Forum Discussion
positive3negati
10 years agoMember
Before You Reclaim Your Curves
There's a new pink charity on the block. It's called 'Reclaim Your Curves' and it aims to provide support and information to women seeking breast reconstruction following mastectomy.
Here's their web site:
http://www.reclaimyourcurves.org.au
It's a worthy aim. The choices we make following mastectomy are intensely personal and the provision of more information to women can only be a good thing, right? Well......maybe.
Impartial information that allows women to make an informed decision is a wonderful thing. If only this charity was impartial. Instead, it seemed to be more of a promotional site for breast reconstruction.
For those of us that chose not to go down the reconstruction path, some of the language is disturbing (if not offensive). On the home page of their website there's a short slide show explaining statistics. It tells us that 17 Australian women will be told today that they need a mastectomy but that "only two of these women will restore their bodies".
Wait..... Restore?
Then there's a cute video of women that chose reconstruction talking about how happy and proud they are with their choices. There's nothing about the down side. No comment from women that chose not to have the surgery, or women that had it and regretted it. It's a very one sided presentation accompanied by cheery music. Breast reconstruction; what's not to love?
On the page 'Get started with breast reconstruction' there's this comment:
"Breast reconstruction offers you the opportunity to get back something that breast cancer has taken away."
Which would be true if reconstruction gave you back your breasts. But let's be honest. It doesn't. It gives you back a mound of fat and/or tissue transplanted from another part of your body that approximates a breast, or an implant that approximates a breast. But nothing can really give you back your breasts.
And then there's your nipples. When people ask me if I miss my breasts I can honestly say that I don't, but oh how I miss my nipples. Reconstruction can't give me back the sensation of my husband kissing them or touching them.
Reconstructed breasts can never have the same sensation as real breasts. It's interesting that in the section under 'Myths about breast reconstruction' myth number six reads:
"Reconstructed breasts have no feeling"
Which might lead you to believe that reconstructed breasts have normal sensation. But they don't. Read on and the comment below this 'myth' is ambiguous.
"Women who have natural tissue reconstruction tend to regain more sensation than women who have breast implants, because nerve endings in the chest (if they are not damaged during mastectomy) sometimes spontaneously connect with nerve endings in the flap."
Sometimes. So not always. Not even 'often'. And implants not at all. Once again the language seriously downplays one of the significant issues involved in reconstruction; it's extremely likely that you'll have reduced sensation in your chest area regardless of which procedure you choose.
Another of the listed 'myths' is this one:
"Reconstructed breasts don’t look natural"
which includes the comment:
"Many women have reconstructed breasts that cannot be distinguished from natural breasts."
I'm assuming this claim relates to the way reconstructed breast look in clothing. When I was researching breast construction I looked at all the photos I could find. The results varied from good to horrific but not once did I see a result that looked like natural breasts. I also saw plenty of reconstructions that would not have looked good under tight clothing. There are no guarantees.
Here's a link to a site that contains some photographs of reconstructions so you can draw your own conclusions:
Keep in mind that these are considered to be good results.
The Reclaim Your Curves site is honest about the possibility of repeat surgery to achieve an acceptable result but once again, the risks are downplayed. Every single surgery carries risk and more surgery increases that risk. Women need to know that.
The site compares reconstruction rates in Australia with the UK and the USA and makes this comment:
"The Australian Society of Plastic Surgeons (ASPS) believes the comparatively low rate in Australia points to a lack of awareness of what is involved, and the procedure itself, as well as the lack of support services in regional, rural and remote populations."
How about the possibility that rates are low because many of us considered our choices and chose not to have reconstruction?
Then there's the very real concern about vested interests. The members of the Australian College of Plastic Surgeons have financial reasons for promoting breast reconstruction. And notice it's their 'belief'. It's not a conclusion based on research.
Here's some research:
http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/12621175
What they found was this:
"The results indicate that breast reconstruction is not a universal panacea for the emotional and psychological consequences of mastectomy. Women still reported feeling conscious of altered body image 1 year postoperatively, regardless of whether or not they had elected breast reconstruction. Health professionals should be careful of assuming that breast reconstruction necessarily confers psychological benefits compared with mastectomy alone."
Then there's the added concern that some of the sponsors of this site also rely upon breast reconstruction as a revenue stream. One of their major sponsors is Airxpanders, a company that makes a product used in implant surgery. There's a clear conflict of interest.
