Get Connected Day!
Comments
-
Hi Carolyn. Sorry to hear things are not so good but you are seeking help and thats great. I am heading to Qld for 2nd conference and one of the sessions i have booked into is depression and anxiety with breastcancer. I hope to get heaps out of this not only for myself but to share with others. Will get back to you soon as to any suggestions that the experts reccommend. I facilitate a younger womans cancer support group in my local area and we have several ladies with secondarys and most of us at some stage get very down with our lot, we are lucky to have each other for support at these times. Do you have a group near you that can give you support as often only those going through the similar ordeals really understand. You are not alone, great to see you on BCNA network and will touch base with anything I think may help. Until then, take time-out for yourself (as mothers/wifes etc we often put ourselves last) go for a long walk, sit in a sunny spot, pat the dog, go for lunch or a movie with a friend, smell the roses, but do something just for you, everything else will still be there when you have recharged. Good luck, Kaz
0 -
Hi, My name is Ree. I am 33, mother of 3 young boys and having bilateral mastectomy on the 15th October. Have had small lumps appearing in my breasts for the past 10 years, the closest I've come until now was changes in the cellular appearance but they achieved a good margin and no further treatment was required. This time, not as lucky, as I'm sure you can tell, not really sinking in still. Been through the mill with tests - mammograms, ultrasounds, biopsies, MRI's - it's almost like they all feel it is an affront to diagnose this and keep trying one more thing to refute the diagnosis....but I guess the more data they have to hand will help with my course of treatment?
I'm looking for any young people who have gone through this procedure and can share their experiences with me - I'm terrified on how to cope with this as well as try to keep a normal front on for my boys. How do you juggle it all and stay sane? I can't find any groups close to me - rural area outside of Adelaide - but am willing to look online for the answers and support.
Hope to hear more soon....
Ree
0 -
Hi Ree, welcome to the network.
We do have some younger users here, so one thing you can do is try an age-related search, and then click through to the different members to see who you might have something in common with. Here's the link for the search page: http://www.bcna.org.au/network/users.Feel free to ask in this group if there's anything you're not sure of.
Di
0 -
Hi Kaz, so far no luck with a local support group. Nor am I aware of a homecare group. Decided to put that worry back and focus on being well, although a little concerned about the near future when my house is supposed to be going on the market - won't that be interesting lol. Just been resting and enjoying my animal menagerie. Yes they are a large part of the mess but the joy they give me is worth it. Hope the Gold Coast turns it on for you; I was up there in August for a few nights and it was sooooo nice to be warm for a change. Had a great time with my daughter and her friends. Oh and thanks for the compliment on the pic but I gotta tell you I have aged significantly since then (bloody chemo) plus I had just arrived in Milan and was soooooooooo excited lol. Enjoy :0)
Lynne
0 -
Hi Lee, great to hear from you thank you. Am beginning to wonder if I will ever catch up and am fast coming to the conclusion I need to stop caring about it, for good lol! I am selling my house and thinking seriously of taking at least 6 months to reassess. I am concerned I won't be able to buy again but you what? I am so over working 5 days a week and living just to service a mortgage. I love my home, but I think it is time to live my life. Just got to work out about accessing the Herceptin treatment every 3 weeks. Had my 'planning' scan today, the girls on the team were lovely and I confess I was very relaxed which is great. A bit more chilled out about having my last treatment tomorrow, almost excited. I know the next 3 weeks or so are going to be s*$! but then it is done YAY!.
Lynne
0 -
Hi Mel thank you for your post and your thoughts for my well being. I think you posted recently that you are now being treated for secondaries? I am so sorry, it must have been devastating news, just when you think you are done with it all. I guess that is something we all have to deal with. How was it identified? I did ask my doctors about follow up tests but they indicated that other than future mammograms there would be no tests as there was nothing to look for (my post surgery biopsies and scans were clear); this did not make sense to me and I intend to discuss it further with my surgeon when I see her in October. How is the treatment going, are they using the same approach or different mix? How are you coping? I hope it is not as rough for you second time around.
