You've pretty much described how I've been feeling all week. There's no spark, no joy. I just can't see the point. I feel sad at a deep soul level. I'm faking almost every interaction I have. It's two months since my double mastectomy & recon, and three and a half since chemo. I feel so, so tired. My body aches, my sleep is constantly broken and I'm struggling to find motivation. I knew this time was going to be difficult for me so I made a list of things that could help me through. I stare at that list now and think how can I possibly make this work? It's the school holidays and I'm on full time kid patrol. I've got the energy to do about one thing a day on top of the necessary cooking & housework. And that almost always goes to a child.
It's not entirely bleak. I like to see a few friends, tv shows can make me laugh, and there are some things on the horizon that I'm looking forward to. But day to day, most of the time I am dull and flat. I feel like I've had the stuffing knocked out of me. The stuffing that was 'me' has gone.
So yes @"Summer Prevails", I can relate.
