Forum Discussion
So stressed Triple neg 5cm need positive stories
So stressed out. Just diagnosed with nearly 5cm triple neg idc at 33yo, no children yet, with very likely node involvement (not enough cells for conclusive but looks very likely in an enlarged node underarm) but all other scans and tests show no other cancer. I need to hear from others with same type and relative size and years beyond to have a positive outlook. Can't sleep, can't eat after seeing surgeon today - mastectomy surgery within next 2 weeks and auxiliary clearance then chemo and radiation. I am just so stressed about weather I bother saving my eggs as I read the outlook isn't that good for large triple neg but all I've ever wanted is children but no point if I won't be around. please I need to hear from others who have positive stories even ones with reoccurrence of large triple neg idc. Thank you.
74 Replies
- I can't help you with your concerns as I do not have your type of cancer nor am I your age, but I am hearing your desperation. There will be others who come here with their stories to help you, soon. In the mean time, search through the topics on this page, you might find someone else who has asked questions that answer your concerns and can give you some help. Someone told me to take some deep breaths, it helped. And to take each step at a time, it is too stressful to rush ahead all at once, perhaps you can find some comfort there too?
- Hi Tripple,
sorry you have to join us but welcome.
everything seems overwhelming when you first find out.
Nodes, grade, stage, size, tumour aggressive,
its impossible to entertain all at once.
I managed to keep my balance by rationing the time I spent on quality research, once a day for 1/2 an hour (never Dr Google and never in the night before sleep), then moved onto simple pleasures, researching where I'll travel when I'm done with all the chemo and surgeries etc..
easier said than done, I know, but it becomes a real discipline you can be proud of..
Try not to think too far ahead, just one thing at a time.
So far I've passed the mastectomy stage, 2/3rds of the way through chemo, and heading towards a second preventative mastectomy and reconstruction.
5 months ago, I couldn't imagine making It to this point without being in a heap but you will get there.
Right now, l'm looking at the line you typed .... 'but all other scans and tests show no other cancer' and I'm thinking that this is the positive to hang on to while you slow your mind and take a breath.
There are so many great women on here.
Jump on when you need them all.
Sending you hugs and warrior strength.
A. xx - Breathe- the worst part is now. With no plan laid out it feels like cancer has control.
Im also 33 and had a 5cm tumor and no kids. I do know of a couple girls around our age whove been through triple neg that are fine. Stay away from dr google and social media articles that relate to cancer.
Welcome hun, but feel free to shoot me a message if you want to chat with someone else xx - Hello Tripple, even though we all have different types of cancer, the one thing all the ladies on this site share is the feeling of shock and helplessness in finding out we have cancer.
You will find so many positive stories on this site.
I don't have much to add to what had already been but just wanted to let you know that you are not alone.
We are all here for you. Sending a hug, Jane xx
- Dear Hopes and Dreams
i don't post much anymore but came on here and saw your post and felt compelled to answer you. I had triple negative multifical,ie 3 small tumours and 3 positive nodes. I am now 2 years post diagnosis. It seems hopeless and incredibly scary at the start but this is treatable!! Big gains in research and lots of worldwide focus on triple negative breast cancer treatment. It helps to read other survivorship stories and there are plenty of them with similar and bigger size tumours than you have. It s hard to find histories on this site and unfortunately a lot of great blogs seem to have disappeared. If you go to breast cancer.org you will find a whole section on triple negative with threads all about women who are thriving up to 10 years and more after a triple negative diagnosis. Another credible site is tnbc foundation. Tnbc foundation site also has discussion forums and up to date research posted on it.
There are many other women on here who are doing well several years down the track and I'm sure they will also post. I understand totally how you feel, and it is important to know that not only can you survive but statistically you are likely to survive. Don't buy into all the doom and gloom on the web about tnbc. A lot of it is lazy reporting quoting statements from years ago.
You have a treatable disease and you can get through this!
I wish you all the very best and take care,
Lisa - Hi @"Tripple QLD" here is a link to all the post on the online network in regards to "Triple negative". You may like to take a read through the conversations. Our website also has a section on triple negative- click here. The members of the online network are wonderful and are here to answer any of your questions.
Hi, I was triple neg, 1.8 cm. 1 year on and I'm all clear. Lumpectomy, chemo then bilateral mastectomy (my choice, preventative as also BRCA2 pos).
As the others have said, don't buy into all the hype you read online about triple neg. My doctors weren't concerned about it being triple neg at all and now I've been given the all clear. If you are concerned about your fertility, speak to your oncol about the effects of chemo on your eggs. That was one of the first things my oncol raised with me.
Breathe. It's a lot to take in at the beginning and filtering through all the info. Feel free to ask any questions though.
Best of luck
Sherril
Hi Tripple Qld,
I got my 10 year grade 3/ triple 2cm/ no nodes/ diagnosed on my first mammogram aged 45 survivor badge last September and celebrated in China with a bunch of great dragon boat friends.
On my diagnosis, I was older than you and had 2 high school girls and my own business I had to to keep running through chemo and rads when diagnosed which was quite stressful at the time, as self employed people do not get any support but in a way kept me focussed on other things than me. Supportive Hubby, but no rellies around either. As you say you want children and don't know what is ahead of you. You didn't mention if you had a prospective father in mind!
Firstly, you should listen to the doctor's prognosis which although isn't great for the first 5 years looks a whole lot rosier than the other types after 10 years. Meanwhile this won't be useful for family planning -as 10 years is leaving it just a little bit late!
When you have a better picture of things sit back and look at your life and support system. Many women have unwanted children, many children are neglected. Some women have children who they dearly love and the mother dies suddenly unexpectedly anyway but life goes on. I remember my oncologist giving me survival rates then piping up - that there was a 2 % chance I could die of anything else in the next 10 years anyway! If we all worried that much the population would start rapidly declining.
No one really knows what the future holds for us, but if you really want a child and have good support/partner around and are then blessed with conceiving via IVF after all you go through with breast cancer why not follow your heart?
Mimsi :)
- I don't have your diagnosis, but I just wanted to say hi and agree with above posts, both on children and the negative reporting on tnbc. You don't have to decide right now if you will have children but give yourself the opportunity to be able to if you do decide this in the future. We don't know what our futures holds, breast cancer or not, but having choices is always a good thing. Take care. Kath x
- Hello there, I am a two time triple negative survivor. My first diagnosis was 3cm, aggressive with one 1cm enlarged positive node. I had lumpectomy, chemo, rads. I was 47 at the time. Unfortunatlely 6 months after all treatment completed I had a recurrence another 3cm aggressive tumour, all nodes clear this time. It was about 2 cm away from original tumour. Now the good news is that I am now 54 and got my 5 year all clear form second diagnosis in May last year, so heading for 6 very soon. Yes I had to do more chemo and have a mastectomy, but here I am nearly 6 years on. Hang in there, there are many stories like mine. One day at a time, remember to breathe.
Sending you huge hugs.
Paula xxxx
PS I'd be saving the eggs.