Lynne
0 -
Sorry to hear lifes a bit of a struggle right now but I have found this website excellent for support and info (unfortunatly not during my treatment, only recently) and I'm sure you will too. I have "met" some wonderful people and sometimes just sharing your thoughts seems to make your worrys a little lighter. We're all here to listen and support each other. If you havent already been told about the "My Journey" package that BCNA offer it's well worth getting as it has a statewide services and info flyer and i know my WA one has a BC clinical phycology free service for you and your family. My son was 10 when I was diagnosed and struggled, the cancer council paid for a phycologist to talk to both of us and it really helped him. You didnt mention a partner, but there is also a cd that comes for them as I know my hubby struggled and still wanted to be my rock (which he was)and flyers for friends and family too, so they know how to help best. I will be thinking of you on the 15th, I hope you have a speedy recovery, take your time, your body will tell you when you've had enough, and remember your never alone
0 -
Thank you kaz. I will do a search and see who I can find :O) I guess it's a bit harder for support as my husband works offshore on a FIFO schedule. Unfortunately he doesn't get annual leave and has to use his sick leave - not much of it - and that adds to the stress. I did receive the My Journey package and hubby already grabbed the cd and had a read through it. He seems to have gotten a bit more calm since then so hopefully he has found something in there tohelp him. We are lucky in that my husband's company is paying for a psychologist for the whole famliy, for as long as we need it. That helps, there are several professionals in the one practice who cover just about every spectrum we need ie experience with women dealing with BC, a childhood specialist and a "blokey" bloke for huby, who finds it easier to go have a beer with Mark adn chat that way - really open and forward thinking practice. It would just be nice if the company could give him some more paid leave time :O(
I look forward to getting to know more people...
0 -
Hi Ree
my name is Mel and i was 31yrs old when i was diagnosed, im so sorry you and your family have to go through this.
i have 2 kids a 4yr old and a 13yr old and i had a bilateral masectomy in feb 09, i found the surgery ok, i was glad to get rid of the cancer so it felt like a first step to getting started! i didnt have alot of pain mainly trouble getting comfy sleeping.
i also worried how to "keep normal" but we justy battled through as best we could, my parents borrowed my kids for the first week after surgery and it was a help but really i just wanted them home with me, it helped my husband to have something to do by looking after the kids.
once chemo started we just kept on telling the kids it was to make me better and they coped ok,. we just counted them down as a family and celebrated each one as we got closer to being the last chemo!
we as women are amazingly resiliant i look back now and think... yep those other 3 weeks a month i was a normal mum & wife it was just that pesky chemo week that was ordinary!
i be thinking of you in the coming weeks its such a rollercoaster of emotions.. i remember how shocked and scared i was, but i found a way to get through it and im sure you will too.
take good care of yourself
feel free to ask any questions about my experiance
Mel
ps; i have a very blokey hubby but amazingly he can cook and clean now! dont know where he hid it for the last 14yrs!!
0 -
Hey Lynne
thanks for your reply, and yep it was pretty horrible when i was told i had it for the 2nd time! but i getting there,
I originally had a gall stone kind of pain and had an ultrasound, that was back in april and US said it was a cyst but thankfully my over zealous gp wanted it checked, long story short took 8 week a gastro specialist, PET scan and biopsy to confirm, not at all what i expected, i didnt think anything could survive chemo! but with going off the tamoxifen for my reconstructive surgery in June, maybe that fired it up.. who knows!
im having hormone treatment for the liver tumour and just finished radiation for the spot on my hip,
i feel no diffrent than normal, feels kind of strange to not demand chemo, i thought bring it on! lets get it done but docs advice was to give hormone treatment 8 weeks and see size of tumour, so thats were i up to, see onc on Monday, had blood test today so i guess we will learn a bit more on monday.
i also wanted tests done after my treatment but i think your body tells you if theres a problem
im sure you'll come through with flying colours!
take care of your self and celebrate that final chemo!
Mel
0 -
Hi again,
I've had a good day today, so I'm getting on with my emails. My blood test results were good. My cancer marker has dropped one to 7 & my liver function has improved slightly. My specialist said to go another 6 weeks until the next blood test & to also get a CT scan done then as I haven't had one since January. That's a bit scary, thinking I hope no new tumours have popped up, but also it'd be great if it showed smaller or less tumours in my liver. I've had a good day today as I've kept active washing, ironing & mowing. I know that doesn't sound terribly exciting but it can be sooo hard to push through the fatigue caused by the depression. Some days it just gets me down thinking when is this not going to be a struggle any more & also I feel guilt at not being the bubbly active mum/wife I was before & guilt that I have depression when other people with cancer have been through a lot worse then me. I haven't had surgery or radiation. Any way here's to a good day. It's great having this contact with you all & I am trying to go for a 20 min walk each morning to get going & I've cut out an artice from the local paper about some ladies wanting to form a support group in the area. We live in a small beach community 1/2 hr from town. So that can be isolating & a terribly long drive when you feel lousy. Hopefully My Journey pack will arrive this week. I'm also looking forward to hearing what w.a kaz finds out about depression from the conference.
Take Care All :-)
0 -
Hi again,
I've had a good day today, so I'm getting on with my emails. My blood test results were good. My cancer marker has dropped one to 7 & my liver function has improved slightly. My specialist said to go another 6 weeks until the next blood test & to also get a CT scan done then as I haven't had one since January. That's a bit scary, thinking I hope no new tumours have popped up, but also it'd be great if it showed smaller or less tumours in my liver. I've had a good day today as I've kept active washing, ironing & mowing. I know that doesn't sound terribly exciting but it can be sooo hard to push through the fatigue caused by the depression. Some days it just gets me down thinking when is this not going to be a struggle any more & also I feel guilt at not being the bubbly active mum/wife I was before & guilt that I have depression when other people with cancer have been through a lot worse then me. I haven't had surgery or radiation. Any way here's to a good day. It's great having this contact with you all & I am trying to go for a 20 min walk each morning to get going & I've cut out an artice from the local paper about some ladies wanting to form a support group in the area. We live in a small beach community 1/2 hr from town. So that can be isolating & a terribly long drive when you feel lousy. Hopefully My Journey pack will arrive this week. I'm also looking forward to hearing what w.a kaz finds out about depression from the conference.
Take Care All :-)
0 -
Hi Carolyn, my name is Celeste and I just wanted to say "hello" and to let you know that you are not alone in your BC journey. I have not had a secondary diagnosed, but I have had chemo and depression so I do know a little of what you are going through. It's very common that people develop depression as a result of a BC experience, approx 50% of people I'm told....it's just that we don't talk about it very much which is a shame.
Firstly I just wanted to say that it's wonderful news that your blood test results are good. You're right, it's scary waiting for the next test, scan, results (whatever) and I know I get anxious about it all too. It' s something that we can't control and the reality is that it can get pretty damn frightening!
While everyone's experience is different I know, for me, talking about my feelings helped a great deal. It's great that you are seeing a psychologist through all this. I got sick of everyone saying "remain positive" because at times I felt really lousy, negative and down.....and to be honest, looking back I had every right to feel so! Any form of cancer SUCKS, so I allowed myself "off days" and tried to be really kind to myself. I took it really easy on myself and got back to basics....sitting in the garden watching the birds and listening to the windchime, writing in my journal with a cup of tea in hand, snoozing on the couch! I bought 2 guided meditation CDs which were great...one was for general meditation and relaxation and the other was a healing focus which I found very helpful in encouraging me to feel a bit more in control of the situation. I also saw a Naturopath for natural remedies compatible with my medical treatment, which helped me feel as though I was regaining some control over the situation. Like you I felt incredibly tired....just wanting to hide under the doona and sleep all day. It's wonderful to hear that you are starting to go for a walk each day...well done, that's a huge achievement! I find that energy feeds on itself, so even a 10 minute walk can give a huge boost! It'll be great if a support group gets up and going in your area too. Uplifting music, spending time with pets, reading a book (Lance Armstrong's "It's Not Just About the Bike" is a truely inspirational easy-to-read book....even if you aren't into cycling!!:-)
Anyway Carolyn, jusy wanted to say hi, to share with you some of my experiences and also to share with you one of my favourite quotes.... "Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass.....it's about learning to dance in the rain!" Bye for now, Celeste :-)
0 -
Hi Celeste,
I have read Lance Armstrong's book in the past, but I'll get it out of the library again as it was before cancer. I enjoy reading so if you can suggest any other inspirational books, I'll have a look out for them.
I like your quote. If only it would rain here! I reckon there's nothing like swimming in the rain, without lightning of course.
I'm heading into town tomorrow so I'll have a look for a meditation CD. I have got some other relaxing music ones, but of course my daughters don't like the music.
How long did it take for you to get over the depression? I find if I relax during the day it's really hard to get going again. I've made an appointment with my GP for Thursday as I don't feel I'm getting much better.
Thanks for your suggestions & I hope you've had a nice day.
Carolyn.
0 -
Hi Mel
How did the onc visit go yesterday? Hope it was great news and tumour(s) shrinking as they should. I agree, it is such a shock to imagine the cancer can come back after chemo, I mean isn't that it's job, to destroy it? Am glad they kicked in with the hormone treatment again and you don't have to have the chemo. Believe me if they thought it was necessary they would have you hooked up in no time lol. Haven't bought the champagne yet, waiting til I feel lil better. WAs a bit excited on Saturday knowing that it was the last one and No More!
Lynne
0
