No, I am afraid it's rarely easy. And I appreciate your courage in sharing your feelings. Cancer and depression have a lot in common - they are frequently experienced but no-one unaffected much likes talking about either! I discovered when my mother was felled with depression that almost everyone I knew had a story - their own or family or friend - about an encounter with depression. Same with cancer. The more we talk, the more the matter stops being weirdly secret - they are illnesses, not failings. Good luck with your treatment.