What are you doing for your mental health?

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  • kmakm
    kmakm Member Posts: 7,974
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    @Harvey1903 No worries. K
  • Brummie
    Brummie Member Posts: 9
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    @sisteriser brown thanks for sharing some of the factors contributing to the dx of cancer and the wasy you continue to use reflection to  manage /  overcome this.  its certainly help me to hear that im.not alone in that belief of stress playing a part.  i certainly am not going back there again.  Not for a job 
  • Brummie
    Brummie Member Posts: 9
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    Thanks arpie.  not afraid to ask questions i have about a few things .
  • Brummie
    Brummie Member Posts: 9
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    @marakesh my family are away in the UK and the  states but they are always on the phone by way of messaging, whatsapp, or email.  i dont feel as though im dealing with things on my own at all.  it has made a huge difference to me.  
  • Brummie
    Brummie Member Posts: 9
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    @ marakesh just been told that ny contract cannot be extended so Ill have to return to my old job which was relenessly stressful and woyld further impede my recovery so like you, i need more time to heal and to look after myself x
  • Marakesh
    Marakesh Member Posts: 78
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    Sorry @Brummie I only just saw this! That’s not great news about the contract . I hope you’ve been able to work out something? 🌹🌹🌹
  • Sister
    Sister Member Posts: 4,960
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    @brummie That's really tough to find out that you have to return to a stressful job.  Are you up for looking for different work?
  • arpie
    arpie Member Posts: 7,798
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    That's a real Bummer, @Brummie  -  I hope you'll be able to find something a bit less stressful, if possible.


  • Brummie
    Brummie Member Posts: 9
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    Hi All, I am not looking at the moment.  I've decided to just look after myself now.  I will need to obtain some advice to determine what my options, rights are and take it from there.  
  • Blondy
    Blondy Member Posts: 238
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    A very good question. When you are on the treadmill of appointments, surgery  chemo, rads you tend to emerge months later, rather shattered to say the least  It's taken up every bit of your time and energy ....... and then, all of that intense treatment is at an end and you are left with your thoughts. Enter the next battle, Mental health. I found this step the hardest of anything I have ever done in my life. It totally messes with your head  Coming to this site in the early stages was too much, and set me back. I was unable to cope with reading about everyone else's suffering. It seemed every where I looked I'd hear or read about breast cancer. I plodded on week after week keeping myself extra busy and doing a lot of pep talking to myself  Overall I have found 'time' to be the healer. I have noticed in the last six months since my treatment ended,  at just how far Im winning this mental battle. I can come to this site and make comments and hope I can give inspiration or help to others. It doesn't bother me if I read and hear about breast cancer. I've stopped arranging my funeral  I mean there were at least 60 songs I wanted played, plus a violin concerto. As a matter of fact it was only today or should I say yesterday, as its the middle of the night, that it dawned on me that it's been quite a few days since I stopped  thinking daily and often that I had cancer. I plan long term goals and have my life mapped out well into old age. I tell my husband who is 17 years my junior that when I'm 98 I'll still be kissing him with or without teeth . Having a positive attitude and the determination to not let cancer rob me of my happiness is what has got me through. All I yearned to do was to return to normal and I've pretty much reached that place.. Think positive, act positive  be positive.,surround yourself with positive people and ditch any negativity. It does get easier but you will be the driver. Good luck 
  • Sister
    Sister Member Posts: 4,960
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    I know what you mean @blondy by being surrounded by breast cancer.  I choose to come to this site but I have no control over what other things I "bump" into.  It became the only topic of conversation (and to be fair, I wasn't doing anything to hae other topics) and, for awhile, every single book I read had a side character who had died/was dying of bc.
  • LIttleBlueWren
    LIttleBlueWren Member Posts: 88
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    Crying! lots and lots of crying, I really wish that I had shares in a tissue company LOL. I cry easily though, at movies, books and kindness, almost anything sets me off.

    Finding the silver lining.  When I was first diagnosed I was in a cute shop and noticed a little necklace with a silver cloud and a lightning strike through it, the necklace triggered a thought 'silver linings' I bought the necklace and now always try to find a silver lining in every day, such as being at home not working, my partner and I are much closer than ever, meeting other ladies going through this, time to garden and finish craft projects.

    Managing the tough days.  They will happen, today sucks big time for me, it is last day I will be complete as tomorrow my breast is being chopped off (yes, strong words but I am unhappy about it).

    Make yourself your number one priority and do whatever calms and relaxes you.

  • Blondy
    Blondy Member Posts: 238
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    @sister. How it makes you feel when you read and see all of that kind of info will be a testament to how much better mentally youre doing. I had no idea it would get easier, but I'm becoming immune to everything i see and hear. Not denial either lol. @LittleBlueWren, of course you have everything to cry about right now. Hopefully your partner will be your rock and get you through this. Men that are worth their salt will still make you feel a million dollars, no matter what we end up looking like post surgery. You were meant to find that necklace. Its a lovely story and has given you strength. Its still got a lot of work in front if it, and things will improve from now on. 
  • kmakm
    kmakm Member Posts: 7,974
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    @LIttleBlueWren My BS and I had some discussion round the word 'mutilation' when we were talking about the BMX. He agreed that it was, and that made me feel better, that he acknowledged what a big thing it was, to chop off your boobs.

    I have no regrets (I had a DIEP recon). Good luck tomorrow. Look forward to a future with much. less. worry. K xox