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Nadi
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Re: I'm not ok ... looking for book recommendations that will chase the blues away
Thanks for the offer of posting the books @Gumnut. I read everything electronically as it allows me to blow up the text to large font, so I love my online kindle. I started A Man Called Ove but like you am finding it a bit of a slog. I haven't tried JoJO Moyes yet but she's on my "next to read" list. I have watched every episode of Schitts Creek at least twice. Brilliant show. Gotta love Moira and her wigs!! Wish I could have tried that during chemo. Another good, but strange one is Community, and AP BIO. Extremely light viewing - takes zero concentration and has some funnies in them but not as good as Schitt's Creek. Thanks for the suggestions.5Views2likes0CommentsRe: Pet Scan
Hi @Afraser I had a PET scan in July for another medical condition that showed ground glass opacity changes in my lungs which they are just going to watch for now because it could be something as simple as inflammation. No cancer was detected on the PET scan. I usually have a mammogram and ultrasound in October each year. Now I don't think I'll bother as the PET scan was clear of BC and it's just another test that cost money. Would you do the same? It'll be 5 years this October since diagnosis.29Views1like0CommentsRe: I'm not ok ... looking for book recommendations that will chase the blues away
Hi @arpie thanks for your thoughts and the reading suggestions. The IV antibiotics are working and the swelling to my face has gone down a lot today. They have suggested that my lymphoedema and a poor immune system can cause recurrent cellulitis in different areas. They have also told me that if I keep getting stung (I got 4 stings 2 weeks ago) I could develop quite a bad bee allergy that may require an epi pen, so my neighbour has agreed to move his hive further away from my veggie garden. I took antihistamine within 5 minutes of being stung, swelling didn't come up until 2 days later. Last bouts of cellulitis were caused by 1. a dog bite (friend's puppy nipped me) 2. a scratch from a branch while getting my home bushfire ready and 3. mosquito bite on leg. So I guess I am just really unlucky. Hope you are well, and thanks for the recs, Nadi5Views1like0CommentsRe: I'm not ok ... looking for book recommendations that will chase the blues away
Hi @Zoffiel, long time no speak. I have a confession to make. I used to write regency as well as scottish highlander historical romance fiction!!! I read Mills and Boons as a young teenager and got hooked on the romance genre. After I had my first son I started to write seriously. I never made money from it. But I did belong to a writer's group of 5 women, one of whom became VERY successful and took her fanfic stories and made them into novels which became films. Sadly, once she got to be very successful I never heard from her again which is understandable as we weren't all that close, more of an acquaintance, but other members of our little writing group who I was closer to came out from the US to stay with me which was great. Eventually I switched to online UST fanfic for a few sites and at my peak I had a fan base of over 10,000 which was both wonderful and stressful. In the end the pressure from fans and deadlines became too much and I no longer enjoyed it so I gave it up. I don't have the cognitive ability to write like that anymore, but I still read romance fiction. Tessa Dare, Loretta Chase (who specialises in bodice ripping westerns!), Karen Ranney, Lorraine Heath, Sophie Jordan, Carole Matthews, Pamela Clare, are some of my favourites. But my all time favourite is Karen Marie Moning's Highlander series - talk about hot hot hot Scottish highlanders !!! in my opinion Karen is much better than Diana Galbaldon's Outlander series, although I do love Sam Heughan as Jamie on the tv adaptation. Romance novels definitively offer a great escape from everyday woes. I think there are many women who enjoy romance fiction but may not like to admit it, but I am an out and proud romance reader! All the best9Views1like0CommentsRe: I'm not ok ... looking for book recommendations that will chase the blues away
Hi @Blossom1961. Thanks for the hugs, appreciate that. Any type of genre. I am not really picky and I have diverse tastes if it is a good read. I too do jigsaws everyday. I use an online jigsaw program offered by David Gray at www.jigsawgalore.com this way I have the space (as opposed to laying large jigsaw mats on my dining room table) and I can still do them when I am away from home like in hospital. Thanks for the suggestion. All the best, Nadi4Views0likes0CommentsRe: I'm not ok ... looking for book recommendations that will chase the blues away
