Things seem to happen in a very whirlwind way by necessity. Sometimes you need time to catch up. My journey started 2 months ago and is still going. I sent my surgeon some chocolates yesterday to thank for the care and kindness. Establishing a relationship with those people is hard. They are focussed on the immediate problem and sometimes forget that we are real people and we have back stories. I had to explain in my last session that I had a stressful job and I just didn't think I could do chemo whilst working. What i didn't get the time to say is that ive been a near workaholic five years and have been trying unsuccessfully to raise up my health. It feels a bit like this happened gor a reason- yo get me to listen. A hard lesson. My gp has been nervous talking about feelings, phobias. Are they afraid? I will probably get counselling at some point. This forum is really excellent with many wise experienced people. All the best.