My primary concern with this charity is that the tone and content seem to be strongly supportive of breast reconstruction. This is not a site that provides impartial information. The risks and complications associated with surgery are downplayed and there's no comparison between reconstruction vs no reconstruction. It's assumed that reconstruction is the way to go.
I suppose that Reclaim Your Curves could respond by saying that they assume any woman coming to their site has already decided she wants reconstruction, but I doubt that's the case. I'm sure that there are many uncertain visitors seeking information. They deserve to know all their options.
The site includes lots of quotes from women happy with their reconstruction, and none from those that aren't. Once again I feel this creates a false impression. Yes, reconstruction can be a wonderful choice for some people but it can also be a disastrous choice for others. An informed decision can only be made when women are given all of the information.
Then there's this:
"Most women who have undergone reconstructive procedures are happy with their results and glad they pursued it. Lots of women get through with no problems at all, while other ladies unfortunately have some hiccups along the way, so it is good to get a realistic idea of what can be achieved and also how the stages might play out before you embark on this part of the journey."
I think 'hiccups' seriously downplays the very real risks. This quote is from the section 'Working out what you want' which, once again, includes no information about why a woman might choose not to have reconstruction. Also, working out what you want apparently doesn't require you to have a full appreciation of the risks associated with each procedure.
The only reference I could find to the risks is in their 'myths' section. The myth in this case is 'Something always goes wrong' and the advice says this:
"Any surgery has a potential for complications, and breast reconstruction is no exception. Most women who have breast reconstruction, however, do not experience problems. Serious problems are uncommon, but the risk of infection, a negative reaction to anesthesia, delayed wound healing, excessive bleeding, hematoma, seroma and an unsatisfactory cosmetic result are possibilities. (Another good reason to find a skilled and experienced surgeon for your procedure.)"
Notice how the language states that serious problems are uncommon but gives no statistics. What's uncommon? One in one hundred? One in twenty? I'd like to know before I submitted to a medical procedure of any kind. I'm also concerned that the language implies that a skilled and experienced surgeon is the way to avoid any problems. Yes, it's ambiguous language and you could read it either way, but my concern is that even the most skilled of surgeons makes mistakes.
I'd like to make the case that providing women with support to make decisions about reconstruction should include sound advice based on facts and research. It should include all of the options available to women, including the option of not having reconstruction.
To their credit, a recent 'Reclaim Your Curves' event listed someone who was 'flat and fabulous' as one of the speakers, but she never appeared. The only explanation given was that she had been booked to speak but was unavailable.
The information evening has glowing reviews on their web site but to some of those attending it had disturbing shades of a sales promotion. An elderly woman was told that it was never too late to have reconstruction and there was a smattering of applause. No mention of the risks that this surgery would have for someone her age. A doctor reassured everyone that there was a "95% success rate" when it came to reconstruction.
But you see, a 95% success rate means that one in twenty women had a failed reconstruction. The presenter brushed away questions about failures with an acknowledgement that it wasn't pretty and the audience didn't want to know about it.
But the audience should know about the failures. They should understand what happens when the body rejects transplanted tissue or implants. They should know about the incidence of staph infections in hospitals and the risks associated with anaesthetic. To deny women this information is to deny them their right to a fully informed decision.
When I made the decision not to have reconstruction and wrote about it, I received lots of messages from people about that post. In the interest of balancing out the highly positive comments on the Reclaim Your Curves site, here's a selection of comments from another perspective:
"I don't think they should call it breast reconstruction. I didn't get breasts. I got numb mounds on the front of my body. They never felt like part of me."
"It makes me angry when I read comments about women reclaiming their femininity. I'm not less feminine without breasts."
"My reconstruction was a disaster. My body rejected the tissue and it became stinky and rotten. They had to cut more of my body away to get rid of the infection. The pain and the scarring were terrible. I wish I'd just had a mastectomy and left it at that."
"Nobody told me how painful it would be. I had a morphine pump after the surgery and even though I used it I was still in the most terrible pain. The nurses told me it was normal. I still have nightmares."
"It was just assumed I'd want a reconstruction. It wasn't discussed with me. I didn't get a choice. When I healed from my mastectomy I had these flaps of skin that the surgeon said would make reconstruction easier. But I didn't want reconstruction. Now I'm trying to decide if I should risk more surgery or just live with the results."
"The healthiest choice for me was to just have the mastectomy. I wanted to get my life back to normal as soon as possible."
"After reconstruction I couldn't exercise for months. I gained a lot of weight and that's had a serious impact on my health. I get anxious about how my weight affects my cancer risk."