Thanks @LizetteH. I hadn't read the Dalai Lama's Cat but your suggestion prompted me to get a sample from the Amazon Kindle store. Interesting concept. The part where HHC follows Tenzin into the first aid room to have lunch and he listens to Bach's Prelude in C minor reminded me I used to play that piece on piano 20 years ago. I haven't touched a piano in 10 years. This simple thing gave me the idea to start playing again. So a great outcome from your suggestion. And I will definitely be buying the book to see how the story turns out. I am sure there are a lot more things to teach me. I know that everything is overwhelming in the beginning. I promise you that some things get easier. Thanks for the suggestion and all the best with your treatment. Nadi7Views3likes0CommentsRe: I'm not ok ... looking for book recommendations that will chase the blues away
Hi @Cath62 - I do do have a gratitude journal but unfortunately it doesn't seem to be helping at the moment. I have ordered paint by numbers kit from paint plot which I hope will help with the mindfulness. I already do jigsaws everyday. Wishing you the best for your treatment. Thanks, Nadi16Views2likes0CommentsI'm not ok ... looking for book recommendations that will chase the blues away
The past few months have been particularly tough. While I remain BC free, my health has really declined in the past year. I spent 2 weeks in hospital in July then I left hospital early to be with my wonderful beautiful Dad who was dying of severe dementia. I am grateful I got to be with him for those last few weeks and hold his hand as he passed but it was an extremely difficult time. I took some time off to take care of my mum, organise the funeral and grieve but am now back in hospital with cellulitis to the face caused by a simple bee sting to the top of my head. This is the fourth time this year I have contracted cellulitis - twice before it lead to sepsis. It's my sixth hospital admission this year (and I don't even have BC anymore). I feel like I should receive frequent flyer points. So over the last few days, I have been feeling a bit down, and for the first time, a bit sorry for myself. I really need to read something uplifting. Any recommendations? Even if it isn't uplifting, maybe a real page turner, something I can't put down. Thanks in advance1.6KViews0likes44CommentsRe: Dexamethasone
Dexamethasone was my wonder drug while on chemo. It may me feel like super woman the day before, the day of and the day after my chemo treatment. Felt like I could run the olympics on this stuff. No wonder it makes covid-19 patients feel better. Didn't like the weight gain though.16Views1like0CommentsRe: Supporting a loved one with post-cancer depression
Hey Lottie I understand your concern for your loved one and think it is wonderful that you want to help her through this. This is such a hard road for many, and some of us who have other friends succumb to cancer and/or have cancer for a second or even third time themselves are served with more than their fair share. @Afraser has provided some great advice. I am not sure how long it has been since your friend has finished her last chemo. I am hoping that all this is a temporary thing and that she just needs more time before she starts to feel better. But if this is something that has, or is, lingering then perhaps sharing my personal experience which is a little different may be useful. My mother, while she doesn't have cancer, struggles, quite severely, with depression that has been brought on by some severe trauma in her life. She too continually asks 'why me?'. The trouble with that question is that there is no answer I could give that would provide her any comfort. It has taken me a long time to realise that when my mother asks "why me" what she really means is: "I just need to vent. Never in my wildest dreams did I ever imagine myself going through something like this. It has caught me completely off guard. I feel robbed and cheated out of a different life that I thought I would have. Sometimes I feel angry. Bad things aren't supposed to happen to good people and I think I am a generally good person. It's not fair. It is so overwhelming at times. I don't know how this happened. Sometimes I worry it happened because of something I did or didn't do. I feel so shell-shocked that I worry about what might happen next. I don't know if I can face anything more. I am so scared. It consumes me. I can't seem to enjoy anything because I am always on high alert for the next thing and that's exhausting. I worry if there is something I should be doing to prevent this from happening again. And even if there is, I don't know what it is I should be doing or even if I had the energy to do anything more. I feel so drained. I wish above everything else, that this will all go away and I'd be back to my old self." That's what my mother is really thinking when she's says "why me?" And yes, at first I though we just