Returning to work

Hi Kath,
I worked part time throughout chemo and found that it was to my detriment. I finished chemo in October 2014 and I still have times when I do too much that I get hit with the fatigue. I also found lots of people thinking and saying "oh well you've finished chemo, so you'll be right now". I still had 33 radiotherapy sessions to go and 7 months of herceptin to go. My onc told me that it could take up to 2 years to recover from treatment and I'm certainly finding this to be true. I explained it to my family that it wasn't just tired but it was overwhelming exhaustion and no matter how much I slept it made no difference. I think once your hair grows back, people find it difficult to relate that you are a cancer patient. I have a dear friend who is stage 4 and people don't believe her when she tells them she has stage 4 cancer because she looks too well! You need to do what's right for you. If you need extra time then take it. My employer struggled with the fact that I no longer did long hours and the like and they ended up sacking me because I wasn't working like I did before. Like you I will never work to breaking point again. I'm believe that it had an impact on getting cancer in the first place. Take care of yourself. Others don't get it because they haven't been there. Wishing you well. Karen xox

This idea that mental and physical health aren't connected needs to get in the bin. We have 100 million neurons in our dang guts alone, it's not like our brains live in glass jars somewhere. 

Kath, I absolutely feel its based on what you do for work and how you physically have been through treatment and currently. All of these things dictate for you personally on what you feel you should do, just remember put you first. Work is work, I learnt the hard way, I was incredibly ill through Chemo and couldnt work let alone function in any capacity, I was devastated not being able to work. Seems the universe had other ideas. Work can be a nice distraction but again depending on how demanding it is. Im lucky Ive managed 3 days a week 9 months on...BUT...because of the nature of my job my Occ. Therapist has said ENOUGH! I am not fit in any capacity to continue in fact work has now become detrimental. So its a fine line and balance. I thought I had it with working 3 days, but things have proven wrong and it does sadden me. So time to put me above work completely, plus my job is violent and having lumbar stenosis and osteoporosis now in my spine I am sooo wary of that job. Time for change but first ME...

Put you first however that looks for you...xo Melinda

Kath, 

I know exactly what youre saying, it was so tough when I had to admit I couldnt return last year, I felt defeated in so many ways. Ive always been a workaholic and my work is physical, but its also extremely mentally demanding with Autistic Children. I completely agree with what you are saying, I think also a gradual return leads to success. Give it a go and just know its OK however it works out. Its been a tough one I have found in being so conscientious, never having time off, but I do not put work above myself anymore...I need to heal more before I can give to my job the way I love to. I also have no support and 2 teenage children so juggling it all has proven too much. It was a much needed conversation with my Occ. Therapist today who really put my work into perspective but most importantly, put what Ive been through in perspective. It doesnt matter how strong you are, we forget to look at ourselves that way, we get lost in the journey. So its a nice reminder to say "Hey!!! I did all that and be proud...so be super kind to you, go slow and before you know it you'll be in full capacity and kicking butt...happy and healthy!!! hugs
Melinda

Hi Kath, when I complained about my fatigue to my oncologist his idea was to send me for a brain scan because in his opinion I had finished chemo and radiation and should be on the road to recovery by now and the Herceptin doesn't cause fatigue! Of course the MRI of my brain was normal. I've been doing the gym and exercise for 8 weeks now but I still have the fatigue. Constant pain also takes it out of me. I ended up asking to see a psychiatrist as I wanted to rule out depression. I saw one that specialises in breast cancer. I told her I was struggling with 15 hours a week and to my surprise she told me that even that was too much. She also told me I am not depressed but that I am drained of all my energy reserves just like a phone battery. She was the first doctor I have encountered who actually 'got it'. She told me to take time off, she'd even give me a letter for 6 months leave, which I would love to do but money is tight so I can't. Hubby and I are seriously thinking about redrawing on our home loan so we can have a break. He's exhausted too just in another way. The psychiatrist also made me think about the fact that there's a higher chance of HER2 positive coming back within the first 2 years and we need to be strong in case we are hit with it again otherwise it's going to be harder to cope with chemo the second time around. I am now thinking that if I take time off now I can always work a few months longer at the end of my career (can't wait until I hit preservation age at 60) to make up the difference. Also, I used to really love work, but because I am struggling so much I don't anymore. I don't want it to be that way, so maybe a break would help me regain my love for it. It's still hard to know what to do, but if I could wind back the clock to last October when I was diagnosed then I would definitely take a year off.

Hugs   Nadine

@nadi thanks for sharing! 

I have to say I totally agree with everything you said. In hindsight now I should have not returned to work, part of me wanted to feel normal again, but it has proven detrimental now. So time to reassess. Hardest thing is getting someone who 'Gets it' so its hard to talk to anyone, family or friends as they don't get it and have this expectation you are back to normal...so I find Im battling in silence and unsupported. Thankfully talking to my Occupational Therapist yesterday at the Epworth Hospital where I did an 8 week rehab program was fantastic, cleared the fog and gave me direction on how to approach things and my Oncologist...and is willing to step in and deal with him LOL. 

@ Ro10, you are right, I was told it takes a minimum of 12 months to recover from Chemo. Im 10 months post and still have a long way to go. I work 3 days and have had to concede to another year of reduced work capacity which is disheartening, its a very long road of recovery and NOBODY gets it. Best thing I did was see a Kinesiologist, this is the ONLY thing that is helping with my recovery. I take Magnesium as thats one of the most important things to be taking as it services something like over 300 enzymes in the body. So its super beneficial. I still have trouble walking, fatigue is bad too, exercising has proven impossible with no time and being a single parent. So its really just a day at a time, and everything is now on my terms LOL Definitely alot of things can help though, I eat well but rest is imperative.