Lost it!

@Sister yep - I’m he same - makes it all the more horrible!!

I finally got out of there and in time to pick up the kids from school (luckily later than normal due to exams).  I was feeling so confident and on top of everything this morning - my biggest concern was what I was going to do with the hour or two before school pickup.  The worst of it was, I did everything right - got there for my 11:10am appointment and checked in at the kiosk and at the main reception, confirmed where I needed to go, got weighed in and directed to the "right" place then waited.  I then asked at that waiting room reception if I should have checked in and got told "no".  Finally, went and asked just how much longer the doctor was going to be then it was panic stations as the doctor was never going to be there.  Eventually, someone was tracked down who knew what was going on and told me that I should have been sent to the floor below.  Sounds straightforward to go directly downstairs but as beautiful as the new Royal Adelaide is, straightforward it isn't.  So, wandering blindly and increasingly panicky, I finally found the right lift and made it to the desk downstairs and could barely talk for the tears.  All of the staff were lovely - turns out they'd been looking for me but I still can't work out how they didn't know where to find me.  I'd been booked for the CT scan (that I didn't know I was having) for 12:30pm and by that time it was nearly 2pm but they got me in for 3:15 after seeing the doctor and the nurse and I got it all done.  I don't think I could have borne to have to go back.  And the tears kept coming on and off.  At least they validated the parking, the cost of which I was dreading.  I've now had codeine for the splitting headache and I feel like shit.  All being well with the rest of chemo, I'll start rads on 9 August.

@joeyliz  Your previous explanatory posts helped prepare me for the scan - thank you

@Renatha @"Kiwi Angel" @Finch If you're like me, you probably don't do tears in public (and I rarely do them in private) - it's just as upsetting when the waterworks start and you can't turn them off.

@zoffiel - I have my first ink...not quite what I would have chosen but then again, I've never had a tatt because I've never been able to decide what I'd want forever.

@sister - hope everything has been done and you are home now.  I remember when I got some incorrect horrific news and was sent to have a contrast CT I was just sitting in the hallway waiting to be squeezed in balling my eyes out - strangers were patting me on the shoulder and finding tissues for me.  Big hugs xox

I have had a couple of public tearful episodes over the past couple of weeks. The Most Public was after surgery for aux dissection, woke up urgently needing to pee forgetting I had a drain in place. The tube came away from the bag and I was freaking out. The District Nurses came early following my panicked phone call, however the nurse was new to community nursing and it was suggested I go to the local Emergency Department. Having only lived in the area 4 years, I'd never been to that part of the hospital, and though I could see the sign, there was no obvious doorway where the arrow pointed. After walking half a block (following the literal direction of the arrow) and back again I reluctantly asked someone (I should be able to find the entrance on my own FFS!) and it was right there, a big sliding door which looked like a window to me. Fortunately there was only one person in line at the counter but it was then that the slow trickle became a deluge of tears in the half-filled waiting room of people. Fortunately one of the nurses on the desk when my turn came and I explained my reason for being there and the reason for the tears, took me straight into a room off to the side, and fixed the tube back into the drain. He said he would tell the manager about my difficulty finding the doorway, but he wasn't aware of anyone else having had that problem before. @Sister all the best, you are not alone xoxo

Oh big hugs my dear
I hope the rest of the appointment went more smoothly xx

I find its when people mess up with appt times, directions, bills , you name it, that's what upsets me most of all.  That's when I get anxious and teary.
i got teary today. Hugs to you Sister, you too will have four dotty tattoos like me. I'm on day 6 of radiation. 
Xxxxx

Good thing about the CT is it doesn't need a contrast--so no needle. Yay. Bad thing is they didn't explain the mapping process or prepare you for it. Who are the muppets responsible for that? This shit can make you lose the plot--which is understandable. I just wish that plot loss didn't come with a side serving of guilt and embarrassment. Hopefully you've been investigated and are now sporting your new tattoos ( I hope they mentioned those)

Holy shitstorm Batgirl, that is a clusterf**k of administrative incompetance! I say let the tears flow. You're in a hospital, and why hide the result of their mistakes from them? Big hug. K xox