WHO do I tell?
I was diagnosed with early-stage breast cancer 2 weeks ago and had a lumpectomy with sentinel node biopsy last week. I’m recovering , but figuring out support has been tricky. I’m single, with a small close circle — amazing women who are already doing what they can, but they’re busy and going through a lot themselves. I know I need more help, but the next layer of friends includes people who always overshare others private news. I’m hesitant to open up, even though some of them might be able to support me practically. I also love my privacy, alone time I'm not good at asking for what I want/ need - and so far have managed. So I’m a bit stuck between needing more help and not being sure who I feel safe relying on. Has anyone else struggled with this? How did you decide who to tell or lean on — especially when trust or privacy was a concern? Should I even worry about privacy - would it be so bad if the whole world knew...? I prob feel it might from romantic and future job perspective... Thank you in advance!
Papillary Lesion - overwhelming anxiety
Hi Everyone, Sorry if this isn't the right place for this post, but I'm feeling overwhelmed and very alone right now. I have been a member here for 13 years and it's crazy to think that it was initially to help support my mum with her breast cancer. Now, here I am with my own possible issue... My mother developed her breast cancer (stage 2c) at age 46, the same age I am now. She's alive and well after treatment (partial mastectomy and hysterecotomy), but it's also meant that I get my boobs checked regularly via mammo and/or ultrasound. This year, they found a 'papillary lesion or complex cyst' - that's what it says on my GP's referral for me to get another U/S and a core biopsy if needed. I mean, it's hard to NOT know someone who's been through a breast cancer journey these days. There are so many women who've experienced it. I've always felt like my turn was just around the corner. What's probably made me even more anxious is that my dear cousin is battling Stage 4 MBC and I've been in contact with her frequently to try and support her. She and I are in very similar circumstances (ie. living alone with kids) so I can't help but feel very deeply for her. I think holding that emotional space has done a number on me... Compounding the issue is that I have pretty severe PTSD which I've got under control for years now, but suddenly I'm having panic attacks and struggling to do even the most basic tasks. I have no idea what I'll be like when I get the results of the second scan/biopsy. I live alone with my 17-year-old (who has special needs). Frankly, I'm terrified and the fear is paralysing me. GP is urging me to make mental health appointments to get it under control. What will happen to my child if I get sick? Sorry for the ramble. Any advice or wisdom would be so appreciated. I feel better just making this post. Thanks, Effy.
Feeling scared and just a bit angry
Hi, I'm Karen, 61yo, from Victoria. I was diagnosed in September, my birthday actually, I was numb. I had been dealing with a very coercive relationship, narcissism, gaslighting the lot, to be told this news was just too much, I had all sorts going through my head, How do I tell my children? How do I do this? Why me? Everything was so hard to process and even now I'm struggling. I was told it was an Oestrogen based cancer, sorry I cant remember much of that conversation, but 2 Biopsies, the first one they biopsied the wrong lymph node, Pet scan, M.R.I and blood test later to be told sorry its not good news, well having a lump in the breast isnt good news anyway but, I had my right breast and Lymph nodes removed, then to be told its bad news I'm so sorry was another kick in the guts, 35 of my 36 nodes were affected, so onto another more thorough Pet scan, blood test and M.R.I, To get the good news that it wasn't anywhere else in my body. Now I'm preparing for Chemo to start on the 2nd of Jan and I'm absolutely terrified, I have no emotional or any other support at home, even though I'm told everyday that he cares, they say actions speak louder than words well Im yet to see any, my son who is my heart, doesn't know how to deal with this and neither do I. They have just had an Eptopic pregnancy and I'm hurting for them, we were all so excited and happy. I don't know what to do or how I'm going to do it, my living situation is so toxic to my mental health and is impacting on my son and daughter-in-law as well. My partner is trying to get me out of the house and that is something I can't deal with at the moment as I'm trying to deal with being there for my son and daughter-in-law and Chemo, I feel like I'm rambling, my life is a mess, I just don't know what to do. Sorry for the rambling talk I'm not very good at putting things on paper, everything is very disjointed.
16 Weeks Pregnant and diagnosed with aggressive hormonal breast cancer
As the title says, I am currently 16 weeks pregnant with my first child, I turn 32 in Feb and have no family history of breast cancer. My surgeon has said I will need a mastectomy in the next week or 2. To say overwhelmed and unsure about my future is a complete understatement. I have found limited people in the same position as me and really don't feel confident as much as everyone has told me to stay strong and positive. I know I'm very lucky to have the support I do have around me, but obviously it's such a different situation that no one knows how to approach.
Newly diagnosed - feeling lost despite stuff happening.
