Have the blues hit this site?

2

Comments

  • kmakm
    kmakm Member Posts: 7,974
    edited July 2018
    That is SO good to hear!! I'm thrilled for you. Hope you can manage some of those scrumptious fish & chips. K xox


  • kmakm
    kmakm Member Posts: 7,974
    Most excellent to hear @Kiwi Angel:) K xox
  • kmakm
    kmakm Member Posts: 7,974
    Enjoy your fishing @arpie. Hope they're biting! K xox
  • Sister
    Sister Member Posts: 4,961
    Only if my brother-in-law drops some whiting in @kmakm!
  • Eastmum
    Eastmum Member Posts: 495
    I wish more people would give themselves permission to feel crappy.

    I think there's so much pressure to be 'the strong one' or 'the positive one'.

    I'm actually one of those horrendously annoying positive people - even my blood group is B+! I constantly drive my kids crazy with some sort of 'make lemonade' phrase and I am incredibly fortunate that so far, I haven't been doing too badly throughout this breast cancer process - but I have totally had it with people telling me how 'amazing' I am  - simply because I've been fortunate enough to continue working and living life as normal - and I keep thinking how damaging it is for people who are blue and struggling, to always hear about how 'amazing' someone is. 

    There's so much pressure to appear to be that 'amazing' person to the outside world. And that's why I think so many people feel that they need to show a different face to the outside world, than they feel inside. It's the same with any form of depression, anxiety or fear. The tide isn't really turning fast enough.

    I am absolutely not any more amazing in any way, shape or form than anyone else that is going through this - in fact, I am way way less amazing, simply because I haven't had it so tough. The truly 'amazing' people are the many of you who struggle to get out of bed each day and somehow find the strength to still do it. 

    It's absolutely OK to be struggling, it's OK to be blue and it's OK to have low spirits - it's so normal! The most important thing is that if you find yourself sinking into the depths then you acknowledge it, and give yourself permission to feel that way. Then, when you're ready, to find whatever it is that works for you to gradually bring yourself into the light - however long it takes is fine.

    To echo @arpie and @kezmusc - the light is there, sometimes it's just a little harder to see - and this forum is an absolute godsend  - it's absolutely awesome to see how honest people are on their posts - it really helps so many people.
  • [Deleted User]
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  • Kiwi Angel
    Kiwi Angel Member Posts: 1,952
    @eastmum - I got, and still continue to get the amazing thing - how I worked, mainly looked after myself and never complained.  It almost makes you feel like you have to continue doing that as that is what people now expect of you.  In saying that though I told my hubby the other week how down I was feeling and he was very supportive.  I was fine all the way through surgeries and then chemo but I think once its all over you actually have the chance to reflect and realise all you have been through.
  • kmakm
    kmakm Member Posts: 7,974
    @Kiwi Angel The processing time required for this ordeal is lengthy...
  • Kiwi Angel
    Kiwi Angel Member Posts: 1,952

    @Kmakm - was supposed to ring the shrink again today but left my diary and paperwork at home - Im playing the chemo brain thing as long as I can - then Ill blame the Tamoxifen ;-).

    Apparently a large amount of women come through the experience with PTSD which does not surprise me.

  • Eastmum
    Eastmum Member Posts: 495
    @Kiwi Angel - yep this pressure to be 'amazing' is so damaging. It's great that we can be open with our families - and I think that the more people who stand up and say 'I'm not doing so well but I'm still powering on' - the easier it will be for many people. Having said that, if my ability to continue to work and live life as normal is inspiring to anyone, then I am incredibly humbled by that. xxx
  • kmakm
    kmakm Member Posts: 7,974
    @Kiwi Angel Just tried to make an appointment to see my psych but there's no one on the phones at the breast clinic...



    She told me there are a couple of studies being done on the psychological similarities between PTSD and a diagnosis of BC. Extremely similar apparently, the thinking being they may be able to use some of the PTSD treatments in the BC setting.
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  • Kiwi Angel
    Kiwi Angel Member Posts: 1,952

    @kmakm very interesting.  Ill have to try and find a chance to ring tomorrow. 


    @Eastmum - I feel the same way - being able to keep working made me feel better I didn't do it for anyone else but if someone out there sees that it is possible for some people to work through chemo then Im happy about.  Sometimes I don't want to be amazing - it was to be whiny, whingy and curl up in a little ball.

  • onemargie
    onemargie Member Posts: 1,264
    @sister. I have memories as a child of a few mouse plagues in South Australia. Bloody things get into everything don’t they!  Lovely pics too. Hope your enjoying your stay at the shack. Where abouts are you.??   Margie xx