@kmakm Sometimes the heavens open up and just rain a shitstorm, don't they? I'm sure you're on top of it, but just in case you're not (and I know you've got so much energy to sort everything out), have you looked into what care your father-in-law might be entitled to (I also don't know how active he is)? My in-laws are entitled to quite a bit under different schemes and, although your situation is different, I would assume that you could make a claim as being an invalid carer (not that I know an awful lot about this stuff but might be worth trying to find out). This may mean that you can get services to help out. It might not be much but, hell..I'd give over the cooking and cleaning to someone else any day of the week!