Who me ?
Comments
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Oh Julie - what a prospect, I am thinking of you girl, good luck with all that.
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Wow - had a fab time ! The weather was kind to us, it was cold but not wet, a little windy but ok. I spent the first afternoon with my eldest son and his gf and then had dinner with them before the show which was excellent. The hotel was fine with a great breakfast included. My youngest son had a wonderful evening with some friends and then we spent yesterday at Scienceworks and then shopping ! He loved doing that too ! We found some very interesting shops - it's always fun in another city where there are shops you don't have at home. We had some nice food, we laughed a lot, it was an all round good time.
Wouldn't it be good if it was holidays all the time - I would love that. *sigh*
Back to the real world now. Oncologist and radiation set up next week. Wish me luck.
Keitha
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Oncologist wants to throw everything she has at me because of the HER2 positive.
Startng chemo next Tuesday plus Herceptin, radiation after the 6 weeks of chemo, with Herceptin for the year then endocrine therapy at some point (We'll discuss that later when this lot has sunk in ! she said)
I've had a good cry. I know that in the scheme of things I'm still a lucky bunny with a tiny tumour that for the moment has all been removed - but today I am once again very VERY frightened of the possibilities. I want to know and understand why this has happened, and I know that question has no answer. And the next one - will it happen again and will it kill me ? has no answer either. I know you all ask those too, I know some of you have a big YES for the last one and my heart is breaking for you. We humans can get to the moon, we have sent a craft out into deep space - but we can't find a cure for a disease that is KILLING US !!!!!
Not looking forward to losing my hair btw, it' s been looking really good lately, shit. Does it take long to grow back ? I really hope that the chemo doesn't give me headaches - I have just got on top of my migraines for the first time in years. Wouldn't that be ironic.
Sorry folks, self pitying rant over. I will put my positive hat back on.I might need a hat actually, not sure how I will look in a wig :P
I'm hanging in girls, thanks for the love.
Keitha
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Oncologist wants to throw everything she has at me because of the HER2 positive.
Startng chemo next Tuesday plus Herceptin, radiation after the 6 weeks of chemo, with Herceptin for the year then endocrine therapy at some point (We'll discuss that later when this lot has sunk in ! she said)
I've had a good cry. I know that in the scheme of things I'm still a lucky bunny with a tiny tumour that for the moment has all been removed - but today I am once again very VERY frightened of the possibilities. I want to know and understand why this has happened, and I know that question has no answer. And the next one - will it happen again and will it kill me ? has no answer either. I know you all ask those too, I know some of you have a big YES for the last one and my heart is breaking for you. We humans can get to the moon, we have sent a craft out into deep space - but we can't find a cure for a disease that is KILLING US !!!!!
Not looking forward to losing my hair btw, it' s been looking really good lately, shit. Does it take long to grow back ? I really hope that the chemo doesn't give me headaches - I have just got on top of my migraines for the first time in years. Wouldn't that be ironic.
Sorry folks, self pitying rant over. I will put my positive hat back on.I might need a hat actually, not sure how I will look in a wig :P
I'm hanging in girls, thanks for the love.
Keitha
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Hi Keitha
We have all had a cry.... me many... It's all part of this horrible nightmare we are all facing, to make us cry and ask those questions.
I suppose we are all lucky bunnies in some way or another. Atleast we have found our cancers and are now getting them treated. Just think that there are others out there that may have cancer and don't know it.... thats devastating.
We all hope that we never have the cancer return. And I hope no-one has it return.I keep you all in my thoughts.
Hope your chemo goes well next Tuesday. Will keep my fingers crossed. Hope you have a good recovery and mimimal side effects.
It's not fair that we must endure so much, have many questions and expect lots of answers.
The losing of the hair, sorry it happens to all of us. Just part of the unpleasantness ( hope I spelt it right) . But atleast when it does grow back, it will be beautiful. Can't wait for my time to come... to be able to ditch the hats, turbans and caps. Get a haircut and wash my hair.
Don't feel sorry, we all have those days and feelings. Atleast here we all know what you are talking about.
Keep smiling my honey. Love Julie XX
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Hi Keitha,
dont worry about getting upset that is all part of this shit journey. and as for losing your hair , i had really long blonde hair and it came back with a month after chemo black and really curly was weird its a grey brown now and just has a slight kink in it but i am just happy to have hair.
my 4yr old granddaughter Aaliyah asked me the other day "Oma why have you got grey in your hair ? i told her it's because i when i was sick and had my sore boobie i was given a pink lady medicine and thats why my hair is like it is now. she said " hmm i dont think i want that meciden, i told her i didn't want her to have it it's yuky. we both laughed and pulled yukky medicine faces.
there is an up side to all the yuk. we have good day's too.
