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Nadi's avatar
Nadi
Member
9 years ago

Feeling pretty crappy today

Today I just need to vent. I have had a really bad month with non cancer stuff. I have been off work since Sept 12 after collapsing at work a few times. I also had to stop going to the gym because my blood pressure which used to be very high but was controlled with 2 types of meds is now really low causing me to pass out a lot. I almost get that under control and now I have suspected pneumonia. I have never been as sick as this in my life before - not even when I was hospitalised with an infection and was neutropenic during chemo. God it hurts to breathe and it's majorly painful when I cough. I have not been out of bed for 4 days straight but I am supposed to see my breast surgeon this afternoon. I don't think I am well enough to go but if I don't go I won't see her until late December. The only good thing about currently being sick is that a lack of appetite has meant continued weight loss - down 17.5 kgs since chemo finished.

Heaps of other not so good stuff going on including my dad getting lost and injured last week. I hate Alzheimer's more than I hate cancer. But I won't bore you with all that.

On the upside my garden is looking beautiful, all of my chickens are laying and it has finally stopped raining. Sometimes the simplest things give you a lift. Also, only 2 more herceptins to go and my port worked last week for the third time in a row, so there's something. Yay! 
coping
emotions
  • Jane_Elizabeth's avatar
    Jane_Elizabeth
    Member
    9 years ago
    Sorry you are feeling so crook. Concentrating so hard on beating cancer can sometimes make you forget there's other stuff to deal with as well, until it taps you on the shoulder, or punches you in the guts. Wishing you the best for a speedy recovery from the pneumonia, so you can get out there and enjoy your garden.
  • Ne's avatar
    Ne
    Member
    9 years ago
    Oh Nadi, life can be cruel.  I do hope you get more sunshine over everything that feels so dark in your life and that you will bounce back from these setbacks stronger than ever.  Hang in there hun x
  • Tracey62's avatar
    Tracey62
    Member
    9 years ago
    Hi Nadi, doesn't it just suck? We've finished chemo & rads, life should be on the improve, yet here we are left with no energy, no immunity and open to every bug that goes around. Think I had rose-glass visions of life after treatment, but the reality has been disappointing. I've had 4 chest infections since back at work 6 months and found that if you splint your back against a chair and hold your elbows in close to your ribs, the coughing isn't as painful. Lots of rest, lots of fluids, lots of love from your family. Well done on the weight loss, I'm still working on that. Sending you gentle hugs and a sincere hope for better days, love Tracey xXx
  • iserbrown's avatar
    iserbrown
    Member
    9 years ago
    Hi Nadi  -   your headline Feeling Crappy hit a nerve with me and I am sure it did with most.  Goodness you are still in the realms of doing it tough and venting is a good way of releasing some of the frustration.  Isn't it a so and so that our bodies rebel and can be difficult to cope with!

    Hopefully you can find the energy to keep your breast surgeon appointment otherwise you'll be in the world of, if only I went!

    Sending you a virtual hug and wishing you better days!
    Take care from Christine xx
  • SusieQ2's avatar
    SusieQ2
    Member
    9 years ago
    Hi Nadi,
    I just wanted to say hello and give you a virtual hug :)  I often feel so isolated and alone with everything that goes on with me in my world and just cannot even manage to get out of bed some days and while I don't wish this on anyone, it's kinda reassuring to know that others have crappy days too.  Thank you for sharing this!  I am so glad you can find something in your day, however small, that you can be positive about .. that's my mantra, it only has to be something as small as being able to pick up all the clothes on my bedroom floor so I can see carpet when I am laying in bed to make my day :) . 

    I hope you keep your appointment today, phone the clinic, let them know you are coming but not up to it, hopefully they will look out for you and help you through your appointment. 

    One day, when I have the energy, I might see my garden under all the weeds ....
    Susie x
  • Brenda5's avatar
    Brenda5
    Member
    9 years ago
    When I had a viral pneumonia as a kid, they tilted my bed feet up so the infection would stay up the top of the lungs and not settle down lower. I also had hours of sessions of nurses cupping their palms and paddling all up and down my back to loosen the stuff in my lungs so I could cough it up. I also had an ice bath to get my temp down quick. Now that was nasty. Once the doctor got on to the right antibiotics I started to recover.
    You would think for Alzheimer's people they could have a tracker anklet with a certain range which would beep an alarm on your phone if it breached the containment range. They have something like that for dog collars, why not people with an anklet? Give the breast surgeon a miss today and reschedule.
  • Mira's avatar
    Mira
    Member
    9 years ago
    Alzheimers is horrid, we had a neighbour with it when I was living on acreage.  It was such a worry when he went wandering! 

    I hope you feel better soon.  My garden is bursting with petunias at the moment :)