I was diagnosed a few weeks ago, rarer invasive mucinal carcinoma. Coping well with what I know is happening but not so well with what I need to do, or where to get explanations. I’m having a Scout clip implanted tomorrow because I can’t have the MRI my surgeon requested. I have a CRT (heart) device and MRI was requested because the cancer is not well defined. So now I won’t know extent, lumpectomy, mastectomy, until the operation. Operation is on 28th. I guess my main thing is who to talk to about what will happen next. Having Pre Op stuff at GP next week, but do I just wait until the hospital gives me more detail? Do I ask to see a breast care nurse, there’s one at the surgeons office? Seeing GP I have so much to ask and take in because I’m on lots of drugs for too many health issues and I have to stop some, take less of others. And my normal confidence has flown the coop. Is this just a normal reaction?Shock is settling
it’s been two weeks since my diagnosis. I live in regional coastal NSW and I’m going to start here by being very grateful for the speed of testing and action down here. Unexpected really. I found a lump but it turns out it’s an undefined tumour about 2.5cm. Some stuff is still not definite because I can’t have an MRI thanks to having a heart failure device (super pacemaker). So having a scout clip placed next week with probable lumpectomy in two to three weeks. I feel confident I’m being cared for OK. Glad I’m retired and no longer working. But still overwhelmed by this and trying to manage my usual approach of knowing every little detail about anything impacting me. I’m listening to my anxiety for once. Oh. My surgeon told me I’m not going to die! That was particularly comforting. Dat by day this thing is feeling more manageable.
Time to process
Hi All, my intro post. Such a roller coaster of emotions and processing suddenly going from perfectly healthy to not! I had a Diagnosis 22/12/23 IDC with 2.9cm tumor and lymphnode involvement from BreastscreenSA. ER and PR +, Her -. (Xmas is harsh to get such news, both in the slow down of services and in telling nearest and dearest) It has taken a while (necessary tests, scans and byopsies), but looking at treatment beginning Wed 28/2/24 with surgery (partial masectomy, axillary node clearance). Then most likely chemo, radio, hormone therapy. Overactive imagination has been a problem, general stress/anxiety, and not sleeping well. It is settling a bit now, as Ive met surgeon and feel comfortable I am in good hands, met with Breast nurse (and now have a bright pink pillow and lovely accessories pouch for fluid tubes). I am participating in a clinic trial that I meet criteria on that I decided yes to assist. I am going ahead on a planned and booked holiday next week (which several family are also going), the surgeon was supportive on proceding with this as mental health positive. Then it is full steam ahead! I am fortunate to have supportive family, and some great friends, some who have had a bc journey themselves. Was concerned about work for a while, but Ive let the h.r. depts know (two jobs) of upcoming medical, and am scaling back for as long as I need (casual events hospitality - high energy, physical and customer facing, they will still be there when I can manage again!) So I think I am in about the best positive I can be for now! Not keen on whats to come, but ok to get on with what needs to be done! Thanks for reading, and thanks to all those sharing posts and info themselves - it has helped.New diagnosis shocked and devastated
Moderator moved @susie55 comment in Activity section to new discussion post: susie55 Hi my name is Susie, today 30 September 9.30 I got my biopsy result I've got breast cancer I'm 54 year old, I'm shocked and devastated I feel lonely. My brain doesn't function anymore. My surgeon tell me to do few test and port insert and what kind treatment I’ll get. Anyone have any advise for me? My stress is rocket High at sky, I already can't sleep for couple weeks ( when I first fund my lump) always woke up cant back to sleep. Cant eat always worry a lot of stress. and I'm sorry English is not my first language I hope everyone who reading this understand 🙏 i never ever thought I’ll get cancer because I doing breast test every couple year and last year is Clear. Dr Said I have dense breast, Anyone have same problem with me? How to manage stress and manage another test and waiting the result? ( MRI, PET scan and heart Scan ) Manage the chemo etc …. Any help appreciate 🙏
Anxious Newly Diagnosed
Hi everyone. From what I have read it appears this is THE place for me. I was diagnosed on the 2nd May after having a routine Mammogram in April. I was called back due to something showing up on the Mammogram and subsequently had another Mammogram and Ultrasound and then a biopsy. Diagnosis is that I have invasive breast carcinoma with micropapillary features, provisional grade 3 which is ER and PR positive. Fast forward 11 days and I have seen my surgeon who will operate on the 28th May to remove the lump and sentinel node, at this stage. I guess I just wanted to touch base with those of you who are going through this scary time right now. I know I am not alone, however feel alone, even though my hubby is very understanding. Am I getting in my head too much????? Probably YES! Anyway, I have never waited on a date to arrive so quickly as surgery day! :# I am trying to stay busy and remain positive as the surgeon tells me that this has been caught early, however it doesn't take away the fact that I feel like I am facing a challenge to my mortality. Is this normal?