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When I had my first bc diagnosis back in 2003 I went crazy with my research. I was 47 with no family history of bc,don't smoke/drink,eat fairly healthy,not fat etc etc. After reading so many books on cancer and talking with many women during my treatments there didn't seem to be an answer.I talked to all sorts of women with bc(tiny,Asian,European,young,middle aged,vegetarians,gym junkies ). The only common link was that we had all had 18mths or so of continued stress. This is my theory for the time being. Otherwise you could say that shit just happens!(my other theory!).So 7 years later I got it again,still EBC and now ,2yrs on, I'm fine.After Taxotere chemo it took 10wks before I saw any hair sprout.I didn't embrace being bald but merely put up with it -alot of whinging and pity parties! I got alot of my head stuff from www.headcovers.org -quite cheap and delivered to your door. I no longer question"why did I get bc?"I now concentrate on staying stress free,eating well and hopefully,exercising more. I sold my big house,quit my job and am alot happier.Now I'm not suggesting everyone do that but rather, make changes in your life to reduce stress. You have alot of treatment ahead of you and that can be daunting.Take one bit at a time and schedule in your fun days to look forward to.Chemo will be hard-won't sugar coat that one!But radiation,in comparision,will seem a breeze.I'm now on Tamoxifen and coping ok with it.You have great family support and ofcourse,us here so you'll get through it.Thinking of you,big hugs.
Tonya xx
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When I had my first bc diagnosis back in 2003 I went crazy with my research. I was 47 with no family history of bc,don't smoke/drink,eat fairly healthy,not fat etc etc. After reading so many books on cancer and talking with many women during my treatments there didn't seem to be an answer.I talked to all sorts of women with bc(tiny,Asian,European,young,middle aged,vegetarians,gym junkies ). The only common link was that we had all had 18mths or so of continued stress. This is my theory for the time being. Otherwise you could say that shit just happens!(my other theory!).So 7 years later I got it again,still EBC and now ,2yrs on, I'm fine.After Taxotere chemo it took 10wks before I saw any hair sprout.I didn't embrace being bald but merely put up with it -alot of whinging and pity parties! I got alot of my head stuff from www.headcovers.org -quite cheap and delivered to your door. I no longer question"why did I get bc?"I now concentrate on staying stress free,eating well and hopefully,exercising more. I sold my big house,quit my job and am alot happier.Now I'm not suggesting everyone do that but rather, make changes in your life to reduce stress. You have alot of treatment ahead of you and that can be daunting.Take one bit at a time and schedule in your fun days to look forward to.Chemo will be hard-won't sugar coat that one!But radiation,in comparision,will seem a breeze.I'm now on Tamoxifen and coping ok with it.You have great family support and ofcourse,us here so you'll get through it.Thinking of you,big hugs.
Tonya xx
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I can't imagine what it would be like without the Net. How do people manage ? I wouldn't survive without this support, I would go crazy.
Thanks for all your replies - I'm my old self again today. Positive hat on again. haha - going to need that !! Plenty of hats anyway !!! Luckily it's winter so woolly hats are right in - yayy !
How do you all feel about wigs ? I'm thinking that for my job (which I LOVE and hope to be able to keep doing - it's only casual and I can chose when/if to go which is fab) I might need to have hair. I'm a front of house person in a theatre and a concert hall - I am going to experiment with sleek black scarves so that might work.
Has anyone tried acupuncture for relaxation ? I have used it many times over the years for a range of problems and I wonder if it might be helpful for me. I will ask my onc what she thinks of course but would be happy to know if someone has had a good experience.
I'm ready for bad days but also trying to think positive thoughts too so that they're as good as they can be.
Moving forward - sooner I start the closer I am to the finish.
huge love
Keitha
I saw this on a HER2 support site and liked it right away:
Said Christopher Robin to Pooh: "You must remember this: You're braver than you believe and stronger than you seem and smarter than you think"
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I can't imagine what it would be like without the Net. How do people manage ? I wouldn't survive without this support, I would go crazy.
Thanks for all your replies - I'm my old self again today. Positive hat on again. haha - going to need that !! Plenty of hats anyway !!! Luckily it's winter so woolly hats are right in - yayy !
How do you all feel about wigs ? I'm thinking that for my job (which I LOVE and hope to be able to keep doing - it's only casual and I can chose when/if to go which is fab) I might need to have hair. I'm a front of house person in a theatre and a concert hall - I am going to experiment with sleek black scarves so that might work.
Has anyone tried acupuncture for relaxation ? I have used it many times over the years for a range of problems and I wonder if it might be helpful for me. I will ask my onc what she thinks of course but would be happy to know if someone has had a good experience.
