@arpie I just read your answer outloud to my husband. He said "Quite right". It is the gist of everyone's advice and I will endeavour to take it. It will require quite some mental discipline. She is my sister after all, who I love. However this whole BC experience is teaching me, forcing me to make changes. In this case, which is so complicated, it will be mostly internal. I will work on some of @SoldierCrab's circle and square imagery, and try to apply some of @Primek, @Romla and @Sister's cool restraint. This new normal stuff is a lot of work!
You have a tremendous lot on your plate. But you sound a lot more sorted than me. Does the ukelele give you special powers?!
Thank you for the hugs, gratefully received and sending some straight back. K xox