Guilt

ZarratheStaffy, sorry to hear of your diagnosis. It feels like being blindsided when you get a cancer result. Try not to expect too much re people's responses. As you have experienced already, they can be disappointing.

At this time you don't need glib overly optimistic "she'll be right",  "stay positive" BS. whatever feelings you are going to have, every one of them is valid. Time enough for the positive punchlines, for now you can sit with each stage and process them in your own time. It is your journey not there's.

There are a lot of us here, who have trod the road too, and wish you well. As mentioned, lots of resources available when you need them, and great you have a supportive partner. 

What is working for me: one day at a time, being a bit selfish and putting me first for the time being. 

Sending positive vibes your way.