Devastated and confused

Hi.  I was diagnosed in September 2024. I still recall that initial mix of emotions & it’s overwhelming.  I suggest making contact with your local McGrath breast nurses. They are amazing & full of information for you.   It’s great to talk it through with people who know what you are going through.   I was given advice from a cancer survivor in the very early days.  Focus on what you know.  Try not to skip ahead as that takes you down paths you may never take.  Focus on one step at a time.  I hope all goes well.  Cheers Pam 

Morning.  I had a 2.9cm, grade 3 tumour on my right breast, that was hormone receptor positive.  I was told after my initial ultrasound that they didn’t think it had spread to my lymph.  (That was what I kept reminding myself whilst waiting results after my mastectomy - focus on what I know).  Turns out they were correct.   I avoided radiation as I opted for the mastectomy.  I was recommended 4 rounds of chemo.  My oncologist suggested I pay for oncotype testing ($5k) as he believed I may not benefit from chemo.  It came back that chemo would have no benefit for me, but I do need to take aromatase inhibitors - mine is Letrozole - for 9 years.  So I’m nearly 2 years post diagnosis & still no detectable cancer as of the last check up in April.  I’m starting the breast reconstruction journey, so that’s my next focus.  There is so much to learn & read about.  Be selective.  Try not to terrify yourself before you have all your results & information and take one step at a time.  Listen to your surgeon, breast nurse & oncologist.  Ask questions until you understand.  Take someone with you to every appointment as you never remember it all on your own. That’s my best advice.  I hope it all goes well for you. Xx

MazaDj​ I'm sorry to hear of your diagnosis. The early days are tough with so many unknowns and so many new things to learn. 

Random thoughts and questions popped up for me and I found it helpful to jot down questions in a note on my phone. When I went to meet my surgeon I went through the questions. Having never had surgery before one of my questions was: are you the one who will actually operate on me? to which he gently laughed and said yes.  No question is irrelevant, if it pops up in your head then put it to the next person you see and at the least they will advise you who can provide the answer.

As pjaz1327 mentioned, try to focus on the current information. There's a lot of scary stuff out on the internet that is completely irrelevant to your situation that can increase confusion.  One step at a time. 

Let your GP and specialists know about how you're feeling.  They will have ways to support you.

And you can reach out to the BCNA Helpline for a chat as sometimes that can be helpful in getting a few things out of our heads and reducing the stress.

Dearpjaz​ 

Waiting is one of the most difficult times but while you are experiencing shock and disbelief, it may actually help to remember that breast cancer is hardly uncommon (sadly), that treatment has improved over the years and an early diagnosis is a terrific start.

It’s also too easy, particularly in the absence of firm details, to imagine one horrible outcome over another. Try as hard as you can to only worry about what you know. The world is full of things that might happen, we would all be paralysed into total inaction if we acted on every possible fear. Keep ‘helpful’ people who want to tell you about their aunt’s illness or the website they found, at bay. They may mean well but can do real harm. Remember that reactions to treatment vary wildly - I had six months of chemo (much more developed cancer) and never as much as felt remotely sick. Ditto fatigue and brain fog.

It will help when you know what your treatment is - a breast care nurse may help a lot too, talk to your surgeon or GP. Do whatever it takes to calm your mind and heart in the meantime. Walk in fresh air, breathe deeply, listen to music, whatever. Best wishes.

Totally understand that fear,  shock & confusion. About 7 weeks ago I heard the words  ‘suspicious’ & had 2 biopsies for 2 separate lumps. The fear and waiting for the pathology results over the next week was awful. Then to be told it was early breast cancer. The breast Clinic doctor explained my pathology results  & where to next. There was a counsellor there too, who was lovely. It has been a roller coaster of really just being guided by Doctors. I recently had a double mastectomy…then the waiting for those pathology results. At this stage of recovery I’m still coming to terms with it all. What has helped is the word ‘early’, I am thankful for breast screen Australia who picked it up. I’m thankful for friends, family & medical staff who have been on the whole so kind, from the nuclear medical staff to the nurses, receptionists etc. So many women have stepped this path before us and lead the way. Our story may not be the same but we have all experienced that fear. Go for walks, talk to a friend, try to keep busy. I trusted my surgeon & her advice…that has helped. Take care about the information you google and advice you receive online. Sometimes I found myself getting more depressed by only reading information about breast cancer & other people’s experiences. I found that I needed a balance. You need positive people in your life now, the further I go into this journey, (which I am really still only at the beginning) the more at ease I feel. I do still have the fear of the unknown, how will I react to the hormonal blockers? What will the next scan say? We are choosing a tomorrow, one step at a time. Wishing you all the best as you take the next step. X

Hi, I was diagnosed less than a week ago with early breast cancer too. It's all a bit numbing for me.  I remember the new reality and feel weighed down, then remind myself nothing has changed so far and feel happier again. That is on repeat through each day.  I have read through some of the topics in here and seems to be a wealth of information.  Good luck to you. 

I was diagnosed with a small, (1cm) early invasive, grade 1, hormone receptor positive breast cancer in April. 

My journey, so far, through public health has been smooth, with lovely health care professionals ...everyone has been wonderful. Fortunately I only had 8 days from biopsy results to consultation with surgeon, but I went down every rabbit hole during that time. I was glad that I had good questions to ask, but since then I have pretty much relaxed into waiting to be told what is next.

My surgery was good, clear lymph nodes, clear margins and patholgy confirmed the initial biopsy results. A seroma in my armpit was a bit of a setback, but my only minor complication so far. I am about to start 3 weeks of radiation therapy and am on hormone blockers.

My best advice is to talk and read enough to feel you know the questions to ask, but "try" (easier said than done, I realise) not to get stuck in your head. Trust the experts, but ask questions if you need to, until you understand. Make contact with a breast care nurse as soon as you can - they are a wonderful support.

I recently had the Radiation Oncologist say to me "...but you cancer is gone! It's gone. We're only doing this to make sure there is the greatest chance it doesn't return." That took a bit to get my head around: I knew the pathology results, but on the treadmill for 3 months, I have been thinking of myself as a breast cancer patient, not really as a cancer-free person having some preventative treatment!

Wishing you all the very best for your treatment journey.

Hey. I’m hearing you 🥹 it’s two weeks since I was diagnosed after a whirlwind of tests. The shock, fear & panic is awful. I don’t have any advice as such but I’ve received so much support & wisdom here. It helps to feel not so alone. 
there’s no judgement with all the questions & I’ve felt such care & concern from all the other members

wishing you all the best with your journey, I’ll be walking a similar path alongside you 🌸

HiMazaDj​ -I’m sorry that you are facing this 😕I am so similar to you-  I was diagnosed on Tuesday too- my emotions are out of control😢I feel like I am also in a nightmare as we have spent the last 4 weeks getting extensive scans for my husband as he has been unwell- and this has sidelined me. It’s all the ‘what ifs’ that are driving me nuts- I am also a Year 12 teacher and need to get things organised for them - and found out today my referral from my GP ( from Wednesday) hasn’t gone to the surgeon- it will take another 7 days to process😩 I am grateful to the Breast screen Clinic - but I am terrified too🥲