Night Howls
Comments
-
@AllyJay @kmakm @Sister I hate the fucking J word. I am not on a cruise, a holiday or going any place GOOD! I know, they use it as a verb - the time taken - but it still shits me. It sounds too 'nice'. Like everyone is going to come out better at the other end of this and that's just not realistic.2
-
This is what I think of this fuckin' journey. Up yours!
5 -
Sorry...woken up a bit cranky and angry this morning......seems like I feel like this more and more now. People warned me that after active treatment I might fall apart emotionally, I didn't get any warnings about this anger. I need to book in to see Aileen my counsellor. God I love this group....I have self assessed and made a plan just by writing here. Had I not got on here this morning I would not have been so self-reflective and proactive.3
-
-
Well as I was awake I got up and yelled at them this morning for shit and giggles
had one who couldn’t find his tie - told him to look in his wash basket nah mum it’s not there dad goes look and Lordy me where is his tie? Launch lecture about if you only got your shit ready the night before. Youngest who has no concept of time says he doesn’t want to be yelled at but then does everything to engage that response. Snarling bitch face daughter whose mantra is I’m so tired (join the fucking club sweetheart) finally got her shit together and out the door as well.
It is more their non participation in the house that is shitting me, neglect of basic hygiene matters seriously how much harder is it to scrape your plate and put it in the dishwasher than leave it on the bench and all the micro things (empty shampoo bottles in the bathroom) that are making me crazier than normal. Lists don’t work because apparently they are optional and there is so much score keeping about who did what going on (very selective too I might add) that they are driving me crazy.
Small goal for today - go up the street! Which is actually huge cause I will have a shower etc2 -
@Kiwi Angel Found some useful info about medication to help with menopause symptoms here:
https://www.thewomens.org.au/health-information/menopause-information/managing-menopause/#Non-hormonal medications
1 -
Hey @Sarnicad,
He he I feel your pain. And mine are all old enough to know better. Just last week I put a great big not on the kitchen bench (which is where everyone puts their plates and it is right above the dishwasher) that says "The dishwasher is not far away") Nope dishes went on the sign! OMFG.
In the bathroom I put a sign that says "Cleaning up after yourself will not cause brain damage" Nope. That one didn't work either. Am going to add swear words and see if that makes a difference.
Weird how after your family realises you are probably not going to drop off the perch any time soon they go straight back to their old shitty habits.
Hope your day gets better.1 -
@Sarnicad My experience of this was similar. My husband losing it at the kids was very stressful. Pick a moment when he's relaxed and explain to him specifically what you need, what the best things to help you are. The chaos may very well be a reflection of everyone's distress and uncertainty. If you are absolutely clear with everyone, it may help.
Can you call a family meeting? Use the talking spoon (no one is allowed to speak unless they're holding the wooden spoon) so everyone gets an orderly say? Say something like 'now I know what chemo is like, this is what I need to make it easier and better for me' and spell out the tidiness and behaviour standards you expect.
If necessary, draw up a roster. Sometimes if the rules are up on the fridge in black and white, that helps. Incentivise! Completion of your chore gets a Freddo Frog or jelly snake, or a dollar. Chocolate motivates in my house and my kids are 18, 15, 12 and 10.
Have you got friends offering to help? If so, say 'yes, I'd love some help in the house'. I had a very busy friend (a high school principal with three teens of her own) who'd pop in every now and then and just quietly hit the sink to do the washing up, sweep the kitchen floor or the balcony, and pop on a load of washing. She'd pour my father-in-law a glass of wine, one for herself, have a chat, a laugh, and then be on her way.
This problem comes up here quite often. It seems like once families understand, and know what they're required to do, they get on board. And the kids are often better for it afterwards.
Hang in there! K xox4 -
@JJ70 Love your anger darl! No need to apologise, to me anyway. I feel ya
@Kiwi Angel Could be. Ask your onc next time. I'm interested to know.
@kezmusc I despair of the dishes in the dishwasher scenario. Ours is right next to the sink. Rinsing and loading requires no further foot movement, only a pivot. Garrrgh! And the dishes and food rubbish in the bedrooms... I've taken to piling it on their unmade beds to make the point. That's been known to work.0 -
I know right? Same same, mine is right under the bench where they put it. Bend down, open the door aaagggh! And don't talk to me about leaving your dirty laundry right where you step out of it or the amount of empty shampoo bottles in the shower. Sometimes I boycott it and ignore it for a while until you have to kick them out of the way and dodge the old razors just to get under the water.
Can't wait till they have their own places. I'm going over, trashing the joint and then going home!........ha ha ha....the joys.1 -
Just got back from my physio and my chemo lymphodema arm swelling has subsided even more
. Doing happy dance 8 -
@Kiwi Angel Hooray!0
