I don't know how to process any of this anymore. I have been told my lump, originally thought to be 1.5cm was in fact 3.2cm triple negative grade 3. That means I have Stage 2 Breast Cancer. F*&k it!!! I don't know how to deal with this. I feel like there is no hope. I don't want the staging scans as I'm sure they will just tell me it's gone everywhere. I will be seeing an oncologist next week and start Chemotherapy. How the hell did this happen to me. Help ladies I need so much support right now. Mandy x

We are here. I know that it is hard right now but your doctors have probably told you that your cancer is still very treatable. There are many women with similar pathology that have clear scans. It is an awful process and the not knowing is just so hard. Your head gets too far out in front and you start thinking the worst. The scans will probably be clear and you will feel a huge sense of relief when this is confirmed. My tumor was also a lot bigger than the mammogram showed. I had 3 cm tumor and a 3 cm area of DCIS. The bad news for me was that it was in 5 lymph glands. This made my cancer stage 3a. It is a bugger that yours is triple negative but this is still not a death sentence. I know you have probably heard this before but just take it one step at a time. Do you have someone to take with you for the scans and oncologist appointment? This helps you get through and they can be a second pair of ears and even ask questions that you might be too emotional to think of. Chemo we can talk about too, just ask away. Sending lots of hugs your way. Have a good cry it is ok to feel scared but we are here if you want to talk. Deanne xxooooo

I know that you must be in shock and feeling very low right now but don't jump the gun my dear girl. You are doing all the right things, seeing your medical team, planning treatment. I had Stage 2 BC and I can tell you, it's not a death sentence. I am through chemo and surgery and right now I'm cancer free. My Oncologist told me that yes TNBC is aggressive and fast growing but it responds very well to treatment. As opposed to ER+ and/or HER2 + in which case you need to have targeted treatment as well as chemo which can be ongoing for up to 10 years. I had two lumps one was TNBC and one was ER+ and HER2 + both in the same breast. Quite rare apparently but look at me now. NO CANCER! There is always hope Mandy. Things look so black right now but the clouds will clear and you will see you way again. I wrote a poem that might be of help to you if you want to read it. The link is http://www.bcna.org.au/user/12607/blog/62506 Mandy you have begun a difficult journey, there's no denying that. But it is 'doable' and I'm sure that other lovely Pink Sisters will reassure you too that you are not alone. This network has been my savour when I first begun and you will find strength and determination to get through it all like I did. Sending you lots of hugs. Love Janey xxx

I don't know how to deal with this

34 Replies

mandycoop
Member
12 years ago
Thanks Linda,

I am truely grieving my 'old' life at the moment. It is so cruel how many people are hurt by this disease.

Praying for a good outcome. I have seen the oncologist and start chemo next week. I ain't ready to die but not feeling much like a warrior woman at the moment. Day by day.

xxxx
Katsem
Member
12 years ago
I'm reading your update from hospital where I've been since Mon as a planned admission to get Cyclozine intravenously for my nausea....so glad to hear you are feeling more positive:) Be kind it yourself and try not to get ahead of yourself...my analogy is that this journey is like riding up a hill that doesn't seem to end and every so often you need someone to jump out from the bushes and give you a decent shove so you can get a bit further up the hill:))
Katsem
Member
12 years ago
I'm reading your update from hospital where I've been since Mon as a planned admission to get Cyclozine intravenously for my nausea....so glad to hear you are feeling more positive:) Be kind it yourself and try not to get ahead of yourself...my analogy is that this journey is like riding up a hill that doesn't seem to end and every so often you need someone to jump out from the bushes and give you a decent shove so you can get a bit further up the hill:))
Jesslin
Member
12 years ago
Hi Mandy

So sorry to read your post. Its devasting to hear those words that you have cancer. Your world gets turned up side down. I so feel for you.

I was diagnosed in September last year. I had a couple of tumors biggest 8.3cm grade3, stage 3. Four out of five nodes were also positive.

I, like you, also thought that this is it, I am going to die. I lost my mother to BC, she was only 37

But once the shock was gone I went into survival mode and I'm sure you will to. There is no way I am going to let this thing beat me.

Give it time, be true to yourself and your own feelings and deal with one step at a time.

You will have some challenging times ahead, but you will get through it. Remember there is support out there, we have all been there and we are all here for you.

