Forum Discussion
BelindaM
14 years agoMember
Secondaries
I am dealing with secondaries...I'm not going to lie to you it is shit! planning your own funeral...crap! Telling your kids you won't see them grow up! totally, utterly gut wrenching crap!
Dealing with the fact that cancer is going to kill me! utterly, completely CRAP!
People telling me I should just stay positive "wanting to punch them in the face" CRAPPITY CRAP CRAP CRAP!!!
46 Replies
- JJoyMember
Dear Belinda,
We are here for you. And YES! that 'thinking positive' stuff is great in theory for those who aren't going through ths crap. Some of my family have stopped speaking to me, they think 'I'm all better now', but you are experiencing what we all fear the most. I tried to talk to my family about funerals and stuff and they tell me "Don't talk about that sort of thing"............ok, I'll just walk off and whistle like nothing is any different, you know stick my head in the sand. I pray dearly that things pick up for you and remember as I said "We are here for you" Vent your little cotton socks off, it's ok by us - love and hugs from Josie x x x
- FDMember
You are amazing Belinda, so inspiring and strong. I am so happy to hear you blogging and I'm praying for some more good news without the puzzles. It sucks you are going to have to lose your hair yet again I can understand why it worries your girls too. Lucky you have such a beautiful face to compensate. Stay strong and well and continue enjoying and loving your wonderful family. You are living and appreciating life now more than some ever do in a life time. Well done you clever chicken. Hugs Lara xx
- BelindaMMember
Hi ladies, THANK YOU so much for your support...I asked one of the leading Breast cancer Oncologoists in Australia about Avastin and she said she doesn't think it will work for me as I have not to responded to the other 4 types of aggressive hormone suppressing therapy they have tried so she doesn't think it will be of any benefit to me :O(
I am loving having hubby home! Although he is ready to go get a job...any job! LOL After 2 weeks of being a house husband! LOL He said to me "I get no time for myself! it's all just cooking, cleaning, washing and cleaning up mess!" ahhh yeah! Welacome to the last 10 years of my life! :D
Have been trrying CMF for the last 4 months with mixed results...my WCC isn't recovering well and the last CT results were mixed...chest, lung & pluera mets stable and some have shunk! YAY! BUT Liver mets have increased in size and number...but the large one I had 7.5 cm (ran through the lung and into the liver) in November is gone....very puzzling?...so I am having an ultrasound this week to see what is going on...Am switching to weekly Abraxane next week,...not looking forward to losing my hair for the THIRD time in 3 years! It really upsets my girls...my son (he's 10) thinks it's cool cause I look kinda army LOL..
So since I am losing my hair soon...had some family photos done on the weekend...it was so lovely, gorgeous location, photography was lovely, beautiful spirit :O)....Just enjoying the gorgeous Brisbane weather we had and enjoying each others company :O) ,
Have also been diagnosed with mixed connective tissue disease/Lupus and auto immune arthritis :O( ..BUT the silver lining is that the Dr's currently think that at least 2 of the liver tumors and some of the chest ones may be benign tumors linked to thte Lupus...we shall see....
Enjoying each day with my family and friends as best as I can :D
.LOVE TO YOU ALL m Pink Sisters xoxox
- BelindaMMember
Hi ladies, THANK YOU so much for your support...I asked one of the leading Breast cancer Oncologoists in Australia about Avastin and she said she doesn't think it will work for me as I have not to responded to the other 4 types of aggressive hormone suppressing therapy they have tried so she doesn't think it will be of any benefit to me :O(
I am loving having hubby home! Although he is ready to go get a job...any job! LOL After 2 weeks of being a house husband! LOL He said to me "I get no time for myself! it's all just cooking, cleaning, washing and cleaning up mess!" ahhh yeah! Welacome to the last 10 years of my life! :D
Have been trrying CMF for the last 4 months with mixed results...my WCC isn't recovering well and the last CT results were mixed...chest, lung & pluera mets stable and some have shunk! YAY! BUT Liver mets have increased in size and number...but the large one I had 7.5 cm (ran through the lung and into the liver) in November is gone....very puzzling?...so I am having an ultrasound this week to see what is going on...Am switching to weekly Abraxane next week,...not looking forward to losing my hair for the THIRD time in 3 years! It really upsets my girls...my son (he's 10) thinks it's cool cause I look kinda army LOL..
So since I am losing my hair soon...had some family photos done on the weekend...it was so lovely, gorgeous location, photography was lovely, beautiful spirit :O)....Just enjoying the gorgeous Brisbane weather we had and enjoying each others company :O) ,
Have also been diagnosed with mixed connective tissue disease/Lupus and auto immune arthritis :O( ..BUT the silver lining is that the Dr's currently think that at least 2 of the liver tumors and some of the chest ones may be benign tumors linked to thte Lupus...we shall see....
Enjoying each day with my family and friends as best as I can :D
.LOVE TO YOU ALL m Pink Sisters xoxox
- vilmaNaMember
yeh that's true.
Right know St George Hospital is providing that trial.Im on it. IT WORKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Almost no side effects. That drug is for HER positive BC and if u had only 1 line of Tykerb+Zeloda and multiple lines of chemo. If interested message me Ill send u more info or I may ask my trial coordinator what do u need to do to be qulified for this trail
- vilmaNaMember
yeh that's true.
Right know St George Hospital is providing that trial.Im on it. IT WORKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Almost no side effects. That drug is for HER positive BC and if u had only 1 line of Tykerb+Zeloda and multiple lines of chemo. If interested message me Ill send u more info or I may ask my trial coordinator what do u need to do to be qulified for this trail
- vilmaNaMember
Hi Belinda
I'm fighting that secondary s*** almost 6 years. Never give up!Never! Since then i had a stroke, developed diabetes, Im spending as minimum a week each month in hospital... yeh it is exhousting it is not a good life,but it is still a Life... I wanted to die when I had a stroke I though this is the end.. but then why i would so easy give up...? im wishing u all the best. keep fighting for u and for ur kids.
- FDMember
Might be worth a look. Hope you are feeling OK, you are often in my thoughts.
Still praying
Laraxx
- AmyMemberHi Belinda I am a fellow ABCer and also have young children. I understand where you are coming from. Enjoy your family and (where possible) cut out those who stress you out. Be kind to yourself. Amy x
- AmyMemberHi Belinda I am a fellow ABCer and also have young children. I understand where you are coming from. Enjoy your family and (where possible) cut out those who stress you out. Be kind to yourself. Amy x