needed to fix this. I discussed seeing the GP, going to see a counsellor, anti-depressants, keeping a gratitude journal, "you have so many good things in your life", "there are some people even worse off than you", "don't sweat the small stuff", "this is just a part of life - there is no answer to the question of why" etc etc etc And everything I suggested fell on deaf ears and it didn't make my mum happy. Because, it's only recently that I finally realised she's not looking for me to make her happy or to solve her problems or to fix her, deep down she knows I can't. What she is looking for, is an opportunity to vent, to be raw, to be honest and open with someone who will not judge her or think less of her if she expresses her true feelings, her weaknesses, her fears. What she's also looking for is for me to show empathy and understanding that she is going through something incredibly difficult. She's also looking for me to acknowledge her pain. And in doing that, she may subconsciously be looking for some praise, because here she is, still standing, after all she's been through, and while everything still seems shitty because it's all so much and so scary still, it's remains remarkable that she's still here at all. When I finally realised that it is not up to me to fix her my whole approach changed. I went from looking for things she could avail herself of so she could recover, to looking for ways that I could support her. And so, now my approach - which I have only perfected after quite a lot of time of dealing with this - is to: 1. Acknowledge how difficult it is for her 2. Praise her in some way and 3. Redirect her so her mind is on something else. Acknowledge, praise and redirect. Not offer suggestions to solve the problem - that's not what my mum wants or needs. Acknowledge. Praise. Redirect. This is now my mantra. So when my mother is in despair or is "wallowing", basically it goes something along these lines: Her: Why me? Me: This has been so hard for you. I still can't believe everything you've had to go through. I wish this had never happened to you. I know you might not feel it, but I think you are so strong and I have learnt a lot through you. But most of all I am so glad to be sitting here with you, being able to have a cup of tea/coffee/talk. I love you so much and really want to celebrate today and this time we ave together. I want to put everything out of our minds and go to the park/shopping/movies/for a coffee?" My mum seems to react to this approach. She doesn't react well to me suggesting things that takes effort on her part like go to a counsellor because she doesn't really want to or can't. I now know I can't cure my mum's depression. I can't make her happy. But I can support her, and for my mum the above is the best way to do that. And funnily, knowing I am supporting her in this way, makes me feel less anxious about her being down at times. I guess I have come to accept her depression as her new normal, and learnt not to let it freak me out as much as it used to. Hope that makes sense. Apologies for the length of this reply but I hope this helps as I really feel where you are coming from. Wishing you and your friend all the very best. Nadine
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Work and breast cancer
PUBLIC GROUP - This is a space to connect around the challenges and questions that come with managing work and breast cancer. Whether you're navigating time off, returning to work, dealing with workplace conversations, or exploring your rights and options, you're welcome here. This group is open to the public (not just members of our online network) to help broaden access to important information, practical advice, and peer support.26 days ago17 Posts Let's talk: vaginas, menopause & me
PRIVATE GROUP. This group is a safe, supportive space to talk about sexual health and emotional wellbeing during and after breast cancer. We discuss topics like menopause, vaginal dryness, pain during sex, UTIs, and changes in libido, and share ideas and products that may help. Whether you're navigating intimacy with a partner or reconnecting with yourself, you're not alone here. This is a place for open, respectful conversations and shared understanding.Choosing breast reconstruction
PRIVATE GROUP. Choosing breast reconstruction after single or double mastectomy can feel overwhelming, and deeply personal. This group is here to connect you through others' stories and images. Please respect everyone’s privacy—do not copy or share content outside this space. Information is based on personal experience and is not medical advice; always consult your healthcare team for guidance. ⚠️CONTENT WARNING⚠️ Members may share photos of breast surgeries. These images or discussions may be distressing or triggering for some. If you need support, please contact the BCNA Helpline - we are here for you.