"I decided to have the mastectomy and just wear foobs. After a couple of months of messing about with bras and padding and prosthetics I just stopped worrying about it."
"If you look at me you wouldn't know if I'd had a mastectomy or if I'm just naturally flat chested. I've done weights to build up my chest muscles and I think I have a nice athletic shape now. I don't miss having breasts at all."
and finally, the saddest message I received, from the husband of a woman that underwent breast reconstruction:
"Katie wasn't sure about reconstruction and even though I had my doubts I encouraged her to do what ever she wanted. There were complications and she lost a lot of blood. Then she got infected and became very ill. I was beside her in the hospital when she died and all I could think was that if I'd told her not to have it, or that I didn't want her to have it, she'd still be with me."
This brave man now spends some of his time telling his story and encouraging people to consider the small but very real risk of death that comes with reconstruction surgery. He tells me he's particularly concerned about any message that implies that men will have a preference for reconstruction;
"It wouldn't have made any difference to me. To be honest, I found the idea of moving part of her body up to her chest a bit freaky, but I wanted to support her so I never said anything. I wouldn't have loved her less without breasts."
It is possible to provide clear and unbiased advice about breast reconstruction and a number of sites already do this. This site (BCNA) has great reconstruction advice here:
https://www.bcna.org.au/understanding-breast-cancer/treatment/breast-reconstruction
It's clear and impartial advice that supports the right of all women to make whatever choice best serves them, including the decision to not have reconstruction (although there is a link to the Reclaim Your Curves site).
And the UK cancer research site has this:
Both sites are, in my opinion, much better sources of advice on breast reconstruction. The BCNA site openly considers the possibility that a woman may not want reconstruction and the UK site is very clear about the possible complications associated with any kind of reconstruction procedure.
It will be interesting to monitor the progress of this charity. In particular, it will be interesting to see where their funding comes from and how it's spent. There's a case to be made for diverting the funding that this charity attracts to other more needy causes, particularly given the clear vested interests of some of the supporters and participants.
Ultimately my issue is with providing all women with freedom of choice. I fully support any woman's decision to have reconstruction if it helps her to recover from the physical and psychological impact of breast cancer, but anyone making this decision should have a full appreciation of the risks, the facts and the potential for things to go horribly wrong.
Reclaim Your Curves does not, in my opinion, provide unbiased information. In fact it's a very much a case of 'me think thou dost protest too much'. To put it another way, there's an awful lot of justification for having reconstruction and not a lot of information on the risks or potential complications.
If you're faced with the inevitability of a mastectomy then reconstruction should certainly be one of the options you consider, but you should have balanced and unbiased information that supports what ever decision you ultimately make.
You shouldn't feel ashamed of your choice to have reconstruction, or your choice to NOT have reconstruction. There are pros and cons for both. Interestingly, the most recent piece of research I've seen reported that women choosing reconstruction did so for aesthetic reasons, and women choosing not to have reconstruction did so for health reasons.
This is entirely consistent with my own experience. Having researched breast reconstruction I ultimately decided that I wouldn't have it. I don't deny that it's been wonderful for many women but it wasn't for me.
The case in favour of having the least amount of surgery with the shortest possible recovery time is worth considering. And that's how my husband summed it up. He was incredibly supportive and determined to let me make up my own mind, but when I ultimately decided on a mastectomy without reconstruction he admitted his relief.
"I know I would have dealt with it, but the idea of moving your tummy to your chest was freaking me out. There's just something not right about it. You are not your breasts. I love you. I want you well. I want you well as soon as possible, without more surgery and more surgery after that. I won't love you less without breasts and I'm proud of you for making a decision that gave you the least possible surgery and the shortest possible recovery time. Your health is my top priority. Not your appearance."
Yes. That's what it comes down to. My core values are about my health. Not my appearance. Breast reconstruction would have meant longer surgery, greater risk, longer recovery and the possibility of additional surgeries and all of those associated risks. And for what? Something approximating breasts but not really breasts.
I know there are women that think of their reconstructed breasts as real breasts. I also know that I wouldn't feel this way about them. My friend Leonie summed it up this way:
"For me, breast reconstruction was the equivalent of giving me a stuffed toy to replace my pet dog after it had died. My breasts are gone and I would rather deal honestly with the reality of that than pretend that any kind of surgery can replace them. It can't."
I know that not everyone feels this way, but Leonie, me, and plenty of other women do. Our experience is no less valid or relevant than the experience of those women happy with reconstruction. It is certainly validated by the many women that have subjected their bodies to reconstruction only to regret it.
