@Shorelle so many of us know how you feel. I am a nurse working in palliative care, so I know how lucky I am to be now “cancer free” after an exhausting year of treatment, but I’m still pissed off it happened in the first place and by how much it has taken away from myself and my family. I feel like I have to put on a fake smile and be positive all the time for the benefit of those around me so that they don’t worry, but its just exhausting, and sometimes I’m so angry about this shit that I just want to punch something! If cancer was an entity I would take great pleasure in punching it in the face! I have a councillor at my breast clinic who I have seen through my breast clinic that I find benefits me greatly. I see her when I am ‘heavy’ with all of this and need to offload, at least this way my friends and family don’t have to cop it. All the best to you. It is so normal to feel the way you are feeling.