Having trouble just coping

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Comments

  • socoda
    socoda Member Posts: 1,767 ✭
    Hey @Shorelle, I reckon you're being a bit hard on yourself!! If you can't feel a bit down when you are going through treatment then when can you!!! It's not just a physical assault on your body, it is also on your mind! BUT believe it or not you will laugh again, you will be happy again, and you will appreciate your life and all that is good in it. I have changed from a person who was gunna do to a doer!!! And I am thoroughly enjoying myself - I'm very happy. Sending you a big happy hug (it will get better!!!)Xx Cath
  • Shorelle
    Shorelle Member Posts: 80 ✭
    You are so right. I suppose Ive never been a victim or had been one to complain. I just always brush myself off and get back up again. Everything else you can fix or you have to accept.   so I dont know how to feel, act, belong anything. All I know is Im crying all the time and have no drive. My husband isnt helping either and has treated this a bit like something I should just get over. Omg so not coping but need to wipe my eyes and find a smile. I have 3 little girls who need dinner and showers and kisses and cuddles.  I really just want to hide under a rock right now. 
  • primek
    primek Member Posts: 5,392 ✭
    Cry when you need. Rest when you have to. You will get through this. You are stronger than you think. We all get it. We've all been there. Recovery of the mind is harder than the physical part of treatment. It does get better. Believe. Kath x

  • Ann-Marie
    Ann-Marie Member Posts: 1,113 ✭
    @Shorelle as you can see the members are incredible. We are all here to support you. This is the link to the young women's group
  • Spiv1803
    Spiv1803 Member Posts: 126 ✭
    I was diagnosed yesterday. Grade 3, no hormones involved.
    very stressed.
  • iserbrown
    iserbrown Member Posts: 5,766 ✭
  • Ann-Marie
    Ann-Marie Member Posts: 1,113 ✭
    Hello @Spiv1803 It's never easy welcoming a new member to the online network but you have come to a great place where the members are amazing. You have posted into a conversation so some members may miss your post. If you click the pink button 'new discussion' you can create a new conversation and ask any questions you may have.
  • wendy_h67
    wendy_h67 Member, Dragonfly Posts: 466
    Hi Shorelle,  All I can say is you will get through this and it will make you a stronger and wiser person . Don't be too hard on your self. Enjoy thoes 3 little girls of yours . They grow up so fast .
  • Unicornkisses
    Unicornkisses Member Posts: 402 ✭
    @Shorelle I hope you are feeling a little more positive now.
    Having your young children would really bring it home to you what is at stake here.
    I found I coped a lot better when I got involved with the groups that my local Cancer Care ram, Tai Chi, exercise and wellness seminars. I am currently doing Art Therapy.
    I made some friends from the group who live nearby and we meet up for coffee when we get a chance. Seeing people further along in the treatment who were doing well and could give advice was very helpful in calming my nerves and improving my outlook on the whole cancer thing. 
    Having the warm support from everyone made a world of difference.

    I still have meltdown moments, it doesn't take much, leaving my glasses at the Oncologist, cutting up the wrong bank card even though I was so careful to compare all the numbers when I was checking them. It was just the last straw and had me at the point of throwing things I was so fed up with everything.

    Having to fit in all these appointments, some of which are not fun, with work, life, family and other commitments is stressful.
    It is perfectly normal to get emotional when it all becomes too much.

    But remember there are counsellors out there if you need them, this is exactly what they are there for, and they are familiar with dealing with the stress of cancer, so use them if you can.
    I see a counsellor every couple of weeks, during stressful treatments and before a challenging event such as MRI. 

    It it is scary stuff if you stop to think too much about it, so I don't. I just get on doing what I have to do to get well.
  • viking1
    viking1 Member Posts: 288 ✭
    @Spiv1803  Got your message and now trying to contact you. Yes, I am more than happy to come and chat and hopefully help with your fears.  Glad we are both in Perth! I know you are scared, but it is doable one step at a time. There is a great support network here plus at your hospital. I am at Charles Gairdner and their Solaris Cancer Centre is amazing with huge support and free complementary therapy treatments eg massage, acupuncture, mindfulness meditation, library etc. I have my third chemo coming up soon, so still a newbie like you. Like you I had a lumpectomy then went back into hospital for all my lymph nodes to be removed in my right arm.  I must say that for me, the surgery was the easy part. But we are all different and we are both very lucky to have lumpectomies and not major surgeries like some of the lovely ladies here. Hang in there and I will see you soon xxx
  • Shorelle
    Shorelle Member Posts: 80 ✭
    Would love to meet up to support each other. Im feeling a bit better niw. I live in Mundaring. 

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