2nd AC treatment done and I am Struggling emotionally
Penny001
Member Posts: 19 ✭
would love to chat to anyone who has ideas when struggling emotionally. I feel trapped, bored, unmotivated, exhausted, limited and many other things im not sure how to pull myself out of it at the moment.
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Hi @Penny001 I felt so flat and couldn’t pull myself out. I knew it was a reaction to the chemo so just kept telling myself it was only short term for a long term gain. It didn’t make it easy but it made it bearable. I went for walks which I found cleared my headspace a lot. If you have a hobby throw yourself into it. Sending a big hug your way.1
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I think after a couple of treatments, the reality of it (whatever your reality is) steps in. If you can, try to find some routine that works for you. For me, the first few days were a write off, but after that I could start to do some things, usually in the morning when I had more energy - taking the kids to school, shopping, exercise, etc. Afternoons tended to be be catching up on Netflix.0
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As much as I hated to exercise and still do , I went for a walk , my husband went with me it was slow going and not too far the first couple of days , but eventually built it to 4 km then the next AC would hit and start again.
I finished Chemo 7 months ago ( 4 x AC and 12 Taxol ) and I still walk , and do some biking .
Just making little goals and achieving them is what got me through.( eg : today I went for a walk and made dinner)
Hang in there , but you will have bad days and good days .0 -
@Penny001
Oh dear it's a concern to read that you say you are bored. Not sure if you mean during chemo or in general because of. This link is a Breast Surgeon who became a patient
http://liz.oriordan.co.uk/blog/files/cope-with-chemo.html
If it's in general then perhaps you need a list. A list of things that need doing today/tomorrow as well as things you want to achieve in time be it immediate or after treatment. It's about stimulating the mind.
We sometimes read of others struggling and can't walk any further than the washing line in the backyard but set little goals and they conquer that washing line and venture to the front yard and beyond. Others take up a hobby they hadn't touched for years.
It's personal choice!
I'm house bound at present and will be for a few weeks yet. Me, I love my environment and time flies. Energy isn't there yet but I have an incomplete shawl and throw rug to get into eventually. A walk around the garden with hubby, the cat and Jonny Roo gladdens my heart. Hubby has taken on domestic chores and today made a Welsh teacake and a dozen individual quiches. Guess I'm fortunate that he's prepared to entertain me.
Wish you well in finding your mojo!
Take care0 -
@penny001 it can be terribly hard to do very little. There is a heavy emotional load to carry and when the physical trials of chemo kick in it can feel like it's all a bit too much.
Thing is, once we've committed to chemo we have to just plod through it. At one stage if I could have slept for 20 hours a day, seven days a week, for three months that would have been just fine with me. Wake me up when it's all over. I did try to walk every day and once you get used to feeling like shit you can get some stuff done.
My first chemo in 2006 was AC and I had very few problems. Looking back I think that trying to keep my job while being a single parent to a 13yo boy kept me focused on what I could do rather than what I couldn't. I won't say it was a doddle, but it wasn't as bad as I had imagined.
TC in 2016 was a different thing altogether. I was so bloody disappointed and sick that I wondered what the hell I was doing to myself. That was probably the longest 3 months of my life and I know exactly what you mean about feeling lost and disconnected. There is no magic solution, but some counselling can help, if only by giving you a chance to vent in an environment where no-one is going to throw your words back at you some time in the future. Hang in there. MXX4 -
I ended up with Netflix to keep me occupied.
I went to hydro pool week 2 and 3 to give me a purpose.
Some people do jigsaw puzzles.
Just think...you are halfway through. You can do it.2
