Any regrets after going flat?

Ausmum2

Hello ladies, I’m just catching up with this one. 

I’m a recent flattie as @Abbydog knows. 

Here’s a couple of things (other than a BC survivor who told me about her neck and back problems after years of being single boobed that lead her to make a change) that I thought about.
I couldn’t figure out how I’d manage one DD size boob and one flat-
managing two had been a clothing challenge. 

I thought about the joy of never “having to” wear a bra again (this still makes me smile everyday). 

I thought about being able to have the cute little lacy bits if I wanted them (rather than needing super-solder Boulder holders). I went and looked at them and bought myself two little flimsy bits with a bit of padding (gives me a nice probably large A, small . But I haven’t worn them much, yet as it’s been jumper weather. But they are there for the dresses etc I have that fall better with a bit of a bump. 

I started a bank account and I’ve “purposely re-purposed” the money I used to have to spend on expensive bras and swimsuits etc to hold the girls in. It’s my “frivolous” fund. It’s for the things you’ve denied as they were frivolous/expensive/unnecessary vs bras/swimsuits etc. To have and do and not feel guilty about. 

So, so far, life as a flattie is something I’m finding absolutely liberating! 

And my husband has been a rockstar about it and I’m grateful that he never ever questioned my decision in this. 

Many hugs for this making tough decisions here. 

 

TonyaM

Thanks @Ausmum2 for your input. It all helps us lopsided girls in our decision making.xx

StarGirl

@Abbydog, your comment sounds kind of judgmental. I never said I hadn’t tried going down the prosthetic route. It’s not always as easy as you might think. Just as not everyone can have a reconstruction. Being told it wasn’t possible after I’d already had the mastectomy was disappointing to say the least. It’s not always a matter of choice. 

Abbydog

Dear StarGirl,
I never meant to upset you.
I may have misunderstood. I took it that you hadn't been offered or tried a prosthesis.
I have one and rather dislike it. Sometimes I hate it. It swings around to the side with the remaining breast.
In public I wear it. But almost never at home. 
That was why I started this post. I'm seriously considering going flat. 
I am sorry.

StarGirl

@Abbydog, it’s okay. Wishing you all the best whatever you decide. 

LoisLois

One word - BLISS!  The freedom and happiness is fantastic. 
No regrets at all. 
 
   

Abbydog

Dear LoisLois,
Did you go flat at the beginning on advice? Or was it your choice later. Are you considering any reconstruction, even later? Probably the only thing working me is a larger tummy. I probably would wear a bra with some filling leaving to her house. 

I should lose some weight, but that never seems easy. 

TonyaM

Hi @Abbydog,
They say you should lose some weight prior fat grafting.If you lose it afterwards then your’mounds’ from fat grafting shrink too.But it’s soooo hard to shift the kilos. I can lose a few on the 5:2 diet but then it plateaus and I give up.But we really need to shape up abit before taking on more surgery 

Abbydog

That sounds true. Maybe a another incentive to lose weight now. I haven’t  been promised large mounds, wouldn’t want to have them shrink any extra. 

Thank you. TonyaM

Caz1

Hi @Abbydog I’m in the same boat as you! Recon cancelled due to covid so a year on I am really on the fence about flat vs recon.
I am leaning into flat at the moment, for the same reasons as you.  Still not 100% certain though.....especially when the medical profession seems to favour recon 
Caz xxx

Abbydog

So I’m not the only one. It’s nice to hear from you

kmcin28

I haven't visited this forum for a few years now. In 2017 I had my right breast and lymph nodes removed due to stage 3 cancer. I have recently been thinking of getting my left breast removed. I'm looking for advice on how to go about this. I'm still having yearly mammograms and visits to the oncologist, no further signs of cancer. Do I now just go to my gp and get a referral to a surgeon or is it more complex than that. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Thank you.

arpie

Hi @kmcin28 - I can fully understand your wish and hope you don't find too many hurdles to jump over!

I think there was a conversation about preventative mastectomy fairly recently - but the 'search' doesn't come up with the most recent posts first!   grrr.  Here is one from a few years ago tho that may help ..... 

https://onlinenetwork.bcna.org.au/discussion/comment/134541#Comment_134541

All the best xx

Abbydog

Dear kmcin28,
When my mind is definitely made up, I plan to go back to my breast surgeon.
He is still seeing me for follow ups. I had mine done as a Private patient.
If you were in the public system, I think your GP would be the starting point. 
Or ask your Oncologist next visit. Best wishes

kmcin28

Thank you @Abbydog and @arpie. I tried the search and this thread seemed to be as close to what I was looking for. @Abbydog I was a private patient, my surgeon who was very good is in the regional town where we lived, have since moved to Brisbane so new GP but same Oncologist he is based here. I am a bit concerned with consulting him, I brought it up when I had my first surgery and he asked me why I would want to do that, didn't push it at the time as I was trying to get my head around chemo and all the stress that goes with that. I also suffer from anxiety that gets worse waiting for mammogram results. I was also wondering if I went ahead would it be classed as cosmetic surgery.