@Bbryce - I am so sorry to hear of the loss of your Mum and the dementia as well - is the pits to have to deal with.
You have surely been thru the mill tho - and that is hardly fair, on top of everything else you've had to go thru. Out of interest - have your blood sugars been checked as well recently? Diabetes is famous for affecting feet & toes & lower legs. My husband developed it after surgery & chemo - we don't know if it is tied in to his treatment - but he is skinny as a rake & a totally 100% fit athlete - so does not fit the general profile.
Big hugs to both you and @AllyJay Take care xx