If you're considering reconstruction then please know this; Not having it is a legitimate choice. If you're feeling like that option isn't on the table then speak up. Ask questions. Ask doctors to give you information about the difference it makes to your recovery time, your pain, your risks, your potential complication and your long term health. Make the decision that best helps you to recover but know that there are many of us out here that chose not to have reconstruction because we didn't think the risks were worth it or we didn't think the results justified the cost to our health.
I don't need to reclaim my curves. I still have curves. I just don't have breasts. And I'm very happy about that.
Reposted from my blog at https://positive3neg.wordpress.com
a continuing story of my recovery from triple negative breast cancer
21 Replies
- jd48Member
I think whatever one devicides we need to be respectfull of thebchoice and the decisionmaking process.
But yes, it is such a minefield... i only had a lumpectomy - having said 'only' the chunk that was taken out was a size of a large fist as my tumor was large and I have boobs that are now 2 sizes apart....
Funnily enough I never ever before the surgery considered having a reconstruction regardless of the pricedure that would be done or the difference in size. All I could think was "I want this rubbish out". I could not in my wildest dreams consider putting something foreign into my body after facing the teality of a cancer growing in there as is.
What I found even more weird is that the zecond I was informed I had BC in the Breast Screen centre the surgeon in the very next word told me that offcourse I could have reconstructive surgery then he continued to discuss the biopsy they were about to perfom I found it a bit offensive that he thought that he needed to inform me I could be reconstructed before discussing the damn cancer and the process of dealing with it.
While looking for a surgeon I spoke with my Gyno who I also wanted to talk to for an unbiased opinion on lumpectomy vs mastectomy and also the moment I told him about my diagnosis he proceeded to tell me not to worry as dealing with BC these days is so much safer and advanced and that once it was out there were so many options for reconstruction that nobody need ever know I had surgery.
I know he meant well but that too upset me. I told him I would never consider an option of having an implant of any kind so for me that would not be an option regardless of the procedure only to have him reassure me yet again that after the treatments that is something reconstructive surgeon would discuss with me and I need not form any opinions yet.
I know that some feel that it is important to have the reconstruction and honestly I respect that. We all need to do whatever we need to do to feel right. But the way everyone dealt with me does make me think that many get pushed into it without realising it. I had a similar talk from the breast care nurse and had to shut her up on the topic and same with the surgeon...
It is almost like everyone is assuming we have to look the same afterwards so they rush us to have it. And they all speak of it in a way that makes one feel there is something wrong with them for not wanting reconstruction.
I never wanted it yet started thinking there was sometjing wrong with me and that I should be considering it.
Everyone had me second guessing myself in thinking there was nothing wrong with me having 2 differently sized and shaled boobs.
I still did not consider having it but the way everyone spoke of it assuming I should have one did start to make me feel I would be 'deffective' without it and I have to say that got me angry.
If I lost a finger a limb or a part of any other muscle people would not assume I should have reconstructive surgery to get the appearance or normallity. People consider surgery to get function back and not just for the appearance sake so why is it that when it comes to boobs we are made to feel defective for losing part or all of it.
Just because guys consider them sexual there should be no pressure or even assumtion one should be reconstructing it. Again - I respect choice to have it but I do feel many women do not choose it but are pushed into having it for fear of feeling 'not normal'.
I also agree that it should not be spoken off a something that is 'normal' and almost expected.
We can be whatever we are. We can have boobs or not have them. We can be curvey and then not. There is nothing wrong with it.
I know that I am just in the very start of a very long road but damned it once the chemo radiation and tablets are done as I continue to fight this thing and then to keep on looking over my shoulder worrying if there is more if it in my body and if it will come back I know I will be different. I will be different emotionally and psychologically so if those 2 are different then I may as well be different physically. So what if one boob is smaller and lopsided... Heck - surgery was tough and recovery no picnic so I intend to wear that lopsided trimmed boob as badge of honour.
I just hope that other women do not end up being made to feel like there is something wrong with them if they are not considering surgery and that they do not feel they are unattavtive or not womenly or curvey just because their boobs were affected (or removed).
We are way way way more than just the sum of our parts and monody should be considering surgery casually...
- emmypMember
Well said Fiona. The choice to reconstruct or not reconstruct is a very pesonal decision that can be made by you and you only. We are all smart women who will weigh up the information, we read, we hear and we are given. Whats right for me and why might not be right for anyone else but whats important is that we provide support for each other either way. Emma
Thanks so much for the post. It has given me a lot to think about, and as with any big decision, it will be one of many sources of information I will use.
