Is "Brian" the new Farnham??

LoisLois Member Posts: 43
edited May 2020 in Day to day
So.......I thought I had given my lump "Brian" a beautiful farewell concert, complete with audience, drinks and a hearty "F...k Off Brian" back in March.  At that stage, I was cruising through the Stage 1, grade 3 euphoria of "You got this Girl!"  Doctor will do a Lumpectomy one morning, rip out a few nodes, dose of radiation and some pills just in case. 
Oh yeah, I was still scared,  but I was being told - "we" got this!" 
"Brian" has left the building!!!

So......the discovery of a 85mm lump of "Brian" and 4 positive nodes and 1 pissed off node, caused panic and it is now Mastectomy time.

The family and I throw a "Fast and Furious" Movie Marathon as a Farewell to "Lefty". Receive a beautiful Love Note from my oldest daughter thanking "Lefty" for being an amazing breast and the Husband gets the final touch..

Rocked up for surgery on 6th May -it goes really well.  Up and about that afternoon walking with the drip in my room, that I share with a 72 year old Lady who "Screams" in her sleep, calls out my name nonstop, refuses to eat and sneaks off for cigarette breaks.
I wanted to go home just so i could actually sleep and rest!!!

Anyway, 2 days after surgery, Dr. (I am God) Bolshy turns up with his entourage of Junior Registrars and says - "you can go home and by the way you are now Stage 3, Grade 3 and walks off." 
W.T.F. Did you just say?

I had to chase this Bastard down the hallway and make him come back to my room!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

he refuses to tell me anymore other than you have jumped from Stage 1 to Stage 3 - the surgical team will tell you. I met up with the Surgical team last week and all hell breaks loose!

"Brian" made a comeback!!!

In fact "Brian" had been a busy little Lead Singer - shacking up with as many "Cell Groupies" as he could find the energy for and also shacked up with a Node (making 5 positive now and 1 annoyed) while spreading the love around!
All he needed was 3 weeks of love action and he had created another 2mm aggressive growing "lump" near the original site where he was sliced/diced from the show and left his love juice in the form of 18mm of "Baby growing cancer cells" in my milk ducts.

I am literally so shocked, I am unable to talk, comprehend or make any sense of what i was being told.
What happened to "We got this??"   Even though I am told "Brian is gone" and all is well - I am wondering if  "Brian" is going to do a Farnsy and keep on making a comeback tour???

Anyway, IF Brian has left any love juice in my body or is thinking of making a 'Come Back" tour -  He is in for a rude shock!  I have a new band signed up to play in my body - SHE is called "Chemo and The Chemicals".....playing Centre Stage for the next 5 months in LOIS TOWN.....!! (lol)

My new Motto: Find positivity in the little things and Use your words to defeat adversaries!

Big Hugs
Lois......who is not a Doctor's doormat.


  • Afraser
    Afraser Member Posts: 4,388
    And terrific words they are too! Probably best to write things down rather than taking a piece of 2 x 4 to your Dr Bolshy, but he would have deserved it, preferably in front of his retinue so that they can learn what happens if you can’t treat patients like people. It is what it is. The new band doesn’t need a lead singer, so Brian can go. Your cell mate sounds like the one I had when hospitalised with an infection ( a seroma that didn’t know what Stop now! Enough! meant) who talked incessantly, except through The Bold and the Beautiful (??) and left her TV on all night. Best wishes for the next steps, keep those words going, they’ll see you right. 

  • Tinks
    Tinks Member Posts: 234
    Chemo and the chemicals are more than a match for Brian. Bring on the show. 

    Seriously though it must be shattering to go from a Stage 1 to a Stage 3 in such a short time, set your world upside down one more time. So much to adjust to and understand. 

    I hope your chemo starts ASAP so you can feel that you are getting the rubber on the road here.

    Lots of love Tinks xx

    PS Thank you for showing Dr Bolshy what is unacceptable. 
  • LoisLois
    LoisLois Member Posts: 43
    Thanks Ladies for the kind and encouraging words!!!  I know my sense of humour can be slightly perverse for some but I have found it to be a help for mental stability to be able to unleash it...otherwise I think I would be crying nonstop and feeling overwhelmed with it all, as I am sure you will understand.  As to Chemo - my first cycle begins next week.  Tad bit nervous / apprehensive but that is okay to feel that - to cope with that, I have been online shopping!!  Wow, I am going to be rocking those scarves, beanies and turbans.....!!!!!!!!!!!!  Big Hugs and much love  Lois....
  • Dory65
    Dory65 Member Posts: 323
    WTF! @LoisLois,
    not a scenario anyone wants. Your family sounds gorgeous, though, and I've no doubt you'll rock the headgear. Thinking of you and wishing you all the best. x
  • Locksley
    Locksley Member Posts: 938

    @loislois OMG Doctors bedside manner makes a huge difference.  Glad you called him out on it.   Especially to speak like a "dick" in front of juniors is not OK.   I love your sense of humour.   Mine is a little twisted and it is helping me at this time.  Not everyone gets it though.  I have also been looking on ebay for headware.  Thinking of you.  xxx 

  • Zoffiel
    Zoffiel Member Posts: 3,372
    edited May 2020
    Oh ARSE @LoisLois! Hopefully special dickwad poncing Bolshy got covered in a bit of Brian juice and grows a baby Brian right in the middle of his forehead. Approximately where his common sense and compassion should be.
    Like @kezmusc I've reprimanded and even sacked a few of these individuals. I doubt it makes any difference to them, apart from a 'sharp sting' in the pocket (their egos are unassailable) but it makes you feel good. Maybe not as good as  watching them get chased through a field of rakes by a swarm of bees would feel, but you gotta take your pleasures where you can find them.
    Good luck with the poisoning, it's just another indignity to be endured, but at least there is a point to it.
    BTW, I think the best humour is usually black. Mxx
  • Nefertari
    Nefertari Member Posts: 288
    Good luck with the chemo Lois, Brian is going to get what he deserves.  I love your humour Dr ( I am God) Bolshy - still chuckling over that comment as I have met a few of them.
  • primek
    primek Member Posts: 5,392
    Yes you did make me laugh but also how bloody rude is Dr God delivering news with no bloody back up support or explanation at the time.
    FFS. Welcome to chemo club. At least grade 3 respond positively (as in the bastards die...that's a positive) and with every cell dying on the outside you can see (like hair follicles)...know Brian's friends are dying on the inside .
    Stay strong and keep on fighting and asking questions.

  • arpie
    arpie Member Posts: 7,667
    I had a 90+ year old lady just like your 'bedroom partner' in hospital once!  Kept singing 'Oh Danny Boy' (BADLY!) It was a shocker!  Ear Plugs didn't help!  :( 

    Fuckity Fuck indeed!  That's a bugger @LoisLois .... and good on you for getting up Dr Bolshy!!   That is disgraceful behaviour, specially in front of his underlings!! 

    Brian is in for one helluva scare now that the big guns will be brought out!!  

    Keep that sense of humour going - we have a wealth of info on the site here re chemo & the whole shebang - so whack up any queries that you may have now & during treatment.

    All the best for your ongoing treatment xxx
  • Sister
    Sister Member Posts: 4,960
    Nothing wrong with a sense of humour and some good visualisation.  Brian - your day is done; you're a hasbeen.  Seriously, though, that doctor needs the 2x4.  It doesn't matter how good he is at surgery, he is dealing with real people.  What about the women who don't have resilience?  If it's any consolation, I imagine his junior doctors hate him.