Funny rant for today

Ro10
Ro10 Member Posts: 59
edited November 2016 in Day to day
So I went to a new fitness class this morning which was called "gentle exercise" and is generally aimed at older people or people with beginner level fitness. It's the first outing I've had wearing a head scarf and we all got talking about breast cancer and chemo. Everyone was really lovely except this one grumpy old lady. She asked how my chemo was going and how I had been feeling. I said I'd been feeling quite good and energetic and she responded with "well that's not going to last - you'll just get worse as you go along. My husband had chemo 6 months ago and he still feels awful." We were talking about support groups and I said I had joined an online forum and she responded with "oh don't do that, that's the worst thing you can do. All those sick people will just make you feel awful!" This is coming from a person who's never actually had cancer and chemo so has absolutely no idea what's it's like. I just smiled and nodded, laughing to myself on the inside about what a depressing person she would be to have around. I'm under no illusions that the chemo is going to be easy and there is a possibility that I will feel worse after each one but I don't need her to remind me of that! Rant over! :s
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Comments

  • ccasper
    ccasper Dragonfly Posts: 190
    Don't even listen to her. Everyone knows someone who has been through something. Somehow I don't think her husband was a generally healthy 34 year old woman. Everyone is so different. 

    I have been feeling generally really really well since starting carbo and taxol in comparison to AC which just made me really tired but felt ok. So just nod and smile and keep turning up to show her how you are going! Haha
  • iserbrown
    iserbrown Member Posts: 5,766
    Armchair expert! She's a real charmer - lucky you were able to smile through it!
  • Ann-Marie
    Ann-Marie Member Posts: 1,113
    How did you go with the class? @Ro10
  • submarine
    submarine Member Posts: 14
    Clearly she helped you more than the sick people from the online group!! ;)
    I guess we have to learn to laugh at people's reactions!
    And as bad as chemo can get, keeping a positive mind helps a lot making it all more bearable!
  • Ro10
    Ro10 Member Posts: 59
    @Ann-Marie_BCNA I really enjoyed the class. It's run by one of my friends who is a PT and runs different types of classes like Pilates and low to high intensity classes. You can change the intensity of the classes depending on your fitness level which is good. I think exercising is making a big difference to how I have been feeling and I intend to keep going to the classes through my chemo.
  • Ann-Marie
    Ann-Marie Member Posts: 1,113
    Fantastic :) so good to hear. 
  • SusieQ2
    SusieQ2 Member Posts: 26
    You are inspiring for even getting to an exercise class during chemo treatment, Ro10! 

    Keep up the great work and just let negative comments like that wash over you ... and then share them with us so we can all have a chuckle :)
  • ccasper
    ccasper Dragonfly Posts: 190
    Glad you enjoyed it @Ro10 I went to the gym this morning too. No cranky ladies though haha
  • Afraser
    Afraser Member Posts: 4,450

     I know it's the other side of the coin but sometimes the idea that a person who's never actually had cancer and chemo has absolutely no idea what's it's like can be hard on the non-cancer- sufferer, who may be dealing with a depressed, unhappy, complaining and hard to comfort partner.  My beloved had very early bowel cancer detected, good prognosis, opted for a course of chemo to be doubly sure he was doing everything possible, sensible man. But he obviously felt I had no idea what he was going through! What he described as my fortitude going through my treatment sort of became a lack of empathy about his. I really was sympathetic, particularly to the degree of fatigue he experienced (which I didn't) but he kept all his body parts, and didn't lose his hair, tastebuds, feeling in his feet or get lymphoedema or a heart condition!! Everyone reacts differently and all of us, at one time or another, craves sympathy. So while the cranky lady's comments were certainly unhelpful, she too may have been venting!  And yes, laughter is the best response!

  • Gerryb
    Gerryb Member Posts: 106
    @Ro10 take a lollypop to the next session and tell her to suck it!!
  • Hopes_and_Dreams
    Hopes_and_Dreams Member Posts: 760
    Love your attitude Ro10!  When I get grumpy and unpleasant customers at work I just tell myself that I have them in my life for 5 minutes and some unfortunate soul has to live with them all the time!  Sometimes smiling and a positive attitude is the best way to get even :) 
  • rowdy
    rowdy Member Posts: 1,165
    I'm impressed you are going to exercise during chemo. I strugggled to get out of bed some days. I worked on and off during chemo and found that it helped me to think about something else. So for me after work I struggled more. Keep going research shows it helps with side effects. Smilng does help
  • Ro10
    Ro10 Member Posts: 59
    Thanks for all your comments. I thought you ladies might get a giggle out it it. Regarding the exercise thing, I figure I should try and exercise on the days that I feel ok because there are some days that I don't have the energy. I've only had one round of AC so there is a chance I won't feel this good as I progress but I'm crossing my fingers that this feeling will last! I'm also taking a heap of supplements from my naturopath which might be helping with the side effects. 
  • Ne
    Ne Member Posts: 336
    So glad I joined this forum of "sick people" cause if it wasn't for them, I'd already jumped off Story Bridge!  I have had more support, comfort and guidance from the wonderful people that makes up this forum than anyone else in my life.  What a wealth of information and love and care we get here.  She obviously doesn't know the difference between a forum like this and just the 'internet' in general.  Yes, we stay off the internet cause horrifying stories and photos scares us, but this forum isn't that at all.  Reminds me of my mum (bless her) who when Facebbook came out years ago and I joined told me it was the biggest waste of time and that anyone joinging a 'group' like that where everyone knows their business must me nuts!  She gave me the 3rd degree about it and said she would never ever join FB....fwd 9 years and you can not seperate mum from her phone or her facebook page she has since created.  She loves sharing art, craft, recipes and photos of the grandchildren and her and dad's holidays etc.  I know we all are getting older, we need to be mindful that things will change for us and our kids too and we will have to educate ourselves on things too before we judge others.

    @Cosette_BCNA your comment cracked me up :smiley: