Isn't it interesting, the way we can step outside ourselves when everything suddenly turns to crap? The cancer train is actually designed for passengers who have no idea where they are going; you get on it, almost by accident, and before you know what has happened, you are miles away from yourself.
You've had a wretched thing happen, it takes a while to process this stuff. I think we all have a default factory setting when it comes to dealing with disasters of any description--some put their battle undies on, some call in all the reinforcements they can, others crawl under the bed and suck their thumbs. All perfectly reasonable responses.
Try to concentrate on the immediate problems if you are finding it too hard to look ahead. It's all so exhausting--hang in there. MXX
