Secondaries

Hey BelindaM -  Good on you for putting it all out there.  I too am really tired of all the pink ribbons and positive tough 'rahrahrah' that goes on.  No one it seems really wants to know about it when it goes to secondaries and all those realities you have to deal with.  Like all of us you really need the support and it is often not there although family and friends do try.  We end up supporting them more often than not.  Nothing wrong with a bit of language and thowing a few things around the place.  Scream, cry and let it all out - doesn't actually make you feel better  but it is a release valve of sorts.  Just know that there are a lot of us with secondaries out here - not that many want to talk about the reality of it all.  Yes, planning your funeral is shit - telling your kids and partner is shit, but they will surprise you with their strength.  Then again about the funeral thing, just think how many people would be shuddering with what happened at the end of day rather than being in control - if you are like me you want to be in control!!  Make sure your doctors actually talk with you not at you and emphasis to them that they must actually communicate with you as to what is going on rather than just waffling around the edges.  They also need lessons in how to deal with these issues.

Luv,  Jaci