Partner Issues
Hi there everyone. I’m really struggling at the moment. I was diagnosed with Stage 3 IDC and had to have a unilateral mastectomy, chemo and radiation . Unfortunately my partner of 7 years was unable to cope with the physical changes and never wanted to see me naked after the operation. He wasn’t very sensitive about saying “no” to my offer either. He recently cheated and we broke up. I feel very alone but determined not to date again until I’m ready - if ever. Has anyone else experienced similar ? I think I am on grief and feeling very disillusioned.🎧 Have you connected with our podcast: Upfront About Breast Cancer
Within our Online Network, we know how important it is to feel informed, supported, and connected at every stage of a breast cancer experience. One of the many ways we support our community is through our Upfront About Breast Cancer podcast. This is a resource created for you, where real stories, expert insights, and practical guidance come together in a way that is easy to access whenever you need it. A much loved part of the podcast is the What You Don’t Know Until You Do series, hosted by Dr Charlotte Tottman. Dr Tottman is a psycho oncologist who has supported many people through the emotional impact of cancer and, following her own breast cancer diagnosis. Her thoughtful and compassionate approach creates a space where the emotional side of breast cancer can be explored openly, helping listeners better understand their own responses and feel less alone in what they are experiencing. 💬 Real conversations from our community Upfront About Breast Cancer brings together the voices that matter most. People with lived experience share their stories alongside healthcare professionals and experts, creating conversations that feel both genuine and reassuring. These discussions reflect the reality of breast cancer. They explore the shock of diagnosis, the emotional highs and lows, and what it can take to adjust to life during and after treatment. For many, simply hearing someone else say “me too” can make a powerful difference. 🌱 Supporting you at every stage We know that every experience is different, which is why Upfront About Breast Cancer is designed to support people across all stages. Whether you are newly diagnosed, living with metastatic breast cancer, supporting a loved one, or moving through life after treatment, there is something here for you. Episodes cover important topics such as what to expect after diagnosis, how to communicate with your healthcare team, managing side effects, and navigating the healthcare system. This means you can return to the information in your own time, absorb it at your own pace, and feel more prepared for the next step in your journey. 👉 Listen to Upfront About Breast Cancer podcast here. 🌸 A gentle reminder Some topics may feel emotional or challenging. Please take things at your own pace and look after yourself as you listen. Support is always available, the online community and our Helpline on the phones are here for you. Have you listened to Upfront About Breast Cancer? We'd love if you shared: an episode that stayed with you something new you learned a conversation you would like to hear in the future 💪 Your experience may help someone else going through a challenging part of their journey. We are stronger, together.
Write off 6 to 12 months?
I was given a diagnosis today of small tumor, early invasive breast cancer, double hormone positive and I have an appointment with surgeon in 1 week. At just-turned-60, the next 9 months were supposed to include 2 sons' graduations, 1 son's wedding (a family first), our 25th wedding celebration, a road trip to find-purchase-or-build a new home in a tree-change location in another state, and downsizing-packing-relocating. Surgeon and nurse at breast clinic today seemed to think "we can work around things" ...is that realistic? What is the most valuable question to ask the surgeon, next week, re time frames and realistic expectations? Thanks.Just need to talk to someone
I’m 59yo and newly diagnosed with breast cancer. I’m really not sure I get what is going on either because I’m just slow or it’s just not all clear yet so I feel confused, in total panic and that I’m drowning and there is nobody to save me 😢 I am waiting for an mri this Thursday. I have a 10cm Not Special Type Grade 1 something positive to do with hormones and her2 1+. The surgeon says mastectomy is the only choice because of the size. There isn’t anything clear about what happens after that… is that how it’s meant to be? I just feel very lost appreciate any words of wisdom for these circumstances? susan
Triple negative recurrence
Hi I was diagnosed with Triple Neg last March 2024 and finished chemo and radiation end Sept. I got through it all fine-not too many side effects bar the usual and I was exercising, eating well, and feeling positive about it not returning but then in November I felt a lump but wasn't too concerned I thought is was just fibrous tissue post radiation but it has returned and not only that I now have a small oestrogen postive one in the other breast. In a week and a half i have gone from ultrasound, PET scan biopsy and starting chemo last week and had 2nd one today. As well as immunotherapy and a double masectomy when chemo has finished. I'm just finding it quite hard to cope with this time (even though) the PET scan shows it hasn't spread anywhere. I was so strong last time but this time I feel like the rug has been pulled out from under me and I'm finding it hard to stay positive. I sat and just had tears running down my face for a lot of the chemo today. I didn't really feel the need to use BCNA much last time but this time I think I need some extra support. Thanks for listening, just nice to know there are people out there who can empathise with how I'm feeling. Take care.
Working while waiting for surgery
Hi all, was diagnosed 3 weeks ago today with early stage and was told I’d be having surgery pretty quickly. Ended up having to have more tests to eliminate issues in the other side and thankfully that all seems to be clear. But that has meant I still don’t have a date for surgery (I should find out tomorrow hopefully). My question is about how you’ve all kept sane during this ‘limbo’ period. My emotions and anxiety are all over the place, I can’t really focus or concentrate so I’ve taken a fair few days off work. I’m lucky enough that I can work from home (when I’m up to it) and my boss is awesome but I weirdly feel guilty about taking time off as though I should be managing this better. I’m conscious my surgery might not be for another few weeks so feel I need to work out better ways to handle this. Any inputs welcome! Thanks.
Newly diagnosed and waiting for appt. breast becoming more tender as I wait :-(
Hi there, I feel I’m in the difficult position of waiting four weeks between diagnosis and first surgeon appointment. Invasive lobular ER+ PR + HER2 - lump that I noticed in right breast a month ago. I’ve had the MRI done privately this week so the information is ready at that appointment. Trouble is the breast and armpit just feels increasingly niggly and slightly tender while I wait. I’m worried that it’s just growing/spreading as I wait. I don’t have private insurance, do have savings. but wanted to hold out for public and it being a more multi-disciplinary team. I’m really struggling wondering if I should have gone private and quick :-( Thank you xNew diagnosis metastatic breast cancer
Hi, I'm all very new to this being diagnosed only 7 wks ago with stage 4 metastatic breast cancer (triple positive) which has spread to my bones. I am 51 with 2 children. I had only had my first mammogram 18 mths previous which was clear. I felt unwell at work & went to hospital and they found it looking for something else. It has been such an overwhelming process. My family & friends have been amazing but am feeling so very alone.Returning to work and finding the new normal
Hi all, I was diagnosed with stage 2 IDC, ER and PR positive in January last year (2025). I had 2 lumpectomies followed by a mastectomy, then chemo and radiation. Radiation finished in October and now I'm on Tamoxifen. I've been off work since right before my mastectomy (thanks income protection insurance!), and I'm planning to return to work in a month's time. By that time I will have been away from work for just about 12 months. I'll be doing a phased return to work, I work for a large organisation and my employer is very supportive. I'm really nervous about returning to work. My job is pretty mentally demanding and can be stressful with pressure and tight deadlines. I'm really worried that my brain fog won't allow me to do my job effectively. I know I'm not going to be able to multitask at all. I don't feel like the same person I was a year ago and I'm concerned I won't be able to cope, that I'll embarrass myself and damage my reputation. Has anyone else had a similar experience with a positive outcome to give me some hope? Or any advice about managing brain fog and a demanding job? TIA Bec :x
