Happiness? What's that?
KarynJ
Member Posts: 193 ✭
Comments
-
KarynJ years ago I experienced PTSD after a car accident and had many sessions with a clin.psych. - very beneficial. Over the years I've read extensively and attended many workshops on what we might call 'personal growth'. I learned to take what I want and leave the rest - my rural childhood provided me with an accurate 'bullshit barometer'. Post diagnosis I read a book written by Matthew Carr, title, "Battle Scars: A soldier's Strategies for ........... Cancer". For me it turned out to be the most valuable example of how to shape and affirm my adjustments to this new life, new me. (I think the book is out of print). He found that he needed to find something that was 'utterly' him - to be totally himself in the moment - so he took up surfing. In other words, its important to find something to do in which you become so immersed you actually 'let go'. Its actually a form of meditation which for me is knitting, reading or just staring at the trees. Thanks for your post.
2 -
1
-
I find digging holes is beneficial. Unless it's too hot. Or too cold. Or too dry...
If it is a good day to dig I can become totally self absorbed. There is something about the rhythm of crowbar and shovel and rake which I find very soothing. Then there is the satisfaction of a new garden or a new fence or the transformation of a rough piece of land into a smooth area that will later become lawn (or at least mowable)
I try to conquer, or ignore, the frustration of being so much weaker than I used to be. It takes days to do what used to take hours and motivating myself to start is a problem. There are so many obstacles. But, eventually, the digging gets done.
Maybe that's a strange way to get happy, but it's quieter and less technical than my other source of satisfaction, the maintaining of the woodpile. What ever rings your bell--even if it's just a wee little jingle of a very small one. Mxx4 -
I am reminded of someone I know who, after a very traumatic and unhappy period, 'ran himself sane'. Same theory - self imposed immersion in something very physical, demanding and ultimately satisfying to re-set your emotional and psychological state. Worked for him. Sane and happy.4
-
Yep - I agree, @Afraser - Being totally busy and absorbed in any sort of 'outside' activity - it just fills your brain & doesn't allow negative thoughts to creep back in.
I am positive that it is having the responsibility of running my Uke Group and performing commitments as well as my love of getting out Kayak Fishing that has helped me stay 'relatively sane' so far (some may disagree! LOL) They were my rock both before and after my surgery.
I guess, by playing at Nursing Homes every week - we could be called 'Volunteers' & I would recommend everyone to look at getting involved in a local Nursing Home in some way. Some people never get visitors - so maybe just to chat with them, read the newspaper to them or play an instrument & entertain them - all these things are SO appreciated by the residents. It also takes your mind off your own problems & shows empathy to others, for theirs. We have about 30 residents turn up every week at our practises alone and they join in singing the songs they know!! We sing Happy Birthday to them - one lovely lady turned 90 last week! When some hear their favourite song, sometimes they get very emotional & cry. The power of music is just amazing.
With uke, we have 2 uke practises every week & when we perform, can have up to 4-6 gigs in a given week, even more at Xmas.
With my kayak fishing - I try to get out at least 2-3 times a week - and can be on the water for up to 6hrs, sometimes more. So long as I can drag my kayak to & from the water ..... once out there, I have no aches or pains as I float around - I am FREE!
3 -
Trying to get into a Happy place , but today is not working out , looking at my home loan " overdue" , bills piling up,trying to get to work , but it won't happen for another 3 weeks ( HR has to sort stuff out) , off course no more leave of any kind, don't qualify for any social benefits and even if I did , won't get money before I get back to work (part time) .
Husband after being my rock for the last 12 months is having trouble getting work ( self employed) no money to take on new contracts so working here and there,
My boys , who have just started their 1 st jobs after Uni have been wonderful in keeping us afloat, but I feel guilty about asking them for more, my brother rather suggested I take a holiday ( He'll pay airfare for myself only ), had to laugh at that, I rather have the money but that off course went over his head.(he is enjoying Singapore at the moment).
Sorry to rant , but I can't afford to see the shrink .......0 -
@Silba - can you speak with a Social Worker via your Breast Care Nurse? When I was in distress from continuous bills this time last year ($6000 out of pocket expenses due to diagnosis & surgery) the social worker connected to the hospital arranged for one utility bill (to the value of $300 or thereabouts) to be paid for by the Cancer Council (from donations made by the public.) It wasn't a huge amount - but it was a relief to me.
I hope your hubby can get some jobs in soon .... how wonderful that your boys have stepped up to the plate & are helping out. That is awesome. xx
Don't forget to check out the Otis Foundation (http://otisfoundation.org.au) for the possibility of having a holiday at no expense, other than getting there and taking food and drink. I am going to Thredbo in 2 weeks for 5 days, thru Otis
PM sent
0 -
Silba I recall there has been discussion on dealing with financial difficulties. Giovanna can you advise on this?
0 -
Hi @Silba
Sorry to hear that you are experiencing financial stress at the moment. I have attached a couple of links below with information.
Cancer Council NSW offer financial assistance
https://www.cancercouncil.com.au/get-support/legal-and-financial-assistance/emergency-financial-assistance/
BCNA factsheet
https://www.bcna.org.au/media/4520/bcna-fact-sheet-financial-and-practical-assistance-march-2017.pdf
Please dont hesitate to call our helpline on 1800 500 258 if you would like to speak with one of the cancer nurses for some support and information.
0 -
0
