Yes, the waiting is awful but it has nothing to do with hope or lack of hope. I was diagnosed in June and had masectomy early Dec. Try to avoid 'reading' to much into dates, times etc, that is, avoid over thinking which someone has already mentioned. Stay in touch with this forum, reading old posts gave me a sense of belonging to an on-going community. I told myself that I was not going to let anxiety and worry steal away my day! I did phone the BCNA help line and the conversation settled me down. The roller coaster ride that is BC is best endured with laughter, determination, tears, sprinkle of anger etc etc. Stay in touch! xxxxxxxx