Scared worried and confused

When did you have surgery? Did you say just over a week ago?  I'd be checking if you can put deodorant on yet as healing comes first.  
As to housework and lifting et cetera it is all a graduated thing, not yet, it is too early.  Supermarket on-line shopping is helpful if it is available where you are
Take care

Thank u so much I put deodorant on and yes it feels like I don't put it on under there and it swollen under the arm pit still not been able to do anything is starting to get to me like not able to drive the car or doing house work or even shopping it feels like I don't have indapendance yet but I know soon enough I will be able to do all the things I did before surgery I will get it back again

Hi @Leilani  - SO Sorry that you've 'joined the club' - but you are in the best spot for the best advice, here on BCNA!  ;)   I hope everything is going well for you.

I didn't like the feel of the bra after my surgery, so only wore it for a couple of days when I got home - tho it sort of protected my surgery area (my whole nipple was isolated & all surgery done under it & then sewn back on.)    And I wasn't really used to it either, as I'd never worn one prior to surgery for 40 years!  Yeah, I'm an old Hippy!  Even tho it was a soft 'sports bra' type - it sort of felt too tight for me (and I tried different sizes too.) 

The under arm numbness can hang around for quite a while .... everyone is different.    As @iserbrown said - it feels so weird when putting deodorant on as you are not sure if you missed!  You don't even feel the 'coolness' of it, let alone the path you took with it!  ;)   Use the mirror  :)  (I found that I actually needed MORE deodorant post surgery too, as I seemed to develop a really STRONG BO problem in that armpit!!  (Maybe it was just sweating more due to the 'trauma' of the surgery?)  It has settled down now, tho I have also changed brand of deodorants!)

How wonderful that your daughter has been so supportive of you. That is terrific.  Re your niece's BD ..... yep, see how you feel - and that is with EVERYTHING you do from her on .... Don't be afraid of trying to get back to doing what you love 'as you feel up to it'.  It could well be the best therapy for you!  

After my surgery, I almost felt like wearing an arm sling once I was getting 'out & about again' - so that it restricted me from doing too much with it until I was able (reaching for high things, picking things up etc.)  It also advises 'others' (like in supermarkets etc) that you have an injury & don't want to be jostled?

All the best for your recovery & treatment xx

My daughter is 17 as well and she has been to nearly every appointments that I have and I talk to her about what might happen with like treatment. It's my nieces 6th B-Day next week and she asked me if I can come to her party and I said that I will see how I go and how I'm feeling and I told her that if I can't make it I will buy her a present and send it to her

Hi @Leilani just a couple of things to add to the other ladies. Remember to acknowledge to yourself that this is a truely horrible shock, ( if you had had a car accident it would almost be easier to understand the instant change of life), it's so hard in those first days but try to breathe and remember you deserve and should come first. You sound very social. Maybe an easy way of dealing with the invites, like your neices bday, say you will do your best to come, then on the day if you aren't up to it just wish her a lovely day and say ' I won't be there I'm not feeling well enough but look forward to seeing pictures. This way you immediately remove your own mind talk about going or not going. Really I'm sure your family just want you well. 
My daughter was 17 when I was diagnosed and she found it better if I would let her know what was happening as I knew it. This stopped her imagining the worst. (I did always put a positive spin on the info). 
Im 3 years down the track and all good. Lots of ladies on here are years and years past their first diagnosis. Xxo 

Thank u so much for ur help

Just wanted to say take care and try and roll with it.  
The normality of what you had prior may not return as the node clearance has upset the nerves and the lymphatic system.  My armpit used to feel wet for a long time as well as numb.  In time I had a lymphatic drainage massage as the system needs to find new pathways.  Ask when you can start using deodorant again, and that is hilarious when it is numb because you are not sure if you have rolled it on or not!  Have to laugh!
It will all work out, just the minute details are not always explained until you are in it and wondering, who the, what the!
Everyone here has words of wisdom borne through experience, just ask away!

Thank u for all ur help I might try it on when the drainage tube comes out

I wore the same bra post mastectomy as before, it was comfortable, didn't touch my scar and was easy to put a soft pad in. Only changed when I finally got a prosthesis. I wore it home post mastectomy (3 days). Unless you are given very specific instructions (which you should follow) do what feels comfortable (ie no
pain or discomfort) and makes you feel good. That's really important! The sooner you can feel good about yourself, and your body, on this trip the better! 

Thank u for all ur help