@onemargie
What a post. You have expressed it all so well. I will take the time to write out your post in my journal so that when I "slip" I can go back and reread it. An inspirational piece.
@kmakm my emotional recovery has taken a year. There is still the fear, still the teary moments and still the angry moments. However they are not as overwhelming. I still have those "f**k I had breast cancer" moments and not a day goes by where I do not think about BC.
There was a time when I refused to drive to Broome from Derby for a shopping / lunch outing with husband or friends because it brought back all the trauma of having to fly down to Perth for treatment. So many bad memories. A week ago I had to fly to Perth for my first 12 month scans. I breezed through the airport - and that's when I realised that I was getting better emotionally.
It was better when we flew back into Broome and started the 3 hour drive home. I began to relax getting closer to home. The red dirt, the boab trees, the blueness of the sky and the space around us I "felt" home and I realised how settled I am.
I too once read that psychological studies show that 50% of women with breast cancer have some ptsd but only about a quarter of those women seek help of some kind. That's a lot of hurting, confused and distressed women. I was lucky - my gp recognised my distressed state. She prescribed "happy pills". Normally I would have refused them, gone out and chucked another boab nut at old man boab tree. This time, even my lonely little fogged brain cell recognised that I needed some enhancing help. It took a while - over 10 months for me to realise "It is what it is" (my new mantra). I have done all I can.
It does take time. The experienced hands on this site who kept posting that things will get better were my comfort.
BCNA forum site is my sanity site.
