Forum Discussion

2MC's avatar
2MC
Member
5 years ago

Fear of recurrence



after being diagnosed early January 2020 with stage 2 TNBC 
First went through chemotherapy then lumpectomy and finished in September with Radiation 

all my results came back with great results no lymph node activity clear margins and full pathological response to treatment 

I was coping quite well with day to day life after much Counselling 
until I went for my recent 3 month appointment with specialist 
I got a student Dr who was adamant I had a new lump.
as I lay there on the bed waiting for my actual specialist to come and check me over my mind was going crazy with the worst kind of thoughts 
My specialist of 40 years experience checked my breast and said there is no lump and told the student Dr to remove the notes from my record and the reassured my husband and I it was only normal breast tissue 

I have been a mess now for over a week and have examined my breast now 3 times or more a day finding lumps that now seem bigger and hurt
is my anxiety taking over?
I called the cancer council and they recommended to stop self examination’s for a bit and believe my specialist 
my Mammogram 1st since diagnosis isn’t until February and the specialist doesn’t see me again until mid February 

sorry for long rant (Anxiety does this) x
anxiety
recurrence
  • 2MC's avatar
    2MC
    Member
    5 years ago
    @Afraser
    thank you for your fast response I’ve really needed some advice from a survivor 
    Im going to see my GP as I can’t straight contact specialist 
    cancer council told me I couldn’t rush ahead and have mammogram as things after radiation and surgery need to settle down first
    and that’s why specialist has set a particular date
    she also said I could be feeling a lot of normal changes to breast tissue after all it’s been through 
    I feel I’ve lost my faith
    all my joints have ached since chemotherapy after long walks especially my digest system has only just got back on track 
    I fear if I had to have chemo so soon after the 1st time I wouldn’t survive 

    sorry if I’m putting to much out there/ asking to much of you xx
  • Afraser's avatar
    Afraser
    Member
    5 years ago
    I know students have to learn but......it seems to take a long time to realise the practice object is sentient, not deaf and may grant the student greater knowledge than he/she has. You can take your specialist’s advice and stop worrying but, as he/she will know, test and scan anxiety is a real thing, and you have already had counselling, so easier said than done! Or try and have a mammogram as soon as possible, which should be possible if your specialist recommends it (for your peace of mind not because his/her assessment is wrong). After all, your specialist presumably allowed the student access! Best wishes.