I have just been diagnosed a few weeks ago and will undergo a mastectomy and breast reconstruction later this week.At times it feels so surreal and then there is a sudden sense of feeling so overwhelmed and it is so all consuming.Then find myself trying to keep "busy" and maybe that is my way of avoiding confronting the diagnosis, have spoken with the psychologist which helped immensely.By nature I am a "planner", I plan everything however this feels so out of my control.Thank you for reading/listening.

Hi @Gin1966,Your feelings of all consuming worry are normal. Being a planner will be useful. I always requested copies of all of my test results. My mind would race until I fully understood my situation. Only then could I feel somewhat in control. I don't know how some patients are happy to go with the flow and just trust in the 'experts'. Lucky I did insist on keeping track as, in my experience of the public health system, I have had to remind the oncologist of my case every time I see her! (obviously not time to read the file or prepare for appointment). Keep planning! It will take time, but you will feel more normal again. <3

Hi @Gin1966, it was so helpful to read this post and the replies from the lovely people in this group. Like you i was diagnosed just recently (4th June) and found out five days ago that I need a mastectomy. I'm also reeling from the news and I'm exhausted by the non-stop thinking about my breast cancer. I feel like my life has been paused and nothing else matters except dealing with this nightmare.But we've got this. And we've got lots of support here. (Also I don't know if your username is indicative of your date of birth but if it is I am the same age as you too!)

Hi @Gin1966,Sorry to hear of your diagnosis. All of us can empathise. The first few weeks are stressful and scary. After my first week i felt sick of people poking and prodding and i wanted action but i was terrified too. The wait for surgery seemed endless and this hieghtened the sense of panic.Not sure if this helps but i felt enormous relief after surgery because we were finally getting on with something concrete. Hopefully you will too. Things will start to get planned out and you will get on with the business of getting well and caring for yourself. I think most people start to come to terms to a degree as you go along. The best thing is to try to take one step at a time, worry about what is happening at each stage. Look after yourself, be kind to yourself.M

Hi there @Gin1966, it is all such a shock isn't it. I think after I was diagnosed I cried for 2 weeks. It is a roller-coaster but you will get through it. Seeing a psychologist early is great. Good to have all the support props in place. It takes time to process it all. I am a planner too. I felt better once my surgery was done and the whole treatment plan was developed and I knew all the treatment I had to go through. I had surgery, chemo, radium, more surgery and now tamoxifen. I am now one yr and 2 months post my diagnosis. It was alot to go through but I am doing well and you will too. One step at a time. Stay as much as possible in the present moment. If you are into mindfulness it is good and so too is a bit of exercise, even gentle walks. Just do what you enjoy and please make yourself the priority. If you are like many others here we all looked after everyone else first and put ourselves second. Make all this treatment and getting well your number one thing. It was a change for me but it is better not just for me but everyone else too. Good luck, stay in touch as you go through this as we are all here to help. The people here are all just so amazing. Hugs 🌺

@annajjj your life is def put on pause. Right now the most important thing is beating this. Everything else can wait. But don’t forget to find joy too. Just because you’re fighting bc doesn’t mean fun has to be put on hold too. Have a bath, dance around the house, meditate, go for beach walks etc. You’ll still think about the ca, but you’ll feel a lot more relaxed, and your body will feel loved again and re-find its motivation for living. One thing, you’ll def stop thinking about bc one day in the future. It doesn’t seem like it now, understandably, but you will. It won’t be on your mind 24/7, and it won’t scare you anymore cos you’ll feel much stronger. Then you’ll resume your life, in a new and better way, and even get annoyed at the thought it once butted in your life so rudely ♥️.

Overwhelmed | BCNA Online Network

MicheleR
Member
4 years ago
Hi @Gin1966,

Sorry to hear of your diagnosis.

All of us can empathise. The first few weeks are stressful and scary. After my first week i felt sick of people poking and prodding and i wanted action but i was terrified too. The wait for surgery seemed endless and this hieghtened the sense of panic.

Not sure if this helps but i felt enormous relief after surgery because we were finally getting on with something concrete. Hopefully you will too. Things will start to get planned out and you will get on with the business of getting well and caring for yourself.

I think most people start to come to terms to a degree as you go along.

The best thing is to try to take one step at a time, worry about what is happening at each stage. Look after yourself, be kind to yourself.

M
FLClover
Member
4 years ago
Everything you described is also how I felt. As said above 👆🏻, being a planner will be in your favour if you ask for all results and ask to be informed enough so you can be involved in all the decisions. And please remember, most of the time the situation is not as scary as we have imagined it. But don’t expect to feel like you’re in control of everything, cos that could be part of the problem. Just trust that your medical experts will do their best to help you, but also trust your own body and mind.
Dory65
Member
4 years ago
Hi @Gin1966,
Your feelings of all consuming worry are normal. Being a planner will be useful. I always requested copies of all of my test results. My mind would race until I fully understood my situation. Only then could I feel somewhat in control. I don't know how some patients are happy to go with the flow and just trust in the 'experts'. Lucky I did insist on keeping track as, in my experience of the public health system, I have had to remind the oncologist of my case every time I see her! (obviously not time to read the file or prepare for appointment). Keep planning!

It will take time, but you will feel more normal again. <3

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