Where did my gratitude go? I swear I left it right here somewhere...

Hi everyone
i am hanging in here as best I can, I wish these nightmare emotions and hopelessness and repeating horror movie thoughts would bloody STOP but I’m hanging in here. I talked to the beautiful Giovanna today. And I want to tell you all that I honestly feel so supported by your care and love that if I try to write back to the messages and posts I start bawling and can’t even handle it - in such a raw black space that anything sets me off. But I will talk when I can. Hearing from you all has helped me stay alive. x o x o