I was particularly struck by your reference to losing not just breasts, but nipples, a fact which I had not even twigged to until after my mastectomy. Some facts just seem to get obliterated by the term "breast" cancer.
I also wonder how intertwined external and internal concepts of beauty are for women, and about our value as "seen" objects, and how this relates to why we chose certain ways of presenting ourselves to the outside world.
Thanks anyway for the blog, and for the info.
Jane
- fionafMember
I am not trivialising regarding women's health as I experienced the confrontation of cancer personally and have been to many friends funerals who have died from this insidious disease - I just feel that comments need to be made in a more supportive manner and not so much as a lecture. Please don't underestimate the consideration woman make before they choose either way.
Thanks for your comment Fiona and I agree with you. We are all entitled to to make our own decisions and we do deserve support regardless of what choices we make.
The private breast reconstruction group is an excellent place to exchange information with other women and thanks to Georginamary for mentioning it and for sharing her experience.
Fiona, it's not my intention to 'bat one against the other' and you'll notice that I've recommended other resources for women considering reconstruction. My concerns with this particular site are legitimate and the fact that it is well intentioned (I don't doubt that it is) doesn't change the fact that it seriously downplays the risks associated with these procedures.
This is not at all like private vs public education or stay at home vs working mums because women's health (and in some cases their lives) are at stake.
I have, and always will, support any woman's right to have any form of reconstruction but we deserve to make informed decisions.
Thanks so much for your feedback Deanne. I was just thinking the same thing this morning; the research we need is the study that asks women if they felt well informed before they made their choice and if they are happy with their choice. Information given to women needs to provide honest information about all of the choices available to them.
I also agree with your observation that it's become a minefield. I was very mindful of that when I wrote the post and not a little anxious about the kind of comments I might receive. In the end I decided that I felt strongly enough about this issue to risk it. I was prompted by a message I received via my blog the other day from another of the many women who feel they weren't offered the option of NOT having reconstruction.
- fionafMember
I think you will find that the 'reclaim your curves' Facebook site is facilitated by Louise Turner who is also involved with this 'Reclaim your curves' new website.
I also think that she doing this with good intentions to help women make an informed choice.
i think to 'reconstruct or not to reconstruct' is an extremely personal and difficult decision. But continuing to bat one against the other is a waste of energy and is becoming a bit like the 'public verses private education' or 'working mums verses stay at home mums'
I am not trivialising this argument but please we need to support each other with whatever decision is made. I myself have had reconstruction with implants and of course they do not feel natural, sometimes I even wish I could just take them off at night because they annoy me but I have no regrets and I feel incredibly grateful to have had an amazing surgeon who gave me the choice.
the more information we can get (good or not so good outcomes) then the better for making rdecisions. On a final note I have seen some fabulous results in regards to own tissue reconstruction.
Worth the risks that come with surgery?? Only you can make that final decision.
- DeanneMember
That should read "minefield". Don't you love auto correct?
I guess it just comes down to asking lots of questions of lots of different people until you are sure you have the complete picture of your choices. There are no right or wrong absolutes just lots of individual situations.
- GeorginaMaryMember
I also intended to say that there is a closed secure group on Facebook called 'Reclaim Your Curves'. This group is open to women having a mastectomy and contemplating reconstruction. Women report in on their operations, the aftermath, problems, etc. What is so helpful is that you can ask whatever questions you like about choices and the process, and some woman or a lot of women will immediately tell of their experience and give you personal information and even post pictures. There are no professional medical people on there trying to persuade you either way. I highly recommend it to anyway trying to decide what path to take after a mastectomy.
- GeorginaMaryMember
For me the decision to have reconstruction after my right breast mastectomy was a no-brainer, as I would have been left with one size F breast and a huge prosthesis on the mastectomy one. Instead I had the implant put in immediately and the other breast reduced at the same time so that I am no a size C. Some things did go wrong with me. I had to be re-admitted with an infection in the implant side, followed by an operation to 'wash it out'. As well, tomorrow I am to have an operation to have the failed nipple transplant removed from the reduced breast. It is to be replaced in a few days by a skin graft. For one in ten women with a reduction the nipple relocation does not work, and it failed with me. I will be glad to be rid of it, as there is no nipple on the other side. Down the track I may look at nipple reconstruction, but I have had enough operations for now. I have no regrets about the path that I chose, and love the new size of my breasts, but you need to be aware that it is not necessarily a smooth journey.