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Summer_Prevails's avatar
7 years ago

How do you handle the big anniversaries?

Hey everyone

Its the first anniversary of my surgery date tomorrow; the fateful day I parted ways with what was left of my tumour, a third of my breast, and about 23 lymph nodes. 

I always try to be brave on the anniversary of a scary/sad day but it usually falls apart and is very emotional and teary anyway. 

How do you deal with those days that are a significant anniversary to you? Like the last chemo date, or your diagnosis day? How do you process the full year behind them and does it make you cry? 

xo 




28 Replies

  • I usually don’t do anything on the day, bit  like @Zoffiel.  Maybe in the first year after diagnosis. I was always a bit paranoid about celebrating, sounds weird hey. However I did have a recurrence 18mths after 1st diagnosis. What I do now is wait until my annual surgeon appointment (7 year since second diagnosis coming up). Then I wait until I see if she orders any tests etc, then if she does, I wait until I have results, and then when they are all good or if she doesn’t order any I excitedly text everyone important to me and have a quiet drink in celebration that I am alive and well another year I didn’t think I would be. 
    Paula xx
  • Patti J - Good option! I could be crying over a delicious piece of lumpectomy themed cake instead of old photos, I’m SO making cake tomorrow. 

    Kiwi Angel Thankyou, hugs always help :)

    Zoffiel, I like your philosophy. It might be a case for me of being too green in the BC timeline...the dates are all still burned into my memory. Somehow even though I completely zone out and forget to go to my bloody Zoladex appointment, I remember the terror of bad days with perfect clarity  :s




  • I don't. I can hardly remember my birthday, and could not think of anything worse than remembering a distressing date. All my '''anniversaries" are marked in my cancer diary but I never refer to them. I'm still here, time is marked in weeks, months and eventually years as I move on.
  • Every year on the anniversary of my mastectomy I have made a white coconut cake with bright pink coconut icing. I then take it to work for everyone else to eat. 
  • I haven't got there yet but I suspect that 5 December (diagnosis) is always going to stay with me.  However, 8 January is a much better one as that was the second surgery that got the bugger cut out.
  • I hadn't thought of it like that @Rose18. I'm not at the six months since diagnosis yet, but a quick mental survey says while I'll probably always remember that day, I'd chose to raise a glass on the 27th April. That's the day the last of the cancer cells were evicted and I got my new body. Can't see myself doing anything actively celebratory but you never know!
  • Anonymous's avatar
    Anonymous
    I did something fun on the anniversary and that was my focus. I found I usually forgot anniversaries. Which do you focus on? diagnosis, surgery, chemo, radio or completing treatment. I think it’s good to acknowledge it, then try to move on. It’s not easy. I had a lot of other stressful stuff going on so that helped to distract me. All the best. It gets easier with time. 
  • @"Holly Prevails" I’m still in the thick of this is something I will be thinking about this time next year. Sending u big hugs for tomorrow though. Maybe do something to treat yourself. xoxoxo