Hi Everyone. This is my first post. I am trying to navigate this network, because I know I need help. I was diagnosed with metastatic breast cancer only 5 days ago. I have many tests coming up, and treatment options. But for now, I can't seem to find the strength. I just need to hear some positive stories, some good stories, some hopeful stories, so that I can muster enough determination to stop crying for one thing, and to get my anxiety level down. I have an amazing family, and they also need some hope. I am 56, and was originally diagnosed 13 years ago with early breast cancer, and was told "you are cured"???? I am sorry to sound so desperate, but I'm still in that place where my world feels like it's ending. Thank you for reading, and I send hugs to everyone.

Jacqui64 Hi, Yes I have always been a planner too, but when I was suddenly diagnosed everything changed. I decided to not look to far ahead, take it a day at a time, and for once in my life I have put myself first and I feel good about that. I feel so good that I have friends here that I can ask questions and not feel uncomfortable about it. Discussing it with others that are going through it and can give you the information that will help get us through. Its amazing. I am very lucky that I have an amazing husband who is so supportive and I know I can lean on him when needed. Sending you lots of hugs xx Cheryl

Hi @Jacqui64. I love that you went for a 7km walk! That's the kind of thing I do.I am not in your position but from this forum I know that some people live with Stage 4 for a very long time. You could just about say indefinitely for some.You'll know from last time that this great shock will pass. Yes, there'll be treatments but what else? Make some plans, make some memories. What would you like to do? Book it, make it, plan it, trek it, throw it (party or ball!), paint it, breathe it. You are not your cancer. You will always be more than your illness.It's truly f****d Jacqui so you bloody get to cry as much as you want. I'm sending you the biggest of hugs. One of those long enveloping ones that releases oxytocin and ends up with us giggling as you've snotted on my shoulder and I've cracked a lame joke about it. Hang in there lovely, hang in there. K xox

Hi Jacqui64,I responded to your other post about Kisqali but thought I'd pop in here to let you know a little about myself which should help a little as I know how much comfort I took from the ladies in this group! I was diagnosed at the end of 2018 at 40, after having early breast cancer in 2016. I was diagnosed stage 4 with bone mets and was lucky that I kept saying I felt a little unwell, like constant nausea, almost like a hangover or morning sickness. That was literally my only symptoms. I was diagnosed just before xmas, & was convinced my life would be over and I'd be organising a funeral and people to care for my 2 teens before the following xmas! Happy to say that nearly 2 years down the track, I'm still working part time(haven't been full time since before kids), am a single mum to 2 very busy teens who I ferry around constantly and am generally doing really well. Haven't really used this year, so I'm not counting myself as ageing this year, as I'm in lockdown metro melb. Yes, it is totally shit and I do have some really shitty days where I just want to crawl up under the doona and not come out, but those days are very few and far between now and I just get on with living the best life I can for the sake of myself and my kids as well as my extended family and friends who are my biggest supporters. The thing that I've found the hardest is accepting help, but I am learning to accept it when I need it and say yes to things when offered. I'm also better at saying no to things if I'm tired or it doesn't interest me enough to give up time with my kids or something. This might sound selfish, but if I'm going to be tired after attending something that I don't really want to go to, and that in turn affects my kids, I just don't do it!! Others will probably be able to explain that more eloquently than me, and yes it is late at night so probably not my best time to be typing. Sending you much love, and yes there are many of us living well with mets!! Feel free to shoot me any questions, happy to help any way I can!!!

Dear @Jacqui64 You’re still in shock - this is never the news anyone wants, especially when you thought you had left breast cancer far behind you. The world hasn’t ended but you have good reasons to find it hard to accept that. As days go by, and tests are done, and treatments proposed, you will gradually accept that the world (bit weird as it is) is still there, you are still part of it and can be for a long time to come. You just need to let your brain and body yell and shout a bit, first. Many others here on the network know first hand what you are going through and I am sure will send their stories to assist. Hope is always there, it just needs a bit of searching to locate it sometimes. Best wishes.

Afraser said: Dear @Jacqui64 You’re still in shock - this is never the news anyone wants, especially when you thought you had left breast cancer far behind you. The world hasn’t ended but you have good reasons to find it hard to accept that. As days go by, and tests are done, and treatments proposed, you will gradually accept that the world (bit weird as it is) is still there, you are still part of it and can be for a long time to come. You just need to let your brain and body yell and shout a bit, first. Many others here on the network know first hand what you are going through and I am sure will send their stories to assist. Hope is always there, it just needs a bit of searching to locate it sometimes. Best wishes. Thank you so very much for your message. This has really resonated with me, and helped me to realise that I'm not losing my mind. Every now and then I can think clearly about it, and then the tears come. Today I walked for 7kms, to prove to myself that I am stronger than I think. Thank you, from me and my children, who read your message. xx

Newly diagnosed - Just need some positivity and hope

Jacqui64
Member
5 years ago

MicheleR said:

Hi @Jacqui64,

I am so sorry to hear about your recent troubles. Sending you a virtual hug. X

Thank you so much for your thoughtfulness. I send a huge hug back to you. x
jennyss
Member
5 years ago

Dear @Jacqui64

and best wishes from jennyss in Western NSW
Beryl_C_
Member
5 years ago
hello @Jacqui64 - to use a sporting term, this 'hits you for six!'. Diagnosed nine years ago I can remember feeling as though the world had tilted on its axis. Afraser is right, you are still in shock, remember all feelings are ok. Stay connected, this is a very safe place to tell it as it is for you. Hugs.
Afraser
Member
5 years ago
Dear @Jacqui64
You’re still in shock - this is never the news anyone wants, especially when you thought you had left breast cancer far behind you. The world hasn’t ended but you have good reasons to find it hard to accept that. As days go by, and tests are done, and treatments proposed, you will gradually accept that the world (bit weird as it is) is still there, you are still part of it and can be for a long time to come. You just need to let your brain and body yell and shout a bit, first. Many others here on the network know first hand what you are going through and I am sure will send their stories to assist. Hope is always there, it just needs a bit of searching to locate it sometimes. Best wishes.
MicheleR
Member
5 years ago
Hi @Jacqui64,

I am so sorry to hear about your recent troubles. Sending you a virtual hug. X

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