Crying the whole day

kimmi17

Just wanted to vent out my emotions.  Been crying the whole day & I know its not healthy.  I have so much regret that I got this bc & I feel like all our dreams are shattered.  We have so much plans (me & my husband) & today, all of those plans came into my mind one by one & I just cried & got so depressed.  I am still in the middle of treatment & I feel tired but I know I need to fight.  I have to stay focus & positive as we are just a young couple starting to enjoy our adventures in life. It has been very tough knowing you have bc & today has been so hard.

primek

@kimmi17 It's fine to cry. I felt cheated that finally my husband and I were going to have more alone trips away ...and plan even a cruise. But it is all on hold. During my chemo was my worst time. It makes you mentally and physically miserable. I still have 8 months of Herceptin to go...but already am starting to feel more positive and dare to think of life after cancer treatment. You will too. Meanwhile do your best. Put on something pretty. Do your face...if up to it ..go out for tea or to the movies. Just the 2 of you. Do something you love each day. You are fighting ....crying is just letting out that built up fear and sadness. Positivety will come once chemo is finished. Take care. Kath x

socoda

Hey Kimmi, who says it's not healthy to have a cry and rid yourself of stresses and strains!! I think that amongst everything else we have to deal with having a good cry also helps us purge and enables us to clear our system, and get ready for more fighting!!! Very very necessary. I don't think I've ever cried as much (I used not to be a crier) BUT now if I'm going to have a cry don't stand down river - you'll get swept away!!!! Use it for what it is - a release!! And if you can manage like my little sister who when she cries her nose doesn't turn red, her face doesn't go blotchy, she doesn't get a headache - she just elegantly has two little tear tracks that oh so slowly trickle their way down her cheeks and which she can just pat away (without the need to foghorn blow her snotty nose - which she doesn't get!!) All the better!! Go for it and hope you feel better. Big big hugs Xx Cath

kimmi17

Kath,  thanks for your sweet message & support.  I would give you a big hug right now.  Its so comforting to know that there is always someone somewhere to encourage & uplift our situation.  Take care! My real name is Tina

Ro10

Ro10

I had to re-post @Lispy 's quote above for this one cos it's so true! I actually think crying is good for the soul. I've never been much of a crier myself - I don't think I even cried once while I was pregnant but since I was diagnosed, I've been an unpredictable blubbering mess! Half the time I don't even know why I'm crying! I think it's therapeutic to have a good cry, especially with what we are all dealing with. And some days are definitely better than others. But if it gets a bit hard to manage or you are crying every dat, maybe chat to a counsellor. I think you can access them through the BCNA site. Thinking of you and hoping you feel better soon.

rowdy

Hi stop being do hard on yourself it is a tough trip and you are still in active treatment. Tomorrow is another day. I think we all go through what you are going through now.As women I think we are normally so in control of what is happening next. 
The ladies are right do something nice, when I was going through treatment my husband took me out every day when I could to the local cafe for a coffee it dosen't sound much but it did make a difference. Sending you a big hugxx

melclarity

Kimmi!
Just wanted to give you the biggest cuddle and tell you you are allowed to feel everything you are feeling and if its a whole day of crying...so be it!!!! Its so normal, and we all can relate to how all our hopes and dreams came crashing down at diagnosis, so we sure hear you! After having tackled this twice in 4yrs, I have learnt that in this moment is all we have, do not look too far ahead. Your focus right now is just you and getting through each day and each thing you need to do for you. I found when I let go of all expectations of how I thought my life was going to be and what I wanted, it allowed me to step back and just put me above everything and get through treatment. 

10 months on, my life is very different, I no longer put work above me I am now in the smallest of ways putting myself first and honoring every ounce of me. I am working, and heading away on my first trip since it all happened last year. I never would have thought Id get through it, and I NEVER thought Id feel well again from treatment to even travel. But HERE I GO LOL....It absolutely will get better but get through the hard yards first...the rest will come. Big Breath...day at a time is all you need to do and just let people love you. 
Hugs
Melinda xo

kimmi17

Thanks everyone for all the comforting words & uplifting messages.  Big hugs to all of you!

ScorpionQueen

Sending you a huuuuuuuuuge hug! You are battle weary....You are going through an enormous ordeal! It's normal to cry, scream, punch, kick! Let the bad roll with the good.....unless you find yourself in that dark place for too long, then seek help.....otherwise it's perfectly acceptable.....We had big plans too, as our kids are now adult.....but you know what? those plans are still plans, just delayed a little is all.....take a deep breath and step back from everything......you've got this, and we've got your back

Chelle48

Hi Kimmi,
Breast Cancer is a rollercoaster of emotions... I am a year on from my diagnosis and loss of left breast...I still cry, I get depressed and anxious and I have lost confidence in myself. Some people become stronger after they have experienced and survived cancer... there are those like myself who have found it harder...and you are still in the middle of all the treatment...you are going to feel battered and bruised, but try to stay in the moment and don't think too far ahead, just one day at a time and be very caring and gentle to yourself, lots of self care and nurturance. I have found it hard too, to get back to work...what I class part of my normal pre BC life. With brain fog, my battered self confidence and fatigue (from Tamoxifen and other drugs I take) I have found it extremely hard to work again...and that makes me feel very sad. It certainly is a grieving process.  I and am sure many others on this forum have sobbed... We all can relate and all feel for you, I really hope you start to feel a bit brighter soon - sending lots of hugs and white light, take care, Michelle.