tests and tells the man to return in two days for the results.The man returns a couple of days later and the doctor says, "I've got bad news for you, you've contractedMongolian VD. It's very rare and almost unheard of here, we know very little about it."The man looks a little perplexed and says, "Well, give me a shot or something and fix me up, Doc."The doctor answers, "I'm sorry, there's no known cure. We're going to have to amputate your penis"The man screams in horror, "Absolutely not! I want a second opinion!!!"The doctor replies, "Well, it's your choice. Go ahead, if you want, but surgery is your only option."The next day, the man seeks out a Chinese doctor, figuring that he'd know more about the disease.The Chinese doctor examines his penis and proclaims, "Ah, yes, Mongolian VD. Vewy ware disease."The guy says to the doctor, "Yeah, yeah, I already know that, but what can we do about it?My doctor wants to cut off my penis!"The Chinese doctor shakes his head and laughs. "Stupid Australian docttah, always want opawate.Make more money dat way. No need amputate!""Oh, thank God!" the man exclaims."Yes,"says the Chinese doctor, "Wait two week. Fawl off by itself.5
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Happy Velentine's ...
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