Second AC, don’t know if I can hack this

@sister sounds like you're doing well! GREAT! yes I had 4 FEC, this and AC are the hard hitting chemos. You may surprise yourself how well you are! x

Thanks for all the support - I read your posts and I'm amazed at then strength of the women on these pages and I know that one day this will all be behind me.  At least, there are only 4 sessions of AC.  I'm having the treatment at Calvary North Adelaide.  So far, they seem very nice and the nurses have been happy to answer my questions when I've rung up.  

At the moment I'm cooking lasagne for the freezer - at least the family should be able to eat okay.

@spillsy Ive been reading the thread and thought Id pop in now and say what an amazing job you are doing. I think we are way too hard on ourselves. I didnt have AC but 4 FEC which is similar and called the (red devil) it was soul destroying on many levels and I was very ill hospitalised after each infusion for 3 days. Taxol was different after that. I just remember at 1 point looking at my wardrobe thinking what am I going to wear to my daughters Yr 12 Graduation at the time and I collapsed so ill on the floor in tears wondering...how am I going to get through this??? how??? So I want to say to you, you ABSOLUTELY WILL, you won't know how you did it but you will and be amazed at what an incredibly strong woman you are. Just be YOU...and lean on the ones that really support you..a great network here of so many understanding people who get it!!! You're on your way...and it will become a memory...believe it!!!! I am now just over 2yrs post chemo and life really is a long way from those moments of despair...YOU TOO will get there.. xx Melinda

@sister all the best, the 1st one is the hardest because of anxiety and fear, but you'll see that you are so supported by wonderful caring staff and you will too be OK!! xx 

You are welcome. I’ll be sending you good vibes. X

Thanks @Sunshine0206

This is my experience with the first AC.

 I had a very frank and honest conversation about my anxiety with the nursing staff. They advised me to take a lorazepam prior to coming in for treatment. My oncologist was aware. It took the edge off. Once i knew what to expect I didn’t need it again.

I haven’t used the lorazepam since. It’s the great unknown that frightens us. Until we do it ourselves , we just don’t know. 

Good luck. 

Thanks everyone.  I'm trying to be positive but getting scared.  I know I'll get through it as so many do and no doubt by this time next week I'll be managing better. 

@Sister  I had my first chemo session on 17th Jan after having the portacath inserted a couple of hours before.  I felt pretty awful for the first four-five days with extreme tiredness, nausea etc but feel I didn’t manage the nausea as well as I could have to get on top of it. I’ve had some pretty good days since then. My next chemo is 7th Feb so I will get on top of the nausea next time. My portacath has been sore but seems to have settled down and not as obvious. I will have my second chemo through the portacath. No option for me as I had an axillary clearance so they can only use one arm atm and veins aren’t so good in that arm. Best of luck with your first chemo, you’ll be ok.  It was so good for me to cross one off the list!! Take care.  Maureen

Great work @Spillsy, it's great when you get back to that 'feeling a bit more human' stage. And yes it's bloody hard being stuck inside unwell so much and hearing the world still going on about its business. You got this Girlfriend - you are doing so well. Biggest hugs xx

@Sister it's okay not to feel brave, it's scary having your life feel out of your control. Chemo is hard. Having your body and mind so unwell is hard. But I know you can do this - we have and made it through the other side! We are here for you. Massive hugs and thinking of you xx