I'm ready for bad days but also trying to think positive thoughts too so that they're as good as they can be.
Moving forward - sooner I start the closer I am to the finish.
huge love
Keitha
I saw this on a HER2 support site and liked it right away:
Said Christopher Robin to Pooh: "You must remember this: You're braver than you believe and stronger than you seem and smarter than you think"
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Hi Keitha, I am sorry to hear that you do need chemo and will lose your hair. This time last year I was completely bald, having finished chemo at the end of March. It took awhile to grow back, but by the end of September I had enough coverage to go out uncovered. Last week I had my 7th haircut. It has grown back curly and not as grey as I thought it would be. I am colouring it again, and my curles are still bouncy. I have never had curly hair before, unless I permed it. My curls could last for another 12 months. I used to wear a selection of different head gear, but after a few months wore a wig mostly. I found an excellent wig which looked very normal ( check out my profile photo ). Also, my daughter, (22 at the time), said that she could almost forget that I had cancer when I wore my wig, because it was so good. That comment made me more inclined to wear the wig as it made others feel better. Good luck with your chemo. I was one of the lucky ones, who had very minimal side effects from chemo, so not everyone gets knocked about badly from the drugs. I hope you will be one of them. Love Chris xx0
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Any day that has a Winne the Pooh quote in it is a good one!
Glad you're having a better day Keitha.
Di
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Thanks Chris, good to hear your chemo experience wasn't totally awful. I'll work with that !! I am going to have a look at myself in wigs, and a dear friend who is a designer is going to make me some special headgear ! So I'll be well covered whatever I choose.
If you hadn't said your pic was a wig I wouldn't have known !
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Di,
Indeed, Winnie often has just the right thoughts when we need him.
love
Keitha
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Hi Coco & Dan, welcome to my blog - more than happy to have you along. I get so much from reading other stories and from sharing my fears too Coco, it helps A LOT !!!!
Today was ok - I was working so that always helps to make the day go fast. A few down moments when I think about the what ifs and my tummy stars churning again, but nothing I can do to stop that right now. It's all a waiting game until I know how the chemo is going to affect me. Once the first one is under my belt I will be able to face the others with some sort of plan. bit like childbirth isn't it ? You can read all the books and listen to all the stories but until it's actually happening to YOU it is impossible to really imagine or understand. I am psyching myself into having a good experience with minimal side effects.
I wish I was younger Dan, then I wuld go for multiple fun wigs too, but I'm too old. (Yes I am !!! I'm not being precious - my job needs serious elegance) I will give it a try if I can find one that looks like my own hair, but otherwise I'm ok with scarves and wraps, I don't mind if people know why, maybe if more do they'll go and have mammograms and donate to research.
God luck to both of you with your treatment - and do keep positive, there's truly no point to anything else. If you like reading, have a go at The Power of Now. It's a very strong powerful book I'm working my way through. Yu don't have to be religious, but you can be if you want - it works either way.
loads of love
Keitha
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Hi Coco & Dan, welcome to my blog - more than happy to have you along. I get so much from reading other stories and from sharing my fears too Coco, it helps A LOT !!!!
Today was ok - I was working so that always helps to make the day go fast. A few down moments when I think about the what ifs and my tummy stars churning again, but nothing I can do to stop that right now. It's all a waiting game until I know how the chemo is going to affect me. Once the first one is under my belt I will be able to face the others with some sort of plan. bit like childbirth isn't it ? You can read all the books and listen to all the stories but until it's actually happening to YOU it is impossible to really imagine or understand. I am psyching myself into having a good experience with minimal side effects.
I wish I was younger Dan, then I wuld go for multiple fun wigs too, but I'm too old. (Yes I am !!! I'm not being precious - my job needs serious elegance) I will give it a try if I can find one that looks like my own hair, but otherwise I'm ok with scarves and wraps, I don't mind if people know why, maybe if more do they'll go and have mammograms and donate to research.
God luck to both of you with your treatment - and do keep positive, there's truly no point to anything else. If you like reading, have a go at The Power of Now. It's a very strong powerful book I'm working my way through. Yu don't have to be religious, but you can be if you want - it works either way.
loads of love
Keitha
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Hi Keitha
I managed to get a wig that look like it could be my own hair it looks so good my husband want me to get my hair cut like it when it grows back... but I find it uncomfortable... I would recommend you wait till you are a 'nude nutt' before looking...and if you can do a 'look good.. feel good' workshop and try different styles. At the workshop I went to I tried a red wig.. felt great and I loved the way I looked but because I already had a wig didn't get it... I did however try a turban/head cover called a 'Byron Bay'... soooooooo comfortable. I now wear it all the time. So it's worth trying different things...
good luck and have fun trying...
Trina
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