Wobbly nearing the end of active treatment
19 days ago I had my bilateral mastectomy and reconstruction, last Friday I saw the oncologist, yesterday I saw the plastic surgeon and today I saw my breast surgeon. At the end of the appointment ...
Forum Discussion
Hey @kmakm,
It is a weird kind of feeling isn't it. You sort of swing between, thank goodness that's over and what on earth do I do now.
I remember that not knowing what I should be doing or feeling. Just drifting along for a while. No doctors, no appointments, no running off to radiation every day.
Life returned to pretty much normal over the next few months I guess and I had a hard time with my brain. Thoughts of the last year just circled around and around never letting up and I was sure I should be doing something bigger, better, grander. It's a second chance right? Sometimes I felt guilty that I wasn't doing anything spectacular.
It took a while but I finally realized that I should be thankful it went back to mostly normal. There are many that it doesn't do that for. I still do what I did before hand but the things that have changed are good things. My husband and I are closer than ever. We don't sweat the small stuff anymore and I do take time to stop, look and appreciate the things I was always too busy to notice. I make an effort to say yes to outings and trying new things that once I would have said I'm too busy to do that or I'm too scared to try that. (even if I am).
One thing that's may not be such a good trait is that I have very little sympathy for small issues. My husband had to go for a shoulder MRI and got really claustrophobic. They had to bring him out of the machine. I just laughed and told him to get back in there and stop being a sook.. Ooopps. I have to work on that.
I started to learn to play the guitar (still bloody hopeless) once I was healed enough to lean it against my chest. Something I had wanted to do for many years but never quite had the time. I now take an hour every afternoon to practice just for me. I find trying to learn new things helps with the Tamoxifog as well.
Sometimes all those small, seemingly insignificant things add up to a nice change anyway. You fought a war and won. That's enough for the moment. Take time for yourself to recover from the battle.
xoxoxoxoxo
It is a weird kind of feeling isn't it. You sort of swing between, thank goodness that's over and what on earth do I do now.
I remember that not knowing what I should be doing or feeling. Just drifting along for a while. No doctors, no appointments, no running off to radiation every day.
Life returned to pretty much normal over the next few months I guess and I had a hard time with my brain. Thoughts of the last year just circled around and around never letting up and I was sure I should be doing something bigger, better, grander. It's a second chance right? Sometimes I felt guilty that I wasn't doing anything spectacular.
It took a while but I finally realized that I should be thankful it went back to mostly normal. There are many that it doesn't do that for. I still do what I did before hand but the things that have changed are good things. My husband and I are closer than ever. We don't sweat the small stuff anymore and I do take time to stop, look and appreciate the things I was always too busy to notice. I make an effort to say yes to outings and trying new things that once I would have said I'm too busy to do that or I'm too scared to try that. (even if I am).
One thing that's may not be such a good trait is that I have very little sympathy for small issues. My husband had to go for a shoulder MRI and got really claustrophobic. They had to bring him out of the machine. I just laughed and told him to get back in there and stop being a sook.. Ooopps. I have to work on that.
I started to learn to play the guitar (still bloody hopeless) once I was healed enough to lean it against my chest. Something I had wanted to do for many years but never quite had the time. I now take an hour every afternoon to practice just for me. I find trying to learn new things helps with the Tamoxifog as well.
Sometimes all those small, seemingly insignificant things add up to a nice change anyway. You fought a war and won. That's enough for the moment. Take time for yourself to recover from the battle.
xoxoxoxoxo