Big hugs

Linda
Jesslin
Member
12 years ago
Hi Mandy

So sorry to read your post. Its devasting to hear those words that you have cancer. Your world gets turned up side down. I so feel for you.

I was diagnosed in September last year. I had a couple of tumors biggest 8.3cm grade3, stage 3. Four out of five nodes were also positive.

I, like you, also thought that this is it, I am going to die. I lost my mother to BC, she was only 37

But once the shock was gone I went into survival mode and I'm sure you will to. There is no way I am going to let this thing beat me.

Give it time, be true to yourself and your own feelings and deal with one step at a time.

You will have some challenging times ahead, but you will get through it. Remember there is support out there, we have all been there and we are all here for you.

Big hugs

Linda
mandycoop
Member
12 years ago
Hi ladies

I am feeling a bit more positive today after spending the day with my two beautiful brothers and their gorgeous families. I am so very blessed to have so many loving people around me. I have also joined a facebook site called Young Pink Sisters for those of us under 50 with breast cancer, Many women on there have had similar or worse stories than mine, as have some of you. I am so sad that this disease affects so many beautiful women (and men) and their families. God willing a cure is found soon. It is such a tragedy.

I am ready to start treatment but I still don't know if I am ready to hear scan results just yet so I will talk to the oncologist first.

Robyn I live on the Gold Coast, having been originally from Tasmania and then lived in Melbourne for 10 years.

I have decided that I am NOT going to be a statistic and die, as I have too much to live for. I'm sure this journey is going to suck but cancer will not take me away from those I love!!!!

Thank you to all of you who are supporting me, and all the other women like me, travelling this very scary and sometimes very lonely journey of breast cancer, I vow to support others too when I can say I am cancer free!!!

Much love xxxx
mandycoop
Member
12 years ago
Hi ladies

I am feeling a bit more positive today after spending the day with my two beautiful brothers and their gorgeous families. I am so very blessed to have so many loving people around me. I have also joined a facebook site called Young Pink Sisters for those of us under 50 with breast cancer, Many women on there have had similar or worse stories than mine, as have some of you. I am so sad that this disease affects so many beautiful women (and men) and their families. God willing a cure is found soon. It is such a tragedy.

I am ready to start treatment but I still don't know if I am ready to hear scan results just yet so I will talk to the oncologist first.

Robyn I live on the Gold Coast, having been originally from Tasmania and then lived in Melbourne for 10 years.

I have decided that I am NOT going to be a statistic and die, as I have too much to live for. I'm sure this journey is going to suck but cancer will not take me away from those I love!!!!

Thank you to all of you who are supporting me, and all the other women like me, travelling this very scary and sometimes very lonely journey of breast cancer, I vow to support others too when I can say I am cancer free!!!

Much love xxxx
mum2jj
Member
12 years ago
I have had two triple negative diagnoses. Eighteen months apart. Same breast. Both were 3cm in size. First one also had a positive node, however other 6 clear and eight more after recurrence and , Mastectomy clear. I am now four and half years from initial diagnosis and just over two years from 2nd diagnosis. Admittedly I have done chemo twice and radiation once which was not the easiest thing in the world, but doable. Here I am nearly 4 1/2 years from initial diagnosis and so far all scans remain clear. I know it's hard, however the results of the scans, which hopefully will be clear will help determine what treatment you need. The girls on this site are here for you. Hang in there Sending you a big hug xxxx Paula :)
mum2jj
Member
12 years ago
I have had two triple negative diagnoses. Eighteen months apart. Same breast. Both were 3cm in size. First one also had a positive node, however other 6 clear and eight more after recurrence and , Mastectomy clear. I am now four and half years from initial diagnosis and just over two years from 2nd diagnosis. Admittedly I have done chemo twice and radiation once which was not the easiest thing in the world, but doable. Here I am nearly 4 1/2 years from initial diagnosis and so far all scans remain clear. I know it's hard, however the results of the scans, which hopefully will be clear will help determine what treatment you need. The girls on this site are here for you. Hang in there Sending you a big hug xxxx Paula :)
Janey235
Member
12 years ago
I live in the Melbourne Northern suburbs Mandy. If you're in Melbourne and want to have a coffee and a chat, I'd be happy to meet with you :) Janey xxx

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I don't know how to deal with this

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