Confussed and scared

24

Comments

  • kmakm
    kmakm Member Posts: 7,974
    @Anjke Nine months on and I still find it hard to believe that this happened to me, that this is my life. It is indeed very surreal.
  • SoldierCrab
    SoldierCrab Member Posts: 3,445
    Bettyboo the info links I put up on this post earlier for Mantis will be good for you also.... 
    it might be better to have your own post about your diagnosis so people can answer you more directly 

  • SoldierCrab
    SoldierCrab Member Posts: 3,445
    @Giovanna_BCNA
    @Marianne_BCNA

    Could you put Bettyboo post up separately please? 

  • Bettyboo
    Bettyboo Member Posts: 33
    Thank you SoldierCrab, Im new here, so not sure of the protocols, my best wishes to Gal and Anjke also.
  • Flaneuse
    Flaneuse Member Posts: 899
    @Bettyboo Can you talk to your oncologist and ask him/her to explain again all the factors involved in your options? You need to understand the pros and cons before making decisions, and you have a right to straight answers from your care team. All the best. Fran 
  • Giovanna_BCNA
    Giovanna_BCNA Member Posts: 1,839
    Hello @SoldierCrab thanks for your post the thread has been split.
  • Gal
    Gal Member Posts: 27
    Hi everyone. I am not sure if this where I continue my chats. I am just over a week away from seeing my surgeon for the results of biopsy etc. I have been chatting to some really lovely ladies in my area, which has been comforting. I am okay while I am around people but on my own my brain goes into overdrive. I call it my Whirlpool washing machine never stops. Trying to stay positive but have my moments. I can't wait until the 18th, just for some direction. Can you try and read to much about different types of cancer when you are not sure what you are dealing with. I feel I have brain overload. Does anyone else feel like this. I guess that is silly question. Maybe what I should ask is how has everyone dealt with it. Sorry I am all over the place.   

  • kmakm
    kmakm Member Posts: 7,974
    edited September 2018
    Hi Gal. You can continue your discussion here, or start a new one, whatever you like. And there's no such thing as a silly question! 

    In my opinion you can definitely get information overload from reading about anything, let alone about your own diagnosis of cancer which renders us exquisitely vulnerable. At your stage too, when you're waiting on pathology results, and it's still unclear what direction your treatment will take, it's just too much. A lot of what you're reading about just won't apply. So, with respect, I say stop! Stick to your My Journey kit (have you got it yet?), and if you've got a particular question, ask a medical person or pop it on here.

    I always did better when distracted. Sounds like you've done well with that. Being distracted by the company of friends is marvellous.

    I am reasonably OK with staying away from Dr Google but every now and then I go down the rabbit hole... It sometimes requires a very conscious effort to stop. A deliberate "No, I'm not going to think about this anymore" is a strategy that is good to deploy. With purpose, turn your mind away from BC and onto something else. Planning a holiday you want to take, a craft project, redecorating, the book you want to write or a party you're going to plan. Anything at all that's not cancer!

    Hang in there. Big hug, K xox
  • Gal
    Gal Member Posts: 27
    Thank you Kmakm. Yes I do the markets as I make a bit of jewellery. I made myself go yesterday and ended up enjoying it. I have downloaded the My Journey kit and have been reading lots in it. Just need to get rid of the going to die syndrome. Crazy I know as breast cancer has come along way over the years and there are so many survival stories out there. Yes my partner has said for me to leave it alone for awhile and concentrate on doing something else. He has been fantastic support and will be coming along with me to see the surgeon. I am going for coffee tomorrow with a lady from a local breast cancer support group, looking forward to that. I live very near to the beach so maybe I will start my morning walks again. 
  • kmakm
    kmakm Member Posts: 7,974
    Do it! Exercise has been shown to benefit cancer treatment in many ways. You'll feel better for it.

    The 'I'm going to die syndrome' is a toughy. We all are obviously, it's just a matter of timing! A cancer diagnosis brings it all a lot closer, but statistically it's unlikely this will kill you. Try to breathe through it when it threatens to overwhelm you, and to put it out of your head as best as you can. This feeling will get better as well, but it takes a while.

    A lot of people told me to be positive, to stay positive, that it was key. People who barely know me (like a check out chick at Coles) and friends alike, and it drove me nuts. I'm happy to say not one medical person did. If you can be positive, it's wonderful and can smooth your path through treatment. However don't force it or beat yourself up if you can't. Psychologically it's healthier to go through your pain than avoid it. So cry, rage and howl at the moon if you need to. K xox
  • Gal
    Gal Member Posts: 27
    Kmakm do you know the difference between stage number and category number. Maybe someone else may be able to explain as well. Thank you

  • kmakm
    kmakm Member Posts: 7,974
    @Giovanna_BCNA Do you have a link to one of the BCNA info sheets to help @Gal understand this? Much better to come from you guys than an explanation from me!
  • Sister
    Sister Member Posts: 4,960
    Hi @Gal To repeat what @kmakm has said, yes you can read too much.  There are some good links around to help you understand what your report says but do remember, until you have your path report, nothing is going to be definitive.  Distraction is best if you can manage it but it is hard to do when breast cancer is front and centre of everything.  Personally, I found walking to be an excellent way of lowering the anxiety levels and clearing my head a bit.  Once you have some direction with treatment, things should become calm a bit.
  • Gal
    Gal Member Posts: 27
    Thanks everyone for the info much appreciated. Yes I am going to try and leave it alone  until I see the surgeon. To much guess work on my part. Just have to stay busy.
  • Beryl C.
    Beryl C. Member Posts: 270
    Gal Member - this is one of the most honest and supportive discussion sites I know. You mentioned shingles, I have had a few outbreaks over the years (since 1985) and its not funny - awful stabbing, sharp pains which always catch me by surprise. I have taken Lysine tablets or vitamin B6 and it does seem to keep an outbreak 'controlled, ie, less severe. I know you must feel overloaded with information and I think someone suggested 'one day at a time'. I knit, crochet, embroider and used to walk and swim to stop my mind going into over-drive. We must each find our own way and participating on this discussion list will help you to do